Notes to Older Self

"What would you tell your younger self?"   There is an anthology by Ellyn Spragins, What I Know Now: Letters to My Younger Self.   It includes stories and vignettes from Maya Angelou, Madeleine Albright, Queen Nor and a host of other remarkable women.

I have seen self-help books that are in essence, "notes to my younger self".  Mostly it is "non-preachy" way for someone to give another advice:  "These are the lessons learned from my rash younger self and I need to pass along these words of wisdom to you, foolish young person."  Definitely there is some truth in these type of books and it would be wise to heed or to at least consider the words given.

The idea of writing about the past is not a bad idea.  It is probably good to lay to rest any of the demons, troubles, regrets, guilts and pleasures of what might trip us up in our current journey.

 Although, I am in a place in life where I want to write notes to my older self.  Things I vow that I will and will not do as I age:

• Remain curious about my surroundings and the people around me
• Be considerate of others
• Go with the flow
• Continue to exercise or at least just move
• Focus on what I can do rather than what I cannot
• Allow my loved ones to make their own mistakes
• Don't offer advice (even through a carefully worded, "Notes to Younger Self") without having been asked

What about you?  Have you ever thought about writing a note to your younger self?  What advice would you give him/her?  What about writing a note to your older self?  What things do you want to ensure that you do as you age?  What things do you not want to do? 

One Hand

This week I committed the cardinal sin of kitchens. I placed a sharp cutting knife in the soapy dishwater and forgot about it.  Only when I was washing the dishes did I come upon it- by slicing the tip of my left-hand, middle finger.  

Yikes.  Talk about blood. God love my "faint upon seeing blood" husband. (He now has a sticker in his medical chart.  He must lie down with his feet preventively above his head when he gets labs drawn.  Too many times when he passed out giving a small vial to check his hemoglobin,etc.) 

Once I got the bleeding somewhat under control, he helped me put a butterfly bandage on it. He always amazes me.  He knows just what to do and does it.  Part of it comes from his first aid training in Boy Scouts.  In fact, he was the one who taught the class at Boy Scout camp.  I always wondered how did that work?  Didn't he faint as he taught the class?  "Purely theoretical", he replies.  (It is after the crisis is over, will he have to lie down and let the color return to his face.) 

I now have 2 butterfly bandages on my finger, plus a flexible fabric bandage to contain the antibiotic ointment and another knuckle bandage over top of it all.  It really extends my middle finger so that when I move my hand, I look like I am perpetually ticked off at everyone. (which some days describes my mood)

The thing is, having limited use of my left hand is a big annoyance.  It is just a small appendage, but I have to rethink what I am doing.  I don't want to get that hand wet because the soggy bandages have to be continually changed. I don't want to use it when I garden because I don't want dirt in my cut.  So many things I do, require that I use both hands and for the time being I can't.

"Two hands are better than one".  That is certainly an apropos adage. Two hands can provide strength, support, and symmetry. For us as individuals we need to have the balance of both sides.

It makes me thing that in the global sense, we need two hands;  we need the balance of both sides.  We need the strength, support and symmetry that comes when there is more than just one idea, one way of doing something, or one solution.

With my one handedness, I have to ask my husband to help.  I find that it is quite a bother because I am, as I have mentioned before, an independent cuss.  It is humbling to have someone else button a button or fix a clasp. 

But isn't that what we are asked to do?  Help others?  Give support?  Provide strength? Be humble? 

Just like we need two hands, we need one another. 

What about you?  Ever have trouble with your appendages?  Temporarily or permanently?  What did you learn with that experience?  

Perfect Day

Black-Eyed Susan from our yard.  Sadly, our shade prevents the sunflowers from blooming.  This is the closest yellow flower I have. 

Weather wise, today is a perfect day.  The air has finally lost its cloying stickiness of humidity but it does not have the crisp autumnal air yet.  It is as if the air is just in a mellow mood.

The sun is still bright and warm.  You don't have to look very hard to find the warm sunny spot as you have to do in the dead of winter. When I am outside, my skin feels the way it does on evenings after a day at the beach; the pleasant sensation of  cool evening breezes skimming over a taut somewhat sunburned face.  At this time of year, I don't need to wait until evening;  the day breeze immediately cools down my warmed skin.  I half expect to taste some salt on my lips. 

