Virginia Ruth Virginia Ruth

Stark Reality

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Nope. Not a newly discovered pre-quel to the IronMan series.

Nor a desert landscape nor a parallel universe.

Unfortunately it is the description of the reality of today.

Stark. Meaning desolate. Barren. Severe or bare in appearance.

I read a 1918 interview with a Washington DC gentleman during the national shut-down due to the “Spanish” flu pandemic. He commented on life, “You had no community life, you had no school life, you had no church life, you had nothing.”

I have been struck by his observation these last couple of weeks. As I walk through the neighborhood I am aware of the quiet streets and the hush from the nearby college. No hustle and bustle of walking or driving students. The elementary school yard is empty and devoid of the cadence of children’s voices and screams. Any gathering places in parks have seats cordoned off. Peering in the window of some local restaurants, the seating arrangements look like they are doing a massive floor cleaning, not providing any service. When we walk outside, any encounter with another pedestrian is not a parallel passage but rather a wide berthed elliptical movement. Grocery and retail store shelves are still devoid of products. Our church sanctuary is completely empty: the Bibles and hymnals have been removed. There are no traditional Christmas trees or volumes of poinsettias, no decorations of Christmas’s past. Even our movements amount to nothing for we cannot come and go as we please. No visiting certain family members. No travel plans for holidays. No “just popping” into the store without masking, lining up and waiting. Our lives are barren of any interaction (or not much).

I feel that my own comments in 2020 could mirror the 1918 response: No community life, no school life, no church life, nothing. In our current pandemic stark reality, I wonder- are we truly left without community? Are we just independent islands- quarantined from others in our own little bubbles and pods? Beholden only to ourselves?

The stark reality is that while we may be self-isolated for now, we are not independent. We are co-dependent social creatures and that requires living a controlled freedom. Actually, I think we always have been living like that to some degree: the tension between freedom and responsibility. It is the tension between being independent and in control of our decisions of whoever, whatever, whenever, wherever, however, why-ever we want, pulling against with the role of responsibility that may subjugate my desires, wishes, preferences or needs for another’s desires, wishes, preferences or needs.

We view freedom as being independent. Solely independent. Self-sufficient. Yet, as anyone who has raised children, especially during the teenage years- the more freedom and independence one is granted is determined by one’s responsibility. The more responsible a teenager is, the more freedom she receives.

Similar to the idea of fire. In essence, one cannot just start off lighting fires. We do not let small children play with matches. Only after instruction, demo and careful observation do we allow someone who has never started a fire, to do so. There are guidelines in establishing a fire that must be heeded or the blaze could take over and ruin a house, devastate a landscape or even kill individuals. There is self-imposed control with fire. Even the structure of where one builds a fire determines that there are controls: one cannot just start a fire in the middle of one’s living room. (Course one can, but that will be the first and last time one does.) One ignites a fire in a fireplace or pit that can withstand the heat intensity. There is a physical restraint or restriction with fires.

So too, I think that we need to recognize that freedom/control/restraint/responsibility tension in our society and how we deal with the pandemic.

We can self-isolate and remove ourselves into our own little bubbles but we still need each other. If anything happens to us, God forbid we did get sick with COVID, we need each other for help and care. But more than anything else, we need each other because we are social creatures and have to interact. The stark reality is that we are not independent islands. If we want the freedom to do what we want, when we want it, then we will have to be responsible in seeing that we do not spread the virus and be responsible for our individual actions.

One of the ways we show our responsibility is in taking commonsense measures to help contain the spread of the virus: masking, socially distancing, hand washing. And, receiving the vaccine when it is our turn to do so.

I heard one of the best socially responsible responses to the actions we should take during this pandemic stark reality: (If the video link does not work, click HERE.)

What about you? Do you feel independent? Free? Responsible? For yourself? Others? As a child, were you allowed to do certain things? What were the conditions? Have you ever had your freedom revoked? How do you live into the tension between freedom and responsibility?

Stark can also mean “complete, extreme”. Maybe this stark reality in which we live is showing us the complete reality in which we need to live? Perhaps we will see that we are interdependent: weighing our individual need for freedom with the responsibility of caring for others.

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Virginia Ruth Virginia Ruth

Overwhelmed

Ever feel that the wave is coming towards you and there is no way out?

