Efficiency
When I was little, I loved Cheaper by the Dozen and the stories of the Gilbreth family. Cheaper by the Dozen tells the life of Frank Gilbreth, his wife Lillian and their twelve children. Frank was a motion study researcher- looking at ways that one’s movements could be changed in order to speed up the process of rote activity, say bricklaying (where Frank began his ideas) . Using the new technology of motion pictures, he would film and then calculate various movements to ensure efficiency. He studied, developed and applied his theories on the home front much to the dismay of his children. He even “worked” when the children had their tonsils removed- setting up a surgical theater in the parlor in order to film the proceedings.
The idea of time study has always intrigued me: how can I do an activity or rote action faster and easier? In college, I dated a fellow who was studying engineering. In our first introduction, he was amazed that I knew anything at all about efficiency engineering, the debate between Frank Bunker Gilbreth and Frederick Winslow Taylor and time/motion study.
I have always been fascinated by workers who are efficient in their jobs: nursing assistants, plasterers, cooks, to name a few. People who with dexterity, quickness and assurance, perform their tasks with ease. In college I had a variety of jobs. Once, I worked in a nursing home and was in awe of the senior nursing assistants who could manage a heavy patient load- getting the residents bathed, dressed and into their chairs. The efficiency of their movements as they rolled patients, changed linens, tidied up the space was amazing to a fresh-faced young nursing student. (Of course, it didn’t take me long to realize that some of them just wanted to get the morning work over so they could sit down for the rest of their shift and have their cigarettes!)
At another job working in a deli/bakery, the baker was amazing. Patti, a slight woman but with strong arms, would deftly whip a spatula around a bowl, drop the doughy mass onto the counter and kneed it with such quick movements. In one or two movements with her hands, she would form the desired loaf and leave them to rise.
But for all this time saving movements, I wonder why save the time? Is there a “time bank”? The way we speak about time, one would think there is: one can lose or gain time, “time is money”, “time is of the essence”. Is time and efficiency the same thing? Is efficiency all it is cracked up to be?
I hate being inefficient. There is the maxim in business that you should only touch a piece of paper once: if you pick up a file, do something with it, don’t put it down and pick it up again. Same could be said with emails- once opened, either respond or delete.
Recently, we have had many projects going on in our household. Some things have to wait until others are completed. I am finding that we are in a “holding” pattern where we cannot do progress. This makes me nervous because I know that once, that which we are waiting becomes completed, a torrent of work needs to occur immediately. I am wondering while in this holding/waiting time if I am using my time wisely. I am finding that I am “touching the paper” more than once.
But some things cannot be rushed nor can they be a “once and done”. Instead of efficiency, much of life needs to be cultivated, similarly to gardening. Many actions in gardening are annual activities. There is no such thing as a finished garden. Repeated actions foster growth: breaking up or loosening the soil, repetitively going over a space, adding nutrients, removing weeds, watering, dividing plants.
I think of how we have to cultivate relationships. Our relationships are never “finished” if we are growing and learning together. Like gardening there are continual activities that help foster the growth: communicating, sharing meals, engaging in activities, helping each other, celebrating good times. I don’t think someone would want to have a once-and-done relationship. Sounds like an oxymoron. That is not a relationship but a transaction.
I think of inventions that took time (does that mean that the intervening years were “inefficient?): the can opener wasn’t invented until 45 years after cans were invented; the screw driver was invented hundreds of years after the invention of the screw; friction matches (as opposed to the flint and steel) were not invented until 1826, and the steering wheel was invented 8 years after the car.
What about you? Have you ever thought about efficiency? Where does it fit in your life? With everything that you do? Not at all? What do you cultivate? What in your life has taken time? Is that counter to being efficient?
The ongoing question I ask myself regarding efficiency and time- if I am so efficient with my time, what am I doing with the time I have “saved”? Am I spending time cultivating the things that God wants me too? Does that free me up to “do justice, love mercy, and walk humbly with God” (Micah 6:8)?
80/20
Do you feel that time is slipping away from you? Too much to do in too little time? Or, too much time and not enough to fill it?
The 80/20 Rule. Perhaps you have heard the saying as it applies to how people work- In any organization, 20% of the people do 80% of the work or some such thing.
The 80/20 rule is known as the Pareto principle or the law of the vital few, which basically means that in many events, 80% of the effects come from 20% of the causes.
Seems like there is a lot of 80/20 applied to living yet I wonder if we actually do it?
There is a financial lifestyle rule of 80/20 which divides living as such: 80% for expenses with the remainder 20% for saving (10%) and giving away (10%). Living within 80% of one’s means is liberating. By doing so, it allows room for financial confidence (through saving) and financial generosity. It provides some space for the financial unexpected both for ourselves and others.
I have been thinking- what if we lived all aspects of our lives like that? 80/20. Our time for instance? Instead of living crammed up to the minute with activity, we kept 20 % of time “open”? It would allow us wiggle room for the unexpected: the chat with the neighbor, the errand for a friend, the reading of a book, even the possible traffic delay.