I love this transitional time between summer and fall weather.  Technically it is still summer but the days and weather lean more to the fall-ish side.  It is the day of sunflowers, chrysanthemums and gathering of acorns yet it is still the day of hydrangeas, sunshine, and sandals. 

I love the unhurried pace of the day.  It makes me want to achieve things but also to just sit back and enjoy whatever I am doing.  No time pressure.  No feeling of "hurry up and wait." Just a good balance of work, play and create.  It is a perfect day for all of it.  The sweet juxtaposition of doing and being; the active fall and the languishing summer. 

It reminds me of the month leading up to our wedding.  Just before it, I had an accident at work- slipped on a freshly waxed floor and landed right on my backside.  I was told to go home and rest for a couple of days. Even though the wedding date was looming, I found those days were wonderful. I could lounge in bed reading books.  A co-worker loaned me all of her D.E. Stevenson books and I was in heaven, reading about the trials and tribulations of everyday life in England and Scotland.  I was transported. 

It seems to me that the quality of today's air is like it was twenty-seven years ago. When I feel it, I am transported to a place where I feel mellow.  Like the country song says, "no shoes, no shirt, no problems." (except of course, the shirt!)

Every year, in September and October I look forward to days like today. I wish I could bottle it, but then I wonder if it would be as special?  When days like this come around, do I squander it or do I thoroughly enjoy each moment?  And, do I have to wait until my surroundings, e.g. the air and sun quality, are just right in order to feel this peace?  If I cannot bottle those qualities, can I still achieve this mellow feeling without it? 

Underlying the perfect day is a feeling of hope, expectation, possibilities and a future. Certainly those were some of my feelings leading up to our wedding.  If those are the qualities of a perfect day, why cannot each day be perfect?  

What about you?  Do certain times of the year speak to your heart?  When is it?  Why is it?  Is it a time of remembrance?  A time of hope?  A time of peace? 

Certainly Jesus promises us a peace that passes all understanding. When we trust Him, we do have a perfect day of hope, expectation, possibilities and a future. 

Doing the Right Thing

I don't know about you, but the protesting from the last couple of weeks has really gotten to me.  I am distressed that people will speak and act so violently against other people. It seems as if both parties can incite their own and each other.

I wonder if I were part of a protest, would I get carried away? The log is in my own eye because there is a part of me that just wants those with whom I don't agree to just shut the heck up.  Hopefully I would never resort to violence to have them be quiet.  But are those who protest seemingly reasonable any other time?

I am a firm believer for freedom of speech so I would hope that my desire for that universal freedom would override any "mob" mentality.  If I start picking and choosing who may speak, based on my preferences, then I am no better than the dictators or absolute rulers of this world.  I hope that I would choose and do the right thing when it comes to dealing with individuals whom I may not agree.

Last week there was a story that exemplified someone who was choosing and doing the right thing.  A news reporter, Al Letson was in Berkeley California, reporting on a protest of white supremacists and its counter protest of anti-fascists or antifa. As Mr. Letson was watching things unfold, he saw a white supremacist fall to the ground and an angry group of antifa approach the fallen man with what appeared to the journalist intent to harm or possible kill the fallen white supremist.  So the journalist broke the journalist code of "not becoming part of the story" and lay on the man, covering him with his own body so that the left-wing, antifa protesters would stop.  The journalist was hoping that the anti-protesters would see him, a black man on the ground and not harm him or the gentleman underneath him. 

What a hero and a testament that as humans, we can show compassion, understanding and empathy even if we do not agree.  

But, I wonder- would I be as brave as the journalist?  Would I stand up for someone even if I did not agree with the other person? 

I haven't been part of any protests, nor have I been put in a split second decision to offer my life for someone else, but I have had opportunities to sign petitions or statements for various groups.  Most of the requests I would say I agree with the sentiments but there is generally some statement or statements that I cannot completely agree.  I find that almost every issue has nuances and is not so cut and dry.  Some of the sentiments are quite true but once "on board", I find that there are other sentiments that are not quite in keeping with the intention.  

And so I struggle.  How do we know what to believe?  How do we, as Americans, get out of this negative, all or nothing, vile hatred of other's beliefs and in turn of others?  How do we protest without being violent?  How do we agree to disagree?  How do we get the other side to listen to us?  How do we get institutions to revoke policies and practices that are not equal to all Americans? How do we not remain bitter when that happens? 