Ever feel that the wave is coming towards you and there is no way out?

From the movie: 10 Things I Hate about You:

Chastity : I know you can be overwhelmed, and you can be underwhelmed, but can you ever just be whelmed?

Bianca : I think you can in Europe.


Whelm:

transitive verb

  •  to turn (something, such as a dish or vessel) upside down usually to cover something : cover or engulf completely with usually disastrous effect

  • to overcome in thought or feeling : OVERWHELM “whelmed with a rush of joy”— G. A. Wagner

intransitive verb

  • to pass or go over something so as to bury or submerge it

  • Synonyms- crush, devastate, floor, grind (down), oppress, overcome, overmaster, overpower, overwhelm, prostrate, snow under, swamp


Underwhelmed: verb HUMOROUS:

  • past tense: underwhelmed; past participle: underwhelmed fail to impress or make a positive impact on (someone); disappoint. "American voters seem underwhelmed by the choices for president."

  • Underwhelmed began as a sarcastic comment about not feeling overly excited or overjoyed.


Overwhelmed: verb (used with object):

  • to overcome completely in mind or feeling: overwhelmed by remorse.

  • to overpower or overcome, especially with superior forces; destroy; crush: Roman troops were overwhelmed by barbarians.

  • to cover or bury beneath a mass of something, as floodwaters, debris, or an avalanche; submerge: Lava from erupting Vesuvius overwhelmed the city of Pompeii.

  • to load, heap, treat, or address with an overpowering or excessive amount of anything: a child overwhelmed with presents;

  • to overwhelm someone with questions.

  • to overthrow.


I don’t know about you but lately I am feeling whelmed and overwhelmed. It is if ALL of those definitions apply to me and my feelings and can be related to COVID-19. The pathetic thing is that I feel this way even though I am not suffering from COVID nor do I have any immediate family or friends that are. In fact, the pandemic hasn’t really impacted our lives too much. Sure, we have had to cancel trips and family gatherings and it is heartbreaking and upsetting that we cannot see my mother-in-law. But compared to many people, we are virtually unscathed. Yet, everything about this pandemic is overwhelming me- the news coverage, the changing dynamics of reports, responses and policies, the reaction of friends and family, the new “normal” of shopping, walking the dog and general interacting ( or not) with others, the planning, replanning, planning again based on new governmental guidelines.

I want to say ENOUGH already. Like most things in life, ENOUGH comes through the  insignificant, immaterial and shallow items of life: it is the straw that breaks the camel’s back. Those little annoyances that drive us crazy. Recently for me, it was a certain fragrant candle that I like and was hoping to purchase. It reminds me of our beach home and is one I associate with hunkering down and writing. It is part of my ritual. Alas, I cannot get the candle in any store nearby. It used to be plentiful but for some reason- the manufacture is either putting those soy candle resources into something else, the factory is shut down, or everyone else is burning candles like I am- even the manufacturer’s website is “out of stock”.

Just like the cleaning products that are still scarce. As one of the check out gals remarked to me as we were talking about staying safe and cleaning during the pandemic, “Didn’t these people ever clean before?” Being cleaning fanatics, we couldn’t understand why the items would fly off the shelf now? If you were regularly cleaning, it wouldn’t be that much more of investment of items or time to keep things “pandemicly” clean. As she said, “Do they really need to be reminded to wash their hands? If so, what were (or were not) they doing before?”

I now realize how much I expect that when I go to the store, I can get whatever is on my list. Before, I never gave it much thought that what I “needed” would not be available. At the beginning of the pandemic, I understood and accepted the limitations of supplies. It is just hard to still experience those limitations five almost six months into the pandemic when we are supposedly returning to “normal”. It isn’t as if I have any exotic item on my list. Having rations and limits to resources is something with which I, and I suspect most Americans, are not familiar.

As I have reminded others, I need to remind myself- this too shall pass. When we are in the middle of a situation it is hard to see any perspective. Kind of like having your nose pressed up against an elephant’s backside- hard to know exactly where you are, what you are experiencing and when it will end? (Not that I have had first hand experience in elephant smooshing… but you get the picture.)

