There is a classic story about Mother Teresa and ethicist John Kavanaugh. Kavanaugh was questioning his future and was spending time with Mother Teresa in Calcutta. At one point he asked her to pray for him that he might achieve clarity in his decision.

“That I will not do,” she told him.

“I don’t understand. Why not?” he asked.

She smiled and said, “Clarity is the last thing you are clinging to and must let go of. I pray that you will have trust.”

Kavanaugh responded to her that he assumed she had always had clarity; that she always had known what she was supposed to be doing. To which Mother Teresa responded that she never had clarity; that all she had was trust.

Wow. One of the most dedicated persons to a life-long purpose and she never felt clear about her future. She could continue only because she believed in Someone who was reliable, good, honest and had her ultimate best in His hands. In other words, she trusted God.

I have been thinking a lot about that story recently. We are going through decisions in our family that at first blush seem to need clarity. But when I think about it- clarity is really for my own personal benefit of control. Clarity means that I can figure out what I am meant to do. Clarity means that I understand.

Rather, trust puts the sole business of who is in control into God’s hands, into the One who is reliable, good, honest and true.

Clarity: the quality of being easily understood; the quality of being expressed, remembered, understood, etc., in a very exact way; the quality of being easily seen or heard.

Trust: belief that someone or something is reliable, good, honest, effective, etc.

Abraham and his Sarah* tried to take future matters into their own hands especially when it seemed as if God wasn’t too clear about their future. Early on their life’s journey God had promised land for “all their offspring”. Just because they were getting up in years and didn’t have any children was no reason for them to doubt God, but doubt they did. Abraham tried saving his hide (really, you cannot have offspring if you are dead) by pawning off Sarah as his sister when they moved to Egypt. That choice of mistaken identity didn’t provide any clarity for the future. It just muddled the relationship with Pharaoh.

Later, Sarah decided that since this future “offspring” wasn’t happening any time soon between her and Abraham, she would have her female servant Haggai sleep with Abraham instead and that offspring would suffice. Unfortunately that offspring, Ishmael, complicated matters for that generation and beyond, muddling even today’s relationships between Jews and Muslims.

It wasn’t until Abraham took his journey up the mountain to sacrifice Isaac that we see it is not about clarity but trust. Abraham had no idea what God was going to do but he followed God’s direction. The instructions were clear yet they didn’t provide much in way of explanation: sacrifice your son on the mountain. As an only child, miraculously given to elderly parents who had only one shot fulfilling the “as many as the stars” progeny, it would have been reasonable for Abraham to ask God for a little clarity over the mission about sacrificing his son Isaac. Instead, Abraham trudged up the mountain and when little Isaac asks him where the sacrificial lamb was, Abraham responds that God will provide. Abraham had to trust that God was going to provide for him in that moment -either giving Abraham the strength to sacrifice his only son and provide another plan for a multitude of offspring or do something else. God did provide with the something else- a ram stuck in the thicket.

What about you? Have you ever prayed for clarity in a situation? What happened? Have you trusted in God regarding a situation? What happened? Did you ever see the unfolded whole picture? Or were things revealed slowly? What was your “something else”?

The interesting thing is that when I look back and think of the times that I prayed for clarity, they almost always required that I have some trust as I moved forward. Much time and energy was spent over trying to achieve clarity. If I had just started out with trust in the beginning, I would’ve been in such a better place.

Much as I would like to achieve clarity in some of these future decisions, I am willing to go with trust instead.

* At this point of Abraham and Sarah’s story, they are originally called Abram and Sarai. It was too confusing to use two different names for my retelling. (Reminds me of Russian literature- Why does Dostoevsky have to have names and nicknames for the same characters?) However, God renames them Abraham and Sarah when He gives them the covenant. Interestingly that happens before Abraham’s trust journey up the mountain. Abram didn’t have to “prove” his loyalty or obedience to be renamed, Abraham. Gives me comfort to know that I don’t have to prove to God my obedience before He has a relationship with me. He has already reached out and is waiting for me to trust Him. Of course, after I begin a relationship I want to trust God and align my plan and purpose with His plan.