I was thinking that I need to look back.  I am wanting to read about forgiveness and grace.  How did South Africa turn the tide of apartheid?  Certainly there was blood shed and much hardship.  But how did Nelson Mandela and Archbishop Desmond Tutu work with the same people who imprisoned and hurt them?   How do we work, live, play beside the people whom we do not agree?  How can reconciliation occur? 

What about you?  Have you thought about the protests happening in our nation?  Have you participated in any?  What was the feeling of the crowd?  Would you be as quick thinking as the journalist to protect someone whom you disagree? 

Have you had the opportunity to do the right thing?  Or, by my using the action word, "doing", are you in the process of exploring the right thing? 

Click here to read the story of the journalist doing the right thing.  

Living the Dream

One of our dreams- travel with our boys.  We are overlooking the Danube River in Austria.  Standing on ruins of Durnstein castle where Richard the Lionhearted of England was held having been captured for ransom in 1193 A.D.  upon his return from the Crusades. 

Do you ever dream or envision a life different than what you are currently living?  Is this new vision a reality or a pipe dream?  Are you totally unrealistic in your wishes or just afraid to try?  Is this vision a calling? Does it comprise of your talents, gifts, abilities, desires? 

I have enjoyed the musings of author, Jennifer L. Scott and her blog, The Daily Connoisseur.  At that site she expounds on living excellently.   She touches on topics like dressing appropriately, the ten-item wardrobe, practicing poise in one's daily life, home organization, simplicity and in general, how to live life well.  

What I like about her is that she is unapologetic in her opinions.  For instance, she will comment on the unmannerly use of inappropriate language or the benefit of dressing well in public.  For her, there is no shame in enjoying good things. Her rationale for doing so is not so much for hedonistic pleasure but a philosophy on life that good living is honorable. 

She has disclosed that in the next year she, her husband and three children will be traveling throughout Europe visiting family (her husband is British) and having experiences with her children.  In order to prepare for a lifestyle like this, she and her husband have made choices to be debt-free. They have made sacrifices for this plan. 

Kudos for her for having an idea on how they will live their life and then have a plan and discipline to do so. 

It inspires and encourages me to re-think the direction I am going.  As I have been considering work/life balance, I have been reevaluating purpose and plan for my life.  My musings are not such a major re-consideration or adjustment in my life, but just a fine tuning. Through much of the process I am just validating and regrouping what I already know.

Do you know where you are headed in life?  Do you feel a calling for a certain profession, a way of life or even a specific activity? Ms. Scott's example is not a big passionate lifetime calling like being an overseas missionary but it does follow the desires of her and her family's heart.  Not all of us are called into the big visual ministries.  Yet all of us are called by God to live the life He has designed us to live. 

There are steps to fulfilling our call in life which includes many choices on our part.  For me it comes down to my interaction with God and my election of free-will throughout those choices.  

1) God has a plan for each one of us.   Our journey in life is discovering the call, listening to it and obeying that call. That plan generally includes the people in our lives (spouse, friends, children, grandchildren, etc.) because we do not go through this journey alone.

2) God has given us gifts and graces in order to carry out that call.  He doesn't give us an assignment without giving us the necessary tools to do it.  It may be that we need to practice our talent, learn more about a subject through education or through the wisdom of others. 

3) God will give us the details of the plan.  This can be the troublesome point.  God will unfold the details for the plan, but generally not all at once.  In our "need to know all"  mentality, we have to trust that God will tell us as we "need to know just this much. For now". 

4) God will give us the discipline to continue through the call.  If we ask.  This is our active part of trusting in God.  I have found that as I grow in my faith (through Bible study and prayer), He is shaping me through discipline.  He gives me the strength to keep going when the times are tough.  He reassures me of His plan when I doubt if the call is real.  Sometimes, I need physical discipline (like Ms. Scott learned to be debt-free in order to do her travel) and "bottom" (as they say in the UK) to make hard lifestyle choices so that I can follow the call.  

5) God will redirect us when our call is complete.  I do think that we may have a lifetime call or we may have a call for "such a time as this". Our calling and plan may be short lived but that doesn't mean that it wasn't significant nor impactful. 

Our call doesn't have to be mutually exclusive from our heart's desires.  If there are activities, situations or things that bring us joy, it can all be part of the plan.   Whatever the future holds, it should be weighed against what God has planned.  Just ask Him.