I have been reading lots of different books during this COVID time. Subconsciously it seems as if my common denominator with both fiction and non-fiction books are ones that take place either during WWI or WWII. In one of the books (Jacqueline Winspear, The American Agent: A Maisie Dobbs Novel- I highly recommend the Maisie Dobbs series!) the characters experience the London Blitz. For fifty-seven consecutive nights they experienced the pounding of the Luftwaffe. Beginning on the night of September 7, 1940 German airstrikes attacked the city. After those consecutive nights, Londoners were still susceptible to bomb attacks and would be until May 1941. That is a long time to be anxious and fearful that you might lose your shelter, employment and loved ones each and every night.

Recently I heard a quote from the ABC News anchor, Robin Roberts in speaking to my favorite singer/songwriter who underwent heart surgery this summer: “Make your mess your message.” She was asking, what is it that interviewee learned from her experience? How can that help others?

I am thinking of this mess that we call living in the time of COVID-19. What is it that you are learning? About yourself? About others? About life?

I am learning that when I feel overwhelmed I need to take a step back and slow down. My husband has been reading various articles from an African philosopher. There is an African proverb- when situation is urgent, we must slow down. I think that is good advice for this rapidly spinning chaotic atmosphere in which we find ourselves. I find that I need to ensure that I have time to step back, reflect and regroup- to not feel overwhelmed by an engulfing tide of COVID information or the swirling current of fear.

I am also using this time of change, of rations, and of waiting for items to come into the store as opportunities to be grateful and for prayer: to be grateful that I am able to purchase things, even if I have to wait. It is a good reminder that many people in the world do not have what they need, much less want. To pray and think of others who are less fortunate. I also am trying to think of creative ways to help those who might be in need- whether that is supporting local businesses or sharing resources with charitable organizations.

In our small group we are reading the book, Dangerous Prayers by Craig Groeschel. One thing that Groeschel suggests is that when we are going through a tough time, that is the best time to reach out to God and to reach out to others. So, while I need a hunkering down, slower pace in my schedule, I also need to balance that with reaching out and serving beyond myself. I think of Paul’s letter to the Philippians, “Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.” (Philippians 2: 4)

The problem with the word whelm, overwhelmed or underwhelmed is that they focus on the extremes. and there really is not room for extremes in our lives. Especially during difficult times. We need to demonstrate balance. When life is messy, our message should be to carry on- to step back, regroup and rearrange our priorities, time, resources that is balanced between caring for ourselves and for others.

What about you? Are you overwhelmed? Underwhelmed? Whelmed? What do you do to respond to it?

I liken the extreme feeling of being overwhelmed to a giant wave ready to engulf and swamp me. But, as I have mentioned before, I have found that the best way to combat the pounding waves is to ride them into shore or dive into the middle. Both might require a bold initial step or movement but once there, calmness can be found.


**Thank you for the prayers regarding my eyes. Still about the same- talk about Paul’s analogy of looking through a glass dimly. I am living Paul’s metaphor as I wait for this detachment to occur. I am sure that there are lessons/blog posts in this experience! While it is quite annoying that I do not have clear vision, I am grateful that I still can see, do not have any pain or headaches and that this too shall pass.

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Virginia Ruth Virginia Ruth

One Goal

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The other day I heard an educator speaking about what parents can do this summer in light of the COVID-19 home “schooling”. She suggested that parents along with their children determine one goal that the child would achieve over the summer. It needs to be age appropriate, doable and achievable. The thought that having a goal (or perhaps more- but do them one at a time) is good for building structure into children’s lives.

I was thinking that having one goal this summer might be good for adults as well. And if we have any young people in our lives perhaps have the goal together: read a book together and discuss via facetime, zoom or the old fashion way- letter writing; take an online class together; design a memory book- share stories and pictures from your childhood. The possibilities are endless. The goals might be practical or might be things you always wanted to learn to do. In learning a new skill, focus on one aspect of it. For example, if learning how to sew, plan on making decorative bedroom pillows as a way to learn stitching.

Some suggestions of goals for children and adults:

  • Learn a language or at least some basic phrases (high achieving- at least it is for me!).

  • Read one book a week or any other determined number.

  • Learn to cook a favorite meal, bake cookies, or properly chop and use of kitchen tools.

  • Learn to ride a bike or a new swim stroke.

  • Learn how to write a letter. (how to address the envelope, salutation, etc.)

  • Learn how to balance a check book, make a budget.

