When you are in a meeting or group situation, have you ever noticed the dynamics? How some people take center stage and never move from it? How people can fawn over those they think are the big wigs?

But what about those on the sidelines, not in the spot light? Do you even notice them? Have you ever taken time to get to know them?

As I have shared before, one of my favorite singers/songwriters is Amy Grant. One of the qualities I like about her is that she seems so levelheaded and stable. Of course, she is a public persona and sometimes a public persona can be wildly different in private. I would hope that is not the case.

Once in an interview I heard her share a perspective that keeps her sane. She declares that on a video shoot, the person getting the attention with the make-up, lighting and direction is not the most important person in the vignette. It is the person who prepares the food. For if the crew is hungry, they will be cranky and things won't go well- there will be fault with all that occurs and the process will take a lot longer than needed. The "star" might be fawned over but it is the person providing the care via the food who is truly the star.

I have recently joined a civic group. They provide many wonderful lectures on a variety of topics; history, art, politics, health, etc. But it is a group with its own dynamics and its own configurations; those who are in the "know", who are "successful" or who have deep family connections are the ones who are immediately fawned over. Not that these "alpha" members are bad people. Certainly they are interesting, engaging, polite and nice. But I have been observing the daily interactions and structure of the organization. And I have kept my eyes open for those who are on the "fringes"- those individuals who don't seem to be in the limelight.

These individuals whom I have met, have been wonderful- so many interesting women with a variety of backgrounds, careers, hobbies. It is certainly been worth it to take the time to get to know the ones who on first blush might not seem to be the most interesting. I have found them to be just as interesting, engaging, polite and nice as the "alpha" members.

I have read that the late Princess Diana was very adept at looking for the person on the "outside" of a gathering and approaching him/her. They said it was due to her shyness that she naturally sought out those also were shy and on the fringes. It was one of her endearing characteristics that she approached others who might be overlooked and drew them in.

What about you? When you are in a group, where do you fit in? Are you the one, front and center or are you on the fringe? How do you feel when someone approaches you and takes an interest in what you do? Have you ever reached out to someone else? How did that go?

What situations or groups will you encounter today that you can be on the lookout for those who seem "unimportant"? Watch the dynamics of the group. Perhaps the one you think is "unimportant" is the one who is the most important of all.