Do what you say. Say what you mean. Mean what you do.

Shortly after our one son started working in his first “real” job post college he called up, “Why don’t people do their jobs?” he asked.

“Welcome to the adult world,” we replied.

Lately I have just about had it with the “adult world” of business- the adults who do not do their jobs-broken promises, zippo customer service, no accountability or follow through. It is a wonder if anyone wants to make a living much less make any money.

It just gets my goat when a business, to whom I plan on paying money, fails to arrange the details of said business (either a good or service) and appear that they do not even care about making money. For example, I am still waiting a call back from a local appliance store in response to my inquiry of a dryer that I am ready to purchase. In essence, give them money. I left a message for the sales department- over four weeks ago. I know that appliances are hard to get but just a phone call back with an explanation would be businesslike.

In contrast, at another local appliance store in response to an inquiry about their dryer, I was told that I would receive a call back in about ten minutes. And I did. I have also been apprised of the status of the appliance throughout the purchase process.

When I have good customer service, I am truly AMAZED. I am so excited that I am ready to give the salesperson a hug, an incredible tip, and tell the boss to give them a raise. But then I think, “Isn’t that the point of a business transaction? I give them money in exchange for a good or service? To answer the phone, call back when one says one will, find out the details for the logistics of the good or service? Isn’t that how business is done?

I know that I am not alone in my frustration. But where does it derive? I really don’t think it is because we, as a society, are so incredibly lazy and do not want to work. I hope not.

But we have probably witnessed the lack of accountability and follow through even outside of business, in our social networks, community engagements, volunteer efforts or family. I have heard many people say that having the instant communication of texting negates having to make definitive plans. It is easy to cancel plans as other more “interesting” are offered last minute. “That’s just how it is nowadays..” is the refrain.

Then again, I know folks who are like a badger with their responsibilities. Even upon the demise of personal health, they will not relinquish a commitment. Admirable sure, but is that healthy?

Or you hear those who sound like the elaborate proclamations or promises in film and books. “As God is my witness… I’ll never be hungry again.” (Scarlett O’Hara) It makes good drama but not real life.

So, what are we to do? How are we to navigate our words and actions? Do we commit to the point of death or never commit to anything?

As much I had drilled into me and I in turn, drilled into our boys about responsibility and commitments, admittedly, if I say I will do something, there is more of a chance that I won’t do it. I don’t know why it is but I have noticed that if I pre-announce an intention, it most likely won’t happen. Or at least not in the timeframe I stated. It is better for me to say nothing, carry on with the obligation and then afterwards, share what I did.

I think Jesus said it best. Jesus said, “Let your communication be, Yea, yea; Nay, nay”. [Matthew 5:37] There is a simplicity with the yes or no statements. He also reminds me that being accountable and responsible with my words and actions starts out simply. It is through small actions and promises kept that build a foundation of integrity. When larger, more involved vows and oaths are required, we are able because we have “muscle memory” of being honest and principled.

He wasn’t saying that one shouldn’t take an oath. Rather, to not make such an elaborate one that contains loopholes and lacks sincerity. Just say what you mean and mean what you say. Have clarity in your communication. Follow through with what is said. Hold yourself and others accountable.

What about you? Have you had enough of the “adult world” and its business? How are you with clarity of speech? With following through? With accountability? Are there things you said you would do? Have you done it? Are there commitments that you keep doing when it really isn’t necessary, helpful or even healthy? What sense of obligation do you have? Because of accountability or sentimentality?

One thing that I know I sometimes forget when I read about Jesus’ words and sayings- He doesn’t expect us to live those words in a vacuum. We are not alone in how we are to respond to them. We have the Holy Spirit to guide us and help us in our commitments and oaths. We have the Holy Spirit even, and especially, in our business practices.

Unfortunately, in today's world we have to be reminded that the power of an oath derives from the fact that in it we ask God to bear witness to the promises we make with the implicit expectation that He will hold us accountable for the manner in which we honor them. - Author: James L. Buckley