  • Learn how to sew or any other handiwork: knit, crochet, needlepoint.

  • Learn a new-to-you board game. Try “Go”, allegedly the oldest board game, mahjong, chess, cribbage, backgammon.

  • Plant a garden: raise some type of vegetable, fruit or flowers.

  • Take an artist challenge. Click here for a fun- 21 day artist challenge.

  • Explore the world through video- whole host of vignettes for adults and children on Viking cruise website. Click here.

  • Take an electronic sabbatical ala Bill Gates for a week- “unplug” from emails, screen time, etc.

  • For the overachievers, our son introduced us to these amazing youtube videos of a gentleman who does everything by hand. His channel is a “cooking” channel, but the food aspect is nothing compared to his preparation for the meal. For instance, there is a cooked fish video which is all about his making a waterproof hat (splitting the bamboo and weaving it) in order to sit in the rain to catch the fish. Click here to watch him build a stone grill.

What about you? What things would you like to explore this summer? What can you do together with your family or friends?

One goal. One summer

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Virginia Ruth Virginia Ruth

Climbing Stairs

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Twice now in the last week, while I was walking up the basement steps carrying the laundry basket I experienced an odd sensation of not knowing where the next step was located. The basket had occluded my vision and so as I stepped up I was not really seeing where I was going. I just stepped where I thought was the next step. Even though I had enough lighting to see where I was going, I still couldn’t quite see the path.

It made me think of our walking through this pandemic. While we may carry on the best way we know how, there are still obstacles that prevent us from knowing if where we once trod is still the right footing. We go through the motions but our vision and our footing has shifted- Our understanding of staying healthy has changed. Our gathering space is different. Our priorities are rearranged. Our time lines and schedules are obsolete.

I am thinking of how the pandemic has shifted my focus. Things about which I used to be concerned have no place in my mind’s eye now. For that I am grateful. I realized how much time and energy I have spent on mundane and shallow thoughts. When I start fretting about insignificant ideas, I remind myself that in the long run, in light of the pandemic life/death scenario, these thoughts are not worth the time.

The pandemic has underscored my need to be following God in faith. No one and nothing else can guide me safely along.

I find that I have to walk by faith and not by sight (2 Corinthians 5: 7). I have to trust God in and with my future plans and I have to learn (and relearn) what God’s path is for me. Circumstances may obscure my vision but I have to trust God where I place my next step. As many times as I may say this- I still have to remind myself daily to trust God.

The thing about stepping in faith is that the more we do it, the easier it becomes. I couldn’t tell you how many times I have walked up and down our basement steps in the twenty five years we have lived in our home. Yet, I am familiar with each step- each creak, worn wood, height from one to another. While I wouldn’t intentionally do it, I could blindly walk up and down them as they are so familiar.

What about you? Have you ever been limited by what you have seen and not seen? What was that experience like? What did you learn from it? How are you walking by faith? Stumbling? Sure-footed?

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Virginia Ruth Virginia Ruth

Come Together * (or at least 6 feet apart)

March has been an incredible, life-altering month for us as Americans and as a world. Our generation is experiencing depravation, isolation, and fear that we haven’t experienced or collectively experienced in a long time. We see people squandering and hoarding resources yet we also see people carrying on in the bravest of ways.

It was the best of times. It was the worst of times.

It makes my heart sing when I see people behaving in the best of times mode. These are the “helpers” as Mr. Rogers would say. When I was a boy and I would see scary things in the news, my mother would say to me, Look for the helpers. You will always find people who are willing to help.

Look for the helpers.

I keep hearing about small acts of kindnesses and help. In our beach town, there is a group of children who will ride their bikes to the store to pick up much needed items for their self-quarantined shut-in neighbors. One of the moms rides with them.

I heard of a similar type of helping of apartment building neighbors near New Rochelle, NY. Many of the elderly neighbors do not have access to the internet and so cannot order groceries online. They leave a list out for their neighbors and others in the building will pick up what is needed.

On the social media neighborhood accounts, there are numerous offers to help others, reminders of people to look out for others, sharing resources and information and even specific inquiries about the whereabouts of “resident” homeless persons.