What would it be like to not feel rushed every second of every day? I know that I am guilty of this behavior more times than I care to admit. No wonder I am pooped at the end of the day. What if I left some time for contemplation, reading, or day-dreaming?
There are twenty-four hours in a day: we know we should be sleeping @ 8 hours, leaving 16 hours for work and whatever. If we applied 20% of our time “open” that would give us @ 4.8 hours a day. Just writing that, makes me feel anxious- isn’t that “wasting” our precious time commodity? But, I am wondering if we could (more like, could I?) leave wiggle room throughout the course of a day? Not necessarily have 4.8 hours all in one block of time, rather leaving time in our schedule- starting with five minutes here, ten minutes there- to be open to interruptions, new possibilities and the unexpected?
Many years ago I heard Dan Buettner talk about Blue Zones (book by the same name). These are places in the world that he discovered had populations that lived longer and healthier lives. One such place is in Okinawa, Japan. In Okinawa the average life expectancy for males is 84 and for females is 90. Consider that in America, the average life expectancy for males is 75 and for females is 80/81, it seems that these folks might be onto something.
One of the principles that the Okinawa population practices (especially the elders) is to say, “hara hachi bu” before each meal. The expression reminds them to eat until they are 80% full. The point is to not starve themselves but to re-frame the way they look at food. In America, we say we eat until we are full. In Okinawa they say they eat until they are no longer hungry. While both actions provide needed nutrients, the Okinawa philosophy is slightly different: food consumption is not to be maximized but rather “wiggle” room. They utilize three simple rules with eating: they eat slowly (allows the brain to register when they are no longer hungry), they focus on the food (an enjoyment and mindfulness of what they are eating alongside with whom they are dining), and they use smaller plates.
The idea of the 80/20 principle for anything in life has me wondering if that rule allows for accomplishment or completeness. For it seems by definition anything 80%, will never be 100% complete.
Yet, I also think of the Sabbath: 6/7 days work and 1/7 rest: 85.7% work and 14/3% rest within a week. A God-devised system of roughly 80/20. Part of the purpose of Sabbath is that we, as humans need it. We are physically designed to need to rest and regroup- to not push the limits all the time, every time. I am thinking of Sabbath not in any legalistic way (one is forbidden to turn on a light switch because it is “work”), but rather as a practical concept.
It is the practice of sabbath living that strengthens our physical, mental and spiritual beings. We know that we need physical rest. Much as we try to be efficient with our schedules and lifestyles, we cannot change the fact that our physical bodies recover, re-generate and renew through rest and sleep. Even when we are awake, we need periods of time when our minds are “off” to allow our brains to be de-stimulated.
Sabbath living is also good for our faith. In practicing a Sabbath lifestyle, we will never be able to finish a full 7/7 week, and so we must believe and trust God that all will and can be complete during the 6/7 time. It is as if the incompleteness is the point of Sabbath: it is a system that forces one to let go of self-sufficiency and to allow God’s generosity/wiggle room to orchestrate our time.
It appears that 20% of what we do whether financially, scheduling or in our eating habits- the “giving away” of our time or money, the resting, or the refrain from eating until we are stuffed- are the causes that effects the 80% of our lives in better physical, mental and spiritual practices.
What about you? Do you pack your days so that you do not have any time for thought or reflection? Do you eat until you are stuffed? Have you ever practiced a sabbath? If so, what does it look like?
I am very intrigued by the 80/20 rule as it applies to my schedule. I am trying to have time each day that is my “sabbath” for rest and for wiggle room. Time for the unexpected. Time to be healthy. Time for God to work in my life. Time to enjoy being alive.
Spaciousness
The vastness of the ocean…
What have you learned this past year? Anything? Or has this year been one of endurance- just get through it? Have you spent anytime in reflection? Has anything become important to you? Health? Time? Family? Friends? Faith?
The other Sunday I heard a poet being interviewed on Krista Tippett’s On Being. It was a rebroadcast from an earlier show. The poet was using a word she had heard from a Japanese student: yutori- meaning living with spaciousness. The whole concept of the word is to live life in the moment and not be rushed or pressed for time. An example of yutori is when you leave early to get somewhere in order that once there, you can have time to look around. Yutori is an intentionality to our schedule that allows us to be present and not rushed. In essence- to give yourself wiggle room.
The concept of living with spaciousness resonated with me. I need to remember it especially during this transition of moving out of isolation/Covid time into a new “normal”. I view my life with the demarcation of pre-Covid, rushed and feeling that I did not have any time and Covid, a feeling that time is not rushed at all. This past year, I have found it is easy to lose track of time when there are no set appointments or schedules. I have no clue to the day of the week, much less what day of the month it might be. In fact, I am hesitant to go back to any pre-Covid type of schedule and am anxious to have re-gatherings. Not so much for any type of contagion but rather the fear of being sucked into the vortex of the tyranny of the urgent and all things that scheduling appointments, meetings, and gatherings entail.