What about you?  Would you be able to follow your heart's desire?  Have you asked God for guidance in your overall life?  In your day-to day? 

---

One life on this earth is all that we get, whether it is enough or not enough, and the obvious conclusion would seem to be that at the very least we are fools if we do not live it as fully and bravely and beautifully as we can.

~Frederick Buechner

Rotten Potatoes

For the last two weeks, every time I would enter our back basement I smelled something unpleasant.   At first I thought it was the remnant smell of some wet wool carpets I had been cleaning and drying.  Then I wondered if the dogs had “done something”.  Next I was convinced that the sump pump was emitting an unused odor.  I even added some bleach water to pump it through and freshen it up.  

Still the smell remained.

It was only when I was getting some food out of our small basement freezer that I discovered the problem- there were rotting potatoes in our “root cellar” basket.  I keep the extra potatoes and onions in a basket in our back cellar.  It is cool enough there to keep the items for a while.

When I looked through the basket I found the source- a small rotting area on one of the potatoes. What is amazing to me it that something so small could be so odiferous. One would have thought the entire basket was rotting. 

It is another reminder of how small things in our lives can matter: how a mean comment in our youth can dictate our views of ourselves or how a small decision may change the trajectory of our life.  

They say "don't sweat the small stuff", but most of life is made up of small stuff- the day to day grind or the proverbial rat race.  For me it is the little stuff that trips me up and makes the air around me unpleasant.  It is my lack of discipline (Why did I spend thirty minutes watching something useless on youtube?) or hesitation (All I needed to do was to introduce myself to that new member at the club) or laziness (I just don't feel like updating my linked in page)  that creates and spreads further problems.  First of all I berate myself for not doing a simple task.  Then the more I don't do it, the more it becomes a problem and the more self-loathing I experience.  

The basket of rotting potatoes is also an example of how even a small sin, that which keeps us from God, can permeate the life around us.  If I had left the rotting potato in the basket, it would have completely spread the rot to the others and the whole basket would've been ruined.

My heart breaks when I hear someone feel distant from God because of some small issue- may have been a choice of the person's own doing or one that happened to him/her.  Either way, it has continued to grow and spread so that his/her life now has become so distanced from God that there is feeling of hopelessness and never getting things right.  There even  becomes an adjustment in one's thinking that this distance is normal and will always be this way.

The thing is- you can always clean the basket.  In getting rid of the basement odor, I had to identify its source.  Some times we need a good self examination of what is going on in our lives.  David in the Psalms asks that God examine his heart.  That is a good place for all of us to start when we cannot locate the unpleasantness in our own lives- asking God to show where we have fallen short.  Then clean the basket: ask for forgiveness from God, or in the case of negative attributes (like my laziness) plan to be proactive with positive attributes.  Finally, proceed on the new path.  Start behaving or living your life in this clean environment.  It doesn't have to be a big production.  Just like small negative things add up, so do small positive things. 

What about you?  Any rotten potatoes in your life?  Do you even smell anything bad?  Or, have you lived with the smell so long you don't even notice it?  What steps can you do to "clean that basket"?  

Best Advice You Have Received

Grow your own herbs.  (Basket was outside a cottage in an Austrian village.)

• Use the good soap. (Don't wait for things to be "perfect" or for special occasions in order to use your good things.  You are the special occasion.) 
• If a book doesn't grab you, put it down.  (There are too many things in this life that can easily distract us.  Choose only the things that resonate with you.)
• Write a thank-you note immediately after coming home from dinner, event or receiving a gift.  (Doesn't everyone like to be thanked ?  Certainly someone who invited you and spent time and/or money on you would like some small nod of  acknowledgement.)
• Acknowledge death and/or bad news immediately by sending a note of condolence, or speaking directly to the person the next time you see him/her.  (If not, the lack of acknowledgement will be a silent barrier between you.)
• If you have time to do something, do it when you are thinking about it.  If not, the time will pass and you will not have it again.
• Lay out your clothes the night before. (It is amazing how much time is saved in the morning when this is done.  Plus it is one easy decision already made for the day.)
• Plan out a week's worth of menus.  (Just like getting your clothes out the night before, this is one simple step to organizing a less stressed week.)
• Wear something nice when you have to do something you don't want to. (Part of the old, "act as if" adage.  Sometimes dressing the part when our hearts aren't in it gets us motivated.)
• Wear sunglasses and sunscreen. (Sunburn is not very attractive, nor is it healthy.  Plus it can be quite painful)
• Drink more water.  (A simple act which has loads of health benefits:  decreased headaches, less colds, more energy, improved memory, glowing skin, healthy GI tract, better mood.)
• Leave the party when you are having a good time. (You will be remembered fondly as well as you will remember the event fondly.)