While this pandemic is currently devastating and will continue to be ( for we do not even know what life will look like in the weeks, months and even years ahead), there has been some surprising societal side-effects:

I have heard from many friends and neighbors that they are surprised that the stay-at-home edict is seen as a welcome. They are welcoming this slower paced lifestyle. Many have said that they have gone from an almost difficult to read, packed with writing, full calendar to one with scratched out and blank, empty spaces in the blink of a news conference. I know that my husband and I are wondering about our time management or lack thereof. Our Jan, Feb, March monthly calendar blocks were almost solidly black with written- in appointments, meetings, and deadlines. Our April calendar looks like it came out of the wrapper- the only entries are the factory printed ones: Palm Sunday, Good Friday, Passover, Easter, National Arbor Day.

There has been time to do the “rainy day projects”- renamed “pandemic projects.” Many folks are finally getting to the clean out and clean up of clutter. They are sprucing up gardens and yards. They are prioritizing the material things in their homes.

I have heard of others who have decided to daily contact someone from their community (apartment building, condo, neighborhood, extended circle of friends) to see how they are doing and to offer a little chat. For me, it is reminiscent of my great-Aunt who, in her nineties and being primarily home-bound, took it upon herself to call the “shut-ins” from her church to check in with them, offer a kind word and listening ear and to pray for them. How fortunate we are to have many forms of technology that we can do so.

There is a greater appreciation of being in one another’s physical presence and the longing for touch. Even the introverts seem to agree that there is a missed sense of belonging when one cannot physically gather.

This might be the time to resurrect the snail mail. When one cannot touch a person, there is something to be said for a hand-written letter- knowing that the person who wrote the note physically touched the paper, etc. While video chats are great, letters can be reread and held- a paper chain of touch.

It is wonderful to see families walking, jogging or bicycling together. I realize the novelty of all being home 24/7 may wear out in another week or so, but I wonder if families will settle into a different and new pattern of appreciation of being together? I have a neighbor who thinks divorce rates will increase after this settles down, but I wonder if some marriages will be strengthened instead- maybe without all the extraneous distractions, people will remember why they fell in love with their spouse in the first place.

I have noticed that when I have gone to the grocery store there is not the frenetic atmosphere that usually persists. People are still scrambling to get provisions, but it is almost as if everyone has finally recognized that this is for the long haul and no store is going to have the same stock as pre-pandemic stock. While there is a prevailing hush and people are mindful on one another- social distancing, there are conversations occurring down the aisles. I have heard people catching up with each other about the status of family and friends. I have also seen and heard shoppers be very appreciative to the grocery workers, saying a thank you, morning pleasantry or just looking them in the eye and recognizing them- perhaps for the first time. Of course, in moving through the store, some shoppers will smile at each other while others are head down as if the contagion is spread through the glimpse of an iris.

It sure is sad that it takes something of this magnitude for us to realize that we do need one another and that our survival depends on one another.

What about you? What have you noticed about the people around you? Have you seen any helpers? What creative ways have you seen others coming together - with the appropriate social distance?

One thing I thought we could do as an encouraging community is to offer an encouraging word or picture each day- something on which we can meditate, think, ponder, focus. Something that might take our minds off of the current situation at least for the moment, I will (try) post everyday for the month of April. Just a short snippet of inspiration (hopefully) which we will title: Words and Pictures. [If you haven’t seen the film by the same name- free with ads on Youtube. An okay film (after more weeks sequestered it might seem like a masterpiece) depicting 2 teachers- one Art and one English and a competition between the two with students deciding if painting or literature is the best.]



* Come Together. “Bum bum, dodadoo. do. Bum bum. dodadoo. do” (Best attempt to write out the sound of the base line to the beginning of the song.) During my stay-at-home, I have been spring cleaning to Paul McCartney radio on Pandora. The Beatles song, Come Together has been circulating in my head.

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Virginia Ruth Virginia Ruth

Today’s To-Do List

The beauty and fullness of the spring trees belie the world’s predicament.

The beauty and fullness of the spring trees belie the world’s predicament.

If you are like me, the thought of this pandemic is unbelievable. I can grasp the temporary self-quarantine, the limited groceries, and the reduced traffic on the roads. Except for the beautiful spring weather, it is almost as if we are having a prolonged snow day. But. If I think about the predictions, the length of time that businesses will be closed, that there is no place in the world to escape the pandemic, and that all places are experiencing the same, then I cannot grasp the situation. When I really try and grasp the breadth, depth and complete change to society I become overwhelmed. It is like trying to understand eternity. Incomprehensible.