One of the blessings of the Covid shut-down is that I have had to slow down. I didn’t realize how much my schedule was packed until it no longer was. I have had time for reflection and thinking.
I have been thinking that I would like to extend the concept of living with spaciousness to more than just my day planner. I would like to experience spaciousness in my thoughts, my time, my actions and to some extent, my physical surroundings. It is interesting that Covid has brought not just a halt to our schedules but also provided us with the physical reminder of buffers. For just like we need to distance ourselves to remain healthy, we need the idea of distancing with our thoughts, actions and even physical surroundings- to give ourselves space to thrive. It is in those spaces that we give ourselves latitude to plan, to dream, to build relationships, and to live into our purpose.
For me, I find writing in a journal the best way to buffer my thoughts. I can remove the “stuff” that is swirling in my brain and leave room for other ideas to take shape. It is through the journal that I can lay out my future plans and give myself time and space before enacting them.
I also find that when I have physical space- lack of clutter around me, I can concentrate better. Perhaps you have noticed, many are de-cluttering during this time. Whether intentional or just following society’s home improvement trend, it is not a bad idea. It is literally providing spaciousness in one’s home/office which can also be incorporated for post-Covid living. Providing “distance” with our belongings lets us see what we have and to decide what we need and don’t need.
I like one of the explanations to needing to declutter- If you have to move things around to accomplish a task at home or office or feel overwhelmed by all your things, then you might want to think about de-cluttering and adding some “space” to your physical space. Of course, now that whole households- work spaces and school rooms- are under one roof, de-cluttering may take on a whole different meaning and form. The psychology of clutter can be tied to procrastination- sorting and tossing out an item can be unpleasant to people and avoided at all costs. The more things pile up, the more out of control one feels and the more one avoids the inevitable. But, the benefits of tackling clutter can outweigh those inertia feelings.
I also like the idea of building space into our schedules. In the pre-Covid time management plan, it would be suggested to add travel time in-between meetings. But, with teleworking, it still is important to place time blocks into our days. Our son is taking medical school classes online. He says many of the professors go over the allotted class time because they think the students don’t have to move from one classroom to anther. With everything back to back, they have no time to digest what is being taught much less shift papers around before the next barrage of information is given.
But we could practice implementing travel time into our schedules. If one “arrives” early for a meeting or gathering (even if it is social), there is time to take a deep breath, think about what is going to happen, perhaps say a prayer or two before engaging in conversation or activity. Maybe before any interaction we should always take some time to say a mantra, quote or Bible verse. Even if it is just a reminder to “choose to be kind” before we enter into a new situation.
I think one of the true tenets of living with spaciousness is in providing space for others to grow. It might mean that we give others space to make mistakes as well as space to succeed. Living with spaciousness is not just in how we manage our time but in how we give others room to be the best version of themselves.
What about you? What lessons from Covid have you learned? Anything you want to continue in the post-Covid world? How are you with your time? Do you live with spaciousness? If so, what does that look like?
Yutori is also defined as “a state with sufficiency and ease”. I don’t know about you, but that sounds like a good state of mind to me.
Teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom. (Psalm 90:12)
Your Phone IS calling…
Last week I heard a brief segment on NPR about the distracting pull of our smart phones. The statement didn’t surprise me since it validates my own and other’s observed behaviors.
The bane of modern life…
After all, it seems intuitive- the mere presence of our phones beckons us to keep checking it. Not only when we have a beep, ring or tone that alerts us to a new notification but even when it is silent. We check and double check thinking that we must “See if something is going on.” “Did we miss a text?” and even thinking, “It must be broken since I didn’t get anything.”
After hearing the story, I commented to my husband, “No one sits by their land line and keeps picking it up to see if there is someone on the other end.” Of course as I was speaking I was reminded of comedy skits where that is exactly what happens. The protagonist is waiting for an important call and sits by the phone. Every once in a while she will pick up the phone to see if someone is there. In the real old skits, the person on the other line is usually the telephone operator who will patiently explain that no one has called. (For those who aren’t familiar, back in the day- there were party lines. No such thing as direct calling. One had to speak to the operator. “Operator, get me ‘AMherst 355’ and the operator would connect you. Sometimes you had to wait to be connected and so the operator would ring you back with the connection.)
These social scientists realized that even though their phones were parked beside them and not making any noise, they still felt compelled to check them to ensure that they hadn’t missed a call.
I started thinking about my own practice with the cell phone. I, too am guilty of checking the phone for truly no reason. Although in fairness to me, I have missed calls. Either because I put my phone on silent and forgotten to return it to sound when I was expecting a call. Or it is deep in the bowels of my purse and I cannot hear it ringing or if I do, it takes me forever to unearth it. Just when I do the ring stops.