What about you?  What has been some of the best advice you have ever received or given? 

Eclipse(d)

A total solar eclipse is seen on Monday, August 21, 2017 above Madras, Oregon. A total solar eclipse swept across a narrow portion of the contiguous United States from Lincoln Beach, Oregon to Charleston, South Carolina. A partial solar eclipse was visible across the entire North American continent along with parts of South America, Africa, and Europe. 

Photo Credit: NASA/Aubrey Gemignani  

Last Updated: Aug. 21, 2017
Editor: Gary Daines:  Website: https://www.nasa.gov/image-feature/2017-total-solar-eclipse

Yesterday was the day of a total solar eclipse, stretching from the West Coast in Oregon diagonally across America like a solar sash to South Carolina.  There has been much discussion about it, much excitement and to some extent much hype. 

Unfortunately, my location in the Mid-Atlantic didn't afford me a good location to see the eclipse. We had a lot of cloud cover.  Although during the appointed time when we should've experienced about 80% of the eclipse, the sky darkened and there was an odd glow about it. 

I have been thinking about the eclipse and word's definition.  Astronomy aside, eclipse also means "a reduction or loss of splendor, status, reputation," etc. (noun) or "deprive (someone or something) of significance, power, or prominence" (verb).  It also means "to cause to undergo eclipse".

Got me thinking about the things that seem to eclipse me:  fear, anxiety, bitterness, disappointment.  These are the things that block me from experiencing life and all its glory, joy and beauty and these are the things that I allow to deprive me from being the person I was created to be.  

Do you ever feel eclipsed?  Have you ever felt a loss of significance, power or prominence? Do you ever feel that you have been deprived?

With all the safety warnings of not looking at the sun, I was reminded of the Greek myth of Icarus who flew too close to the sun with his wax and feather flying contraption.   Icarus was instructed by his father to stay on the flight path: to fly not too close to the sea and not too close to the sun.  Icarus in his giddiness to fly, did not heed his father's warnings and had a fatal accident when he ascended too high and the heat of the sun melted his wax causing him to  fatally fall.  The warning of the myth is to avoid complacency and hubris.  

What is surprising to me is that in the eclipse video feeds of the places that received totality, that even though it was getting darker, when there was only just a sliver of sunlight showing, there was still light to see.  Even with impeding darkness, the sun's rays are powerful enough to shed some light in even the smallest of areas. 

It gives me hope that although I may be deprived of living the way I should be, there is still a chance that I can get it right.  I can choose whether I will allow those feelings of fear, anxiety, bitterness and disappointment to dominate my thinking and my life.  I can choose not to allow hubris to dictate my thoughts: to choose to not think of myself more highly than I really am.  For after all, when I am fearful or anxious it is because deep down I think I can control every outcome.  When I a bitter or disappointed it is because I think I deserve better.  It is all arrogance  and pride on my part.

The eclipse reminds me that even though the sun might not be seen for a time, it is still there behind the moon and will shine again soon.  I may have things blocking and depriving me a life free of worries but it doesn't always have to be.  The sun reminds me of God's promises that He is in control and is always there.  When I get anxious (and lately, I have been anxious about many uncontrollable things) I have to remind myself that God is still there, He is in control, He has taken care of things in the past and will do so in the future.  I need to recognize my frailty and humanness and give over to His sovereignty. 

What about you?  Did you watch the eclipse yesterday?  What was your reaction?  Do you ever feel that things in life are "eclipsing" you?  What are they?  What do you do to "be safe" during those times? 

The sun reminds me that when I put things in its proper place- humbling aligning myself  with God- I am free to enjoy the world around me.  I am free of fear, anxiety, bitterness and disappointment.  The sun reminds me that I do not need to be eclipsed. 

Take Pleasure in Toil

For those of you who have faithfully subscribed to this blog, you have read of my struggles for work/life balance.  Some of you have related to me your own struggles with this topic. 