The thing is, so far, it is not as bad as it could be. A friend reminded me of Anne Frank and the people who had to hide during the Nazi regime. Talk about unbelievable. I wonder as they sat in silence in small, dark spaces, did they remember the previous days, weeks, years when life was full, free and without restraint? Did they look forward to a future of things they would do, places they would visit, people they would encounter?

Part of this COVID-19 experience is being in the present: we cannot bemoan the past nor can we predict and plan too much for the future. We need to be where we are, right here, right now. We need to be present and aware of what is currently going on in our lives, our community, our state, our country and our world.

It occurs to me we have two things to do: care for ourselves (the old adage of first putting on the oxygen mask before we can help others) and care for one another. I’ve been thinking about different ways to be present each day and go through this experience with (hopefully) prudence, grace, love and maybe even with some joy thrown in.

Ways to care for ourselves:

  • Learn something new online. Many art museums offer educational online components. Sometimes the presentation is geared more for school-aged children but it still might be something new to you. The National Gallery of Art has virtual tour of its collection.

  • Listen to podcasts from Spotify, Pandora. Check out your local library online to see what ebooks, audio and video items are available.

  • Look at youtube for classes offered from different universities. You can also find exercise videos. One of my favorite online yoga videos is on Youtube- Yoga with Adriene.

  • Try to accomplish one project around the house. It can give you a mental boost to feel that something was accomplished during this unusual time. Unfortunately if it is de-cluttering, you might have trouble getting rid of the clutter (many non-profits are closed and dumps may have limited hours) but you might be able to move all the things that are to go out of the house to either a garage, shed, backyard or at least boxed, labeled and ready for removal once “stay at home” recommendations are lifted.

  • Read the Bible. If you have never picked up a Bible, now is as good a time as any to do so. Or, if that seems too daunting, read a daily devotional. Many can be delivered daily to your email or phone. Click here to read Rick Warren’s daily devotional.

  • Sleep. Eat. Move. Practice good health habits. It is never too early to start. Even if you have underlying chronic conditions, you can strive to be as healthy as you can. You may not avoid getting sick but being as healthy as you can, might lessen symptoms and improve outcomes.

  • As always, practice good hand washing hygiene and social distancing. CDC guidelines. If you do not feel well, stay at home and self-isolate. One thing I have noticed some people are using gloves and masks and they really do not need them. Common sense (stay at home) and frequent hand washing with soap and water. Let the health care professionals who need gloves, masks and equipment (sanitizers) have them.

Ways to care for others:

  • Phone call, text or email to check in on your family, friends, neighbors. It is especially important for those who live alone to know that they are not forgotten.

  • If you are in the not-at-risk category- offer to get groceries for an at-risk neighbor (elderly, chronic condition). Offer to get groceries for a health care professional so that they do not have to stand on line after a long shift.

  • If your local restaurant is still offering take out, order a meal once a week or whatever your budget will allow.

  • Pray. When I start feeling anxious about loved ones and the future, I pause. Take a deep breath. Pray. I remember all the ways God has cared for me, my family and others in the past. I turn over all my fears and anxieties to God, trusting that He will continue to care for me, my family and others. Sometimes it is a minute by minute practice.

I have also been thinking about gratitude. The same friend who reminded me of Anne Frank also said that each evening she and her husband think of three things for which to be grateful. What an uplifting way to end the day, especially when each day brings difficult news. I heard an interview recently with the author Diana Butler Bass. Click here for the interview. Starting at 23:33 are 4 great reasons for gratitude. On her website she has some other resources for ways to practice gratitude: Click here.

What about you? What are some things you are doing during this surreal and unusual times? Are you able to care for yourself? For others? What does that look like?

Sometimes it is difficult to even take comfort from words from the Bible. But, it is important to do so. Let the words flow over and around us, letting them soak in. In the video with Ms. Butler Bass she talks about the Bible verse: “give thanks in all circumstances” (I Thessalonians 5: 18 NIV). What she notes is that it doesn’t say give thanks for all things. The word “in” in NT Greek means “through”. Through all things give thanks. What she reminds the listener is that there are many situations which we are not thankful for (nor should we): oppression, evil, injustice, sin. But we can be grateful and thankful as we go through the experience and that is what can get us to the other side.