I find that having the phone next to me while working is distracting. I find myself checking to see messages and emails which is exactly what they discovered in their rudimentary experiment. The closer in proximity a smart phone was to a person, the more likely and the more frequent he would look at the phone.
Of course, time management suggests that one batches emails and phone calls at various times during the day. That is an admirable plan. One in which I try to adhere. Still, over the last fifteen years, because of caring for aging parents, I found that I needed to have the phone close. It would never fail that the times that I would forget my phone, have it charging in another room or have it on silence, would be the one time that I would receive an important phone call about their care.
There is something about out of sight, out of mind though that I find appealing. In some ways, by not having the phone in eye shot, it gives me permission to not be burdened by the information through the various forms of communication. For truly, if I analyze the information that I am reading, most of it is not that time sensitive.
It also gives me permission to really concentrate at the task on hand. I can control when I look and when I respond to various messages. It allows me to feel that I accomplished something rather than being harried and beholden to a text, email or message that doesn’t move me closer to completing the task.
I am also giving myself permission to analyze my time this week. I have started keeping track of my days: what I have done with each hour or so. I am looking for patterns of productivity and misuse. Is there something that seems to be taking larger chunks of my time? What is it? And why is it? Is there margin in my schedule? Times of down time? Time for self-care? For care of others? How many times am I checking my phone?
If you wonder where your time is going, you might want to try a time study. You can use your day planner, or just a sheet of paper. [ Of course, the irony of a time tracker app on one’s phone isn’t wasted on me! It is tempting to suggest it though. ] Or, you can download templates. Click here to download either an excel or word time sheet.
I am just using a piece of paper. For each day, I group my time into either hourly sections or into the amount of time it takes me to do an activity. (e.g. tennis= 2 1/2 hours with playing and traveling to and from time.) So far I haven’t found any patterns but I have realized that my days are packed. No wonder I fall asleep so quickly.
What about you? What is your relationship with your phone? Do you keep it in sight during your waking hours? What do you do about meal times? Meetings? I have heard that by putting the phone on the table for meetings or meals is the equivalent of setting other people at the table. Do you want them there or not?
996
I have always loved rocks and stones. Here are three stones (like my “logo”) to remind us of balance and priorities. For me it is faith, family, friends.
Have you heard of the new working model for time at the office? No longer “nine-to-five” or 24/7 but 996: twelve hour days (9am-9pm), six days a week.
According to the head honchos at Alibaba and Tesla, long work hours are a necessity for company growth and success. Alibaba’s founder, Jack Ma wrote on a Weibo post, “To be able to work 996 is a huge bliss...If you want to join Alibaba, you need to be prepared to work 12 hours a day, otherwise why even bother joining,” He has also encouraged young people to work more than forty hours a week, until the government pointed out that working employees over a forty hour/week is against the law. Yet he has also been known to say, “ I'm coming to this world not to work. I want to come to this world to enjoy my life. I don't want to die in my office. I want to die on the beaches.” Seems like he is a little confused over his work/life balance.
Tesla’s Mr. Musk has scoffed at those people who think forty hours/week can contribute anything to society. He is an advocate of long working days. “Nobody has ever changed the world on forty hours a week.” He advocates people to work 80-100 hours a week.
There has also been controversial employment practices at Amazon. According to a New York Times’ insider report, “Many of those workers said Amazon had provided them with great work opportunities and found its boldness and inventiveness addictive. But they also said the culture at Amazon seemed almost punishing by design, and described a workplace characterized by frequent criticism, often excessive workloads and expectations the company itself calls ‘unreasonably high.’ “ Those who had worked for the company and have left describe their feelings as similar to the soldier or civilian who has witnessed battle and has come through it: a pride in going through hell and surviving yet glad it is over.
In all these companies, working longer does not allow for any type of work/life balance. If anything, there is a total imbalance. Zhou Hongyi, the chairman and chief executive of Internet security firm Qihoo 360, said striking the right balance was an impossible task.
Speaking at a media briefing last week, he said, “I’ll call you my big uncle if any of you seated here can say you truly balance family and work,” . (Referring to someone as “big uncle” – or da ye in Chinese – is a mark of great respect.)
However, there are other working models ones that seem to have more of a balance between work and life. According to the World Happiness Monitor (who knew?), the countries with the happiest people seem to be the ones who have this balance in order. They work forty or fewer hours a week and have a livable wage in order to spend time with family and friends when not working. Granted these are companies in countries that have a different set-up for health care, childcare and other employer and employee-type expenses. Do these countries have a lower expectation of what constitutes happiness? (https://www.cnn.com/travel/article/worlds-happiest-countries-united-nations-2019/index.html)
Is it only in the innovative companies and environment that we push ourselves over the limit? Do we have to subjugate our individual desires/needs/happiness for the greater good of company/innovation/advancement of society? Are we advancing society when we push the limits at all costs? Does that strategy backfire in the long-term of society or does it propel it forward?
I guess it comes down to what you want out of life? What do you feel is important? What is your purpose? Are you answering a higher calling or a greater good other than yourself?