As I have been pondering this struggle a Bible verse came to mind,  "I (the writer of Ecclesiastes) perceived that there is nothing better for them than to be joyful and to do good as long as they live; also that everyone should eat and drink and take pleasure in all his toil- this is God's gift to man." Ecclesiastes 3: 12 & 13.

In my Bible's commentary it notes that this verse suggests that "rather than becoming embittered by what God has not granted human beings (namely, the ability to comprehend all of reality), one should enjoy the gifts that God has given." 

Touché.  I realize that I am becoming embittered with my situation and towards others and myself because I can not comprehend all of my own reality.  For me, comprehension includes control.  If I am honest with myself, I want to be the one in control of my reality which means I need to know all and to be able to control others' decisions regarding my situation. Yet I know that certain things are beyond my control. Not only can I not comprehend all that is around me, I cannot comprehend why I cannot figure things out.   I can strive to be balanced, but I may fail miserably. 

This verse reminds me that I should just focus on the basics- enjoy the things that God has given me, strive to do good deeds and to work at my calling.  For the immediate present, I might not be able to do all that I hoped to do- devote a single mindedness to full-time work- but I can do what I can. 

I am slowly realizing that this smaller "action list" is a gift.  There is no need to make myself anxious or upset with self-loathing over unaccomplished goals.   All I need to be concerned about is being obedient to God's call on my life and enjoying the things that come my way and surround me,  whatever that might look like. 

What about you?  Are you still struggling with balance?  Do have difficulty enjoying the simple things? Why something so basic and seemingly easy is so difficult to do?  Why is contentment so elusive? 

What would it be like if we all asked, what can be done?  Not to get discouraged or to think of the bigger reality, but what small thing can we do that takes pleasure in our toil? 

I would encourage you (as I encourage myself) to enjoy this day and enjoy the toil, whatever comes our way.  

No Answers, Only Questions

As I sit to write this morning, I feel the heaviness of life not going according to plan.  As a reader reminded me by quoting John Lennon,  "Life is what happens when you are busy making others plans."

In some ways that is true.  We can have the best laid plans but the reality of our lives is what actually happens.  I am also reminded of a dear friend who remarked that many times things for her would "go wrong" when she planned a project, e.g. ran out fabric or paint, etc. However, the final result after having to adapt to the new situation, was better than originally planned. 

I am holding onto that image.

I feel that I am constantly battling trying to stay positive and hopeful versus despair over not being able to accomplish that which I thought was my calling.   I am battling the feeling of guilt for wanting to be left alone in order to work and for feeling resentment of others who do not understand.  I am battling the concept of looking at the interruptions as my current calling and work and having to put my writing aside. I am battling the self-centered desire to tell everyone about my "terrible" situation (poor me- wah, wah ) and in wanting to be forbearing and gracious in my handling a tough situation.  

Each day I go through these mental gymnastics.  I thought I might be getting a handle of the life interrupted by trying to reframe my expectations.  (see last post)  I had given myself permission to work on some new projects, complete some old ones and to explore work/life balance.  I was planning that this August would be one of experimentation and solution. 

It has been ten days of testing my resolve. There have been daily interruptions of extended family needs and the interruptions are not of the couple minutes or hour variety but ones that take up the whole day's time.  

I thought I was on to some type of answers:  I began each day thinking I will actually get to do some work. (I planned and marked my calendar for it.)  I also began each day trying to be open to some interruptions or changes.  But what has actually happened is totally beyond what I planned or imagined.  Makes me wonder what God is trying to tell me through this ordeal.

So, I have come to the conclusion that I have no answers.  Whatsoever.  Only questions for you: 

How do you balance work and life?

How do you set boundaries with family members?

How do you manage the feeling of selfish guilt when you are trying to be true to yourself?

How do you not feel guilty when you say no because you are trying to earn a wage? 

How do you manage your time? 

If you have struggled with this issue, what did you learn about yourself, others and God through it? 

I would be interested in hearing your thoughts. I do not think I am alone in this problem of feeling that everyone else is determining my daily schedule.  I think many of us feel that we have no control in what we are doing.  I also recognize that this is the life stage that I am in, as I have no choice in some of the interruptions.  Just like I imagine there might be no choices for some of you.  But I also cannot help but think there must be a better way- a way which would honor those who are "interrupting", would honor that which makes each one of us unique and a way which would honor God through our care of ourselves and others.