Today’s to-do is to be grateful. Gratitude is a discipline (tool) that can help us uncover and accept our past and shape and set the tone for our future.

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Virginia Ruth Virginia Ruth

Peace and Calm

I know.  It has become a cliche but I must say, it is a good reminder…

I know. It has become a cliche but I must say, it is a good reminder…

I think most people would say that they do not feel at peace or any sense of calm especially in today’s environment. The world seems to be going crazy. In just one week we have gone from a relatively normal existence to scrambling for toilet paper and goods, focusing on every sniffle, ache and pain, and washing and gelling our hands until they are raw. There is no escape- every where in the world it is relatively the same.

In the Sunday NYTimes there was an article about the 1964 Alaskan earthquake. A newly formed team of sociologists charged to study disaster planning in the wake of the cold war, arrived in Alaska expecting to find chaos. Instead, they saw a community coming together, using its resources and experience to help one another. The president of the mountaineer club volunteered to organize a search and rescue. Neighbors were helping neighbors recover household items and sharing meals. They did not find the neighbors looting or hoarding. Just assisting one another.

The other night I saw part of a David Attenborough documentary about Africa. He was highlighting the beautiful yet stark, harsh conditions of the Sahara Desert. As you can imagine no water is to be found anywhere except at few and far between oasis. There is one such spot that contains a large lake which turns out to have hyper-salinity. More so than any ocean and in ingesting it, many animals die. Because of the deaths, it also is home to plague-like proportions of flies.

In a remarkable turn of events, the thirsty migratory birds stop, not necessarily for the water but for the flies: in eating the flies they get hydrated. Talk about making lemonade from lemons. Or water from flies. (I have heard of “like water for chocolate” but never like water for flies.)

All this makes me think of our current situation. Not that I welcome COVID-19. Certainly not as a thirsty traveler welcomes an oasis or as a community building activity. But who knows the whys and what for’s in this pandemic crisis? Is there an opportunity in what we are experiencing? Some hidden blessing or unimaginable alternative? From all the disaster movies of the 1970’s, we know that panic doesn’t help any situation. (although it makes quite a drama). Can we be calm? If sociologists came to our community, would they find us carrying on and helping each other?

What are we to do when we feel that our lives have crumbled around us and that the reality that we knew, no longer exists or supports us? How do we (try to) maintain a peaceful and calm demeanor?

While I have no answers, I do know the One who does. I do know that God is sovereign and that I need to trust Him even when, and especially when, life seems chaotic and out of control.

Ideas that I try to instill in myself so that I may (or attempt to) have the peace that passeth all understanding:

1) God is in control and world leaders, health professionals and I are not. That doesn’t mean that God has caused COVID-19, or that He is sitting watching all of this unfold like a grand chess master. Nor does it mean that I turn off my God-given mind and become complacent to all that is going on around me. Rather, I choose to trust Him with my life as I trust the ultimate loving parent. While situations can be difficult- suffering, pain, anxiety, stress, loss- when I turn over my feelings to Him, I find that I can manage what comes down the pike. I realize that there is a bigger story going on- bigger than my individual one. When I look at life as part of the eternal timeline, I do not get so anxious about my current event.

2) Be prudent and wise: Take the necessary precautions (self-isolation if you are at-risk, hand washing, practice social distancing, staying as healthy as you can be- sleep, eat, exercise). If constant news and updates on COVID-19 is stressing you out, turn off the TV or radio. Listen to the news once a day. Or, if you feel that you want more information to allay fears- research information, using credible sources as well as multiple ones (for balance). God has created wonderful researchers, scientists, doctors and health care workers. Science is a beautiful, God-created order and we are wise to explore and learn.

3) Look out for others and be a blessing to those around you. It warms my heart to see through social media- I have noticed through the Next Door neighbor groups- individuals asking if anyone needs assistance and reminding their neighbors to look out for the elderly. One thing we can do-simply, why not smile more? It is easy to scowl and frown when we are worried, but what if we tried the opposite? Others can still your smile at six feet.

What are you doing about COVID-19? Do you feel anxious? Are you worried? Are there any good things that you see coming from this event? How can you promote peace and calm in your household?

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