At this stage of my life, I do find that I am questioning how I spend my time. Does it serve a purpose beyond myself? Does the activity align with my goals which I try to align with God’s calling?
In Ephesians 5: 16, Paul reminds us to “make the most of every opportunity”. Of course all scripture can be used for any and opposite arguments (making the most of every opportunity could mean for some to work ALL the time). The intention is that we make the most of our days- to live out our lives to benefit God and others. The Psalmist says, “Teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom.” I think that when we recognize our priorities for our time, we do gain wisdom.
Here are some tips found online regarding work-life:
1. Prioritize what’s important to you and let go of everything else. That is where my three stones come in. I have three stones in my office that remind me of my priorities: faith, family, friends. Stephen Covey would use the visual of filling a jar with stones, pebbles, sand and water. He would ask his audience in which order to fill the jar with all fitting and nothing spilling. In order to get all the solids and liquids in, one has to first put in the big rocks. Those are your priorities each day. Although lately, I have been wondering about my third “big rock”-friends and if, for the sake of analogy, I might need to trade that one for two smaller sized rocks. I am in the midst of reprioritizing. Another blog….
2. Pursue activities and opportunities that energize you. Frederick Buechner’s quote helps keep this point grounded for me: “ Vocation is the place where our deep gladness meets the world's deep need.” While there are some activities and opportunities that energize me, they may not necessarily be ones that encourage others and glorify God.
3. Set your own boundaries (no one will do it for you). This has been one of the hardest things for me to learn. It makes me feel incredibly selfish yet I recognize that I have to be the one who does it.
4. Embrace work-life integration. Trying to compartmentalize work and life separately can sometimes cause more stress. Depending on your job, you might have to have some overlap. Setting overlapping boundaries can sometimes take the stress out but also keep from both work-life melding into one mess. This one may take time as you assess how the balance is working.
The fact is- we all get twenty-four hours a day, one hundred sixty-eight hours in a week to accomplish whatever…
What about you? How will you spend it?
Finish
I have written before about my need to finish: finish my tennis stroke, finish reading a book, finish a project, etc. For some reason the idea of finishing never translated to the finishing of my time spent volunteering or outside responsibilities. When I would be asked if I could serve on this committee or help out with that event I generally say, "sure". I would just add that request to whatever else I was doing. It just occurred to me that I need to finish any volunteer work before I say yes to start any new endeavor.
Has that ever happened to you? You go along, being asked for this or that and you say yes because no one request requires much in the way of time or money. But at some point when all the demands start to add up, the collective investment is exhausting.
The other day, I had listed all the items that I needed to do for the various committees I am on. It turns out that I have five major responsibilities with at least four to five "to-do" check offs under each one. The check-offs require me to create or perform some type of job and they are items that take a fair amount of time.
No wonder I was feeling overwhelmed.
I remember years ago a friend shared with me that when her grandchild was at a Montessori school, part of their teaching was that the child learned not to take out another play items, puzzle or activity before putting back the one he was using.
What a concept! I need to practice that with my time requests. For some reason the requests to email individuals about a volunteer offering, schedule a rotation chart, design policies and procedures for an ongoing committee, write the curriculum and teach a five week class (among other requests) don't seem too demanding at first and don't seem to warrant a careful consideration when initially asked. These are easy things for me to do.
Yet easy or not it is the time involved that has me feeling as if every toy is out in the room and I have no way to put any of it back.
It seems as if every six months I need to reevaluate what I am doing, to finish what I started and to build in breaks from one obligation to the next. I used to practice this method of time management but over the last year, life and its demands have me scrambling around. I know that I don't want to just resign or walk away without a clean and clear break of obligations.
What about you? Do you feel the pressure of too many demands on your time? Are they things that you want to do? Are they things that have just happened? How do you manage requests for your time and talent? Do you finish what you started or do you just quit? What choices can you make that would give you some margin with your time?
How can you practice putting away one toy before getting out another?
Pay Yourself. First.
Do you ever feel frustrated that the things that you need to do in order to stay sane, happy and balanced seem to get relegated to the bottom of the to-do list and ultimately not done?
Lately I have been experiencing that. Certainly we all have experienced temporary crises when we need to focus on matters at hand and we have to let things slide. But when it becomes a lifestyle and the mode of daily operations, there is a problem.
I was reminded by a dear friend to remember to take time to do what I need to do to bring me joy.
First.
It reminded me of the financial advice that one should "pay oneself first, before you pay any other expenses." The idea is that one should put away an amount in savings first and then use the remainder for expenses. If you try financial planning the other way around, saving whatever is left over after expenses, then you will never have amounted much savings. We may be well-intentioned to save but unless we do it first it won't happen.
I think we need to practice that same discipline with our time. First we need to do what is important to us before the time gets snatched away with other matters. Due to various circumstances, it may not be the length of time we want or the mode and mean of our plans. Nonetheless we have to faithfully keep plugging away at what is important to us. Preserve that time, action or deed.