I was comforted during the morning's Bible reading.  What I love about the Psalms is that David pours his heart out to God.  No holding back.  I feel that I can do the same.  I want answers from God. 

Psalm 62:8, "Trust Him at all times, o people; Pour out your heart before Him, God is a refuge for us." Psalm 69:16, "Hid not your face from your servant, for I am in distress; make haste to answer me."   

So what about you?  Any answers? 

Permission- Saying Yes

Last week  there was a comment on Friday's post.  In essence the reader asked for advice on how to begin doing the things she would like to do, now that her kids are grown, etc.  

Tough question.  I answered as honestly as I could and how I would approach the issue, but I felt that my tone might have been too preachy.  Not that I meant to be because I certainly don't have any answers. I am just traveling along this journey beside each one of you. 

Over the weekend I have been thinking a lot about that question. How do we go about fulfilling long lost dreams or suppressed wants and try to live a life that we are called to live and that we want to live? 

For many of us it is not that we cannot do the physical requirements for achieving what we want, i.e. running/walking to prepare for a 5 K, reducing the number of sweets in our diet, cleaning up a room, spending time reading or planning a trip,  but it is that we have to overcome the voices in our head.  When we dwell on activities or plans that would benefit us we think we are not worth it.   We think, "I can't justify spending this time on me."  and so we stop any self-improvement, achievement of goals, or even thinking about what we want to do.  

I think it is especially hard for women.  As much as we are independent and assertive, we seem to have a predilection for putting others' needs before ours.  Not that that trait is a bad thing per se. It is very admirable and one that I do not want to lose. 

However I think it causes us much consternation, anxiety and strife. 

We have to learn how to balance our needs and the needs of those around us.  It means being honest about ourselves and saying that we are not going to hide behind the excuse, "Oh, I can't do that now because I haven't earned that right or that I am not worth it or that I have to take care of ... (fill in the blank)." When I am honest with myself, I think I have hidden behind the excuse of caring for others instead of taking the risk and doing that which would make me happy, fulfilled and ultimately worthwhile and beneficial for others.

I think working our way out of the head battle is to start by giving ourselves permission: permission to explore what is our calling, our passion, our interests and our goals. 

This month, I am going to try and explore this idea. I have a pretty good idea of my calling, passion and interests, yet I find myself always putting those things on the back burner. I am giving myself permission to find some time to either work on those perennial goals that have been hanging over my head for years or decide to lay them to rest once and for all and move on. 

In order to do this, I am experimenting with posting only one blog per week ( although I might put some extras out there)  so that I can explore the other items on my list.  I am trying to see about balancing my responsibilities and my needs/wants- taking care of others while I am trying to take care of myself.  

I don't think that the choice is an either/or equation. It cannot be mutually exclusive. I cannot completely stop doing some of my responsibilities nor can I only do them to the exclusion of what makes me tick.  But I can try and cut back on certain things so that I can have a little more room in my schedule to explore this notion. 

I am giving myself permission to say yes to things that would "benefit" me.  

What about you?  Do you feel the angst and anxiety of trying to satisfy much responsibility? Do you do so at the exclusion of caring and doing things for yourself?  What would it look like if you had a good balance between the two?  Can you let go of somethings and take on others?  

For the month of August will you join me as we explore this idea of balance in one's life?  Of finding a life that reflects our gifts, passions, talents and also reflects our care for others and our responsibilities.

Let us know how you are progressing in the comments section below.   

Vacation Post Mortem

As part of the post mortem of my  vacation, I am working on some of the lessons observed/learned. Namely I need and want to get organized both professionally and personally.  I want to start the month of August feeling organized, somewhat in control and ready for action.  I always imagine my life like swimming:  I want to feel that I am on top of the waves, able to withstand changes in the current intensity or wave height and feel that I am moving forward toward a destination.  I don't want to feel that I am being pulled under by the current of excessive things or unrealistically tight schedules and the struggle that I am always trying to keep my head above water. 

I just finished going through my office- culling out my book shelves and files. I found two boxes of filled journal pages. Some of the journals go back to elementary, junior high  and high school.  As I glanced through them and reread some entries, it was a good exercise of reflection.  For one, if there was any doubt about my desire to write, I know now that I was itching to write from the time I was younger.  