For me the two things that I feel I must do is read my Bible/pray and write. When I don't, I get cranky, depressed and overwhelmed. I get angry with myself for not guarding my time and disappointed over the time "lost" to other endeavors.
When I am able to do those two items daily, my days seem to flow smoothly. I am reasonable, understanding and I am sure as my family can attest, much more pleasant to be around. Some days, I know that I won't be able to spend too much on either activity but a little time goes a long way. Just doing a couple of minutes makes a hectic day seem less crazy.
What about you? Have you ever paid yourself first? In time or finances? What did/does that look like for you? If you are in a place when you cannot pay yourself? Why not? What can be loosened up or rearranged so that you can do so?
The airplane oxygen mask analogy has become a cliche to explain the point of first caring for oneself. (Oxygen Mask Rule: "Should the cabin lose pressure, oxygen masks will drop from the overhead area. Please place the mask over your own mouth and nose before assisting others.” Reason being- there will be no time to help anyone without your mask. Falling from over 30,000-40,000 feet altitude would cause you to pass out within 15-20 seconds if you do not have your oxygen mask on. )
Yet in essence, paying yourself first in time or money is the practical way one can care for oneself and not experience the helplessness of no savings or no time. If we cannot save enough money to bring about financial peace or cannot do the things that bring us joy then we are existing not living.
If I want to live joyfully then I have to pay myself. First.
If You Have the Time.... Do It
I know that I have written about time management in many posts. But it seems to be a topic that all of us need reminding. Or rather, a reminder for me. As is typical of life, situations have occurred which underscore the adage, "practice what you preach"!
When I first started in my nursing career, I learned pretty quickly that if there was time to do something "extra" in my duties, e.g. straightening up a patient's room where medical supplies were kept, then do it right then. If not, some crisis or urgent matter would soon occur and that opportunity would be lost.
In my home life I have had similar situations. If there is time and opportunity to work on a home project, I need to do it. If not, then it seems as if I will never get back to it. One day I had some time to work on a simple fixing of a kitchen screen. (Remove the molding around the wood, pull the screen a little tighter., staple in place,reattach the molding and touch up paint on the molding strip.) Not a big deal. I just didn't feel like doing that project then. No apparent reason. I had all the materials and tools I needed. I had the time and I knew what to do. I just didn't do it. That was three years ago.
I have done it with relationships. Times when all I needed to do was to send a card, an email or a quick phone call. And I didn't do it. I just didn't feel like it. The opportunity of building or cementing a relationship was lost and it is difficult to capture that time again.
It has happened with my work schedule. In this new endeavor of writing my time is spent differently than my previous 9-5 job. I still have a schedule for writing and gathering information and research, but there is some internal and external flexibility. However, just when I think I have some "extra" time it is quickly taken by urgent demands of family.
I think of all the time I have wasted. Sure, I do not think time with others in relationship is wasted but I have wasted it in other ways- "research" on internet, youtube videos, etc.
I could've been using my time more wisely and judiciously.
Past history that it is, I should've realized that I always get pulled into situations that will take me from what I am currently doing and I need to be prepared for that.
I would've been prepared for the distractions if I would've done what I intended at the time when it occurred.
Just like I am kicking myself for not saving more money (see post Finances 101- February 22, 2017) I am kicking myself for not using my time more wisely, for not doing what I intended to do and getting waylaid with frivolous, non-productive work.
What about you? Do you ever feel that you have missed opportunities? Times when you could've, should've, would've done things but you didn't? And now, you can't go back? What have you learned? Acceptance of things not done? Guilt over those things hanging over your head? Plans to change that behavior?
I need to (re)learn- if there is time to do something...do it.
Ash Wednesday
In the Christian tradition, Ash Wednesday starts the beginning of forty days before Easter (not counting Sundays). It is a time of remembrance and repentance; self-denial, moderation, fasting, and the forsaking of sinful activities and habits. It is during this time we are called to remember our sin and prepare for the coming Christ. The ashes (burnt ashes from the previous year's palms from Palm Sunday) are placed on the forehead, "Remember you are dust and to dust shall you return." in the sign of a cross. (Reminder of the redeemed future with God through Christ.)
I’ve always liked the time divisions in the Christian calendar. Whether you are a Christian or not, there is something manageable about the forty days. It is enough time to accomplish something but short enough time to offer variety.
It seems as if forty days are a good chunk of time to accomplish something. I notice this every time I get my hair cut. My hairdresser always makes sure that I schedule my next hair cut before I leave the one I am having. I go every eight weeks. Many times as I leave I think, “Oh, by then I hope to have accomplished thus and such...” Sometimes I hit the mark. Other times I need to reevaluate. Regardless, I feel that the time is doable. I don’t get overwhelmed.
Traditionally the time of Lent (Ash Wednesday- Maundy Thursday) is usually a time of giving up and sacrifice as a symbol of Christ’s sacrifice for us. The sacrifice is usually one of tangible pleasure- certain foods or activities.
But what about a sacrifice of time? Giving up your time in one activity in order to take time for another activity? For the secular world, forty days is a doable amount to sustain a new habit. What new habits do you want in your life? Can you commit to practicing it over the next forty days?
Suggestions:
- Giving up looking at Facebook in order to visit with a friend- a relational habit
- Giving up running out to “pick up something to eat” (which always takes longer than you think) in order to plan menus for sit down dinners at home- a healthy eating and financial habit
- Giving up watching Netflix for reading a book suggested from a book club-an intellectual habit
- Giving up watching the news on television in order to listen to a different news source on the internet/radio-an intellectual habit
- Giving up your personal gym time for scheduled walking with a friend-a relational and financial habit
What about you? How do you treat the Lenten season? Do you give up or take on something for Lent? Have you ever thought about forty days as a good chunk of time to try something new?
It's About Time
Lately with all the busy-ness of my life, I haven't had a chance to tackle any of my winter project lists. The other day I thought I need to get on it and so I set the timer for 15 minutes and knocked off one item on the list.
I know that I have talked about timers before but they really are helpful. It gives you permission for a specific time to do whatever you need to get done. And it gives you permission to stop what you are doing and to move on to something else.
In January's issue of Real Simple, they had an article of things to do if you have 5 minutes, or an hour or one weekend. The idea is that you have a go-to place of things that can be accomplished when you find you have a little extra time. You are able to work towards a goal yet not have to a large chunk of time in order to complete it.
I keep lists on my desk of things that take approximately fifteen minutes or less. Whenever I get a little block of time, I try and check off one of those items.
For example:
- straighten out a couple of dresser drawers
- sew on a button from my mending pile
- organize a pantry shelf
- sort out linen closet
- sort out hall closet
- weed a garden bed
- return a phone call
- send out an email
- get out tools for larger project
What about you? Do you have a never ending "to- do" list? Do you ever wonder when and if you will get around to it? Have you ever used a timer to accomplish a smaller list? Can you break down your long "to-do" list into fifteen or thirty minute projects? Will you give yourself permission to work on a project for that amount of time and when the timer dings, you put it aside?
If you have never used a timer before I would challenge you to try it. It's about time.
Three Choices
Money. Time. Friends. If you could, would you want more money, time or friends in your life?
Recently I was part of a discussion with that question. At first blush I would say of course, I could use all three; more money to help those who need it, more time to do the things that I want and more friends to share in the activities.
But the more I thought about it I realized that I do have all the money, time and friends that I need. I just haven't spent it well, used what I have been given efficiently or enjoyed the relationships more. If I am honest I wouldn't do any better with more of it. In fact I would just abuse any excess.
It made me think that I need to refocus and rethink how I am spending my money, my time and my friendships. What is really necessary? Where can I focus my time better? Am I frittering away the money and hours with senseless items and activities? Can I use that time and money better with my friends? Do I take the time to be with my friends? Do I cultivate relationships? Do I share in activities that build up trust and community?
What about you? Do you need to rethink how you spend your money, time and friends? Do you have enough of all three or could you use more? What would you give up in order to have more?
What are your three choices?
Time Spent
I can't say that things are settled or "back to normal" in our household following the death of my mom. We are still reeling with the reality of her not being with us. But we are trying to figure it out.
I am having difficulty getting my schedule together. Initially in the first few days we were in emergency mode; things scheduled or planned had to be postponed. The focus was on my dad and what needed to be done. Part of that scheduling was dictated by how my dad felt- did he need one of us to stay over, spend the day with him, etc? He is still very raw with his grief but he is wanting to have some space and time alone which we want to give him.
I try to contact or see him every day. But looking forward I am noticing that I have a week coming up where I won't be able to see him for about five days and I am feeling anxious about it. How can I rearrange things to be there? How did these things creep in when I was trying to have an open schedule?
I think part of it happened because I don't have a set time on the calendar for my visits with my dad. I know that eventually we will but for now we are still in the "this is new territory for us" and "we shall see how each day goes" mode. When my mom was alive, I would see the folks at least every other week for scheduled outings. We would also check in with one another every three days or so.
It reminds me that if we don't schedule regular time with one another, it does not happen. Oh sure, we can have the spontaneous, "Hey, what are you doing for lunch today?" gathering but generally we don't. They say nature abhors a vacuum. I think in our modern culture, schedules abhor a blank space. We will spend our time in a variety of unproductive ways that don't accomplish our overall plans if we are not diligent and intentional about how we spend out time.
I have noticed that if things are not purposely planned, we end up with a "full schedule" of activities that just appear. If we want to spend time with someone it is generally with any "leftover" time. It is almost if we think if I have time after I do such and such, then I will visit. Truthfully, when does that really happen?
I have also noticed that many approach our time with God the same way. Only when we have time "left over" we might pray or read the Bible. Lately I have changed my daily schedule in that reading the Bible and praying is the first thing that I do upon waking. Once I do that, it seems as if the rest of my day falls into place. It is doing the first thing, the important thing- first.
Going forward with my dad, I know that once we have a set schedule, ie. visits every Monday, then I can fill in the rest of my time with the activities and obligations that I need and want to do. When I intentionally have a regular plan with our visits, the rest will fall into place. Plus I will have the added benefit of knowing that I did the important thing first.
What about you? Do you find your time being spent in ways which aren't productive? Do you find that you can never schedule time to see and visit the people with whom you want? Have you ever spent your time first scheduling the important items and then filling in with other activities? How did that go? Does your time get spent without your input or do you spend your time wisely? How is your time spent?
Do the Hard Thing First
Over the weekend we went bicycling around town. My husband wanted to show me and our home-for-spring-break son a new bicycle path. It was a lot of fun and as always, we get to see our city in a different light when riding on the back of a bike.
The twenty mile trip was a large loop- heading south from our home, then turning west, heading north and then east back to home. When we traverse east and west we have to navigate a fairly large hill. There is no way round. The only choice is which way round: either a very long, fairly gradual uphill climb or a shorter, steeper version. The guys opted for the shorter, steeper version and did very well climbing it. I climbed it too but not on the bicycle. My bike and I had a nice walk up the hill.
We have done a similar route in the past, but it doesn't include traversing this large hill. When we do the flatter version, about 2 miles from our home I am ready to return. I am tired and have had it. Today, when we came to the same area where I usually am fatigued I thought this is no problem. After traversing those other hills, this is a piece of cake. I had done the hard cycling already and so when I came to an area that was difficult but not as difficult as what I had just done, I was prepared and could do it.
In time management circles they always suggest that one does the hard task, the task that you keep putting off, first. Yesterday I definitely saw why that is.
- You get it out of the way. When you know something is inevitable I find the anticipation is worse than the actuality.
- It makes everything that comes afterward so much easier. It puts things in perspective; everything after the hard task seems like a piece of cake even if in the past that "piece of cake" experience was once the hard thing.
- You experience such a relief. There is a collective sigh that one can move on to something else.
What about you? Do you have to accomplish something difficult that you keep delaying? Is it something for work or is it personal? Is it weighing on your mind? Why not try and scratch that activity off your to-do list by tackling it first thing in the morning? Commit to getting the hard thing done first and you may experience a lightness of being the rest of the day. What do you have to lose?
Voices
Ever have the battle between two voices in your head? This is not the schizophrenic, "One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest" type of voices but just the little things we tell ourselves that generally trip us up. They are the voices of two differing opinions.
For instance, I have either the Nike "Just Do It" or Scarlett O'Hara's voice "tomorrow is another day", clammering in my head especially when I have tasks that I am not too keen on beginning.
In my immediate family this head battle appears to be played out especially in the realm of straightening and putting away household items. There is the battery operated bicycle reflector that hasn't quite made it to the basement for a fresh battery. There are the piles of extra Christmas cards that are making the room rounds. There is the bag of to-be-recycled wine corks that are on their way to their final destination (back to the wine store) yet has somehow moved from kitchen to basement to bedroom.
Scarlett's mindset is winning.
In 2016 I plan on being more determined to finish what I start, when I start it.
Many years ago when I worked on a very busy and stressful oncology floor in the hospital I learned that if I had time to do some task, e.g. straighten a room for the next admission, I better do it when I thought about it. If not, the time and thought would be long gone due to the next pressing event taking its place. When I didn't accomplish something when I thought about it, I would regret the time lost.
So many times I have not felt like straightening up only to have someone stop by unexpected or I am asked about an item at the bottom of one of my floating piles. Either way I am caught unawares and realize that had I only taken care of what I needed to do at the time it needed to be done, I wouldn't feel frazzled.
I have heard that one of the Montessori school program tenets is to encourage children to learn how to pick up after themselves. If a preschooler gets out another toy, he/she has to put away the first toy with which he/she was playing.
Clean up after yourself as you go along. Not a bad philosophy.
Some time management/organizing gurus suggest taking fifteen minutes each day to put away miscellaneous and stray items. Keep a basket on each floor of your home. Anything that is found during the day that is not in its normal place and needs to be returned to its "home" is placed in the basket. At a specific time during the day (before dinner or bedtime) take fifteen minutes to return the items to its proper location.
Next time I will unlock the basement door, open it and put the recycling into its container rather than walking past the pile of papers on the floor by the door. All it takes is a few extra seconds to be done and finished. Why, I don't do it at the time, I have no idea.
What about you? Any small, niggling tasks that you tell yourself "tomorrow is another day" and you will start tomorrow? How long has that conversation been exchanged? What is preventing you? Is the task overwhelming? Would doing one small thing get you started? Are you too tired to start?
What refrains are playing through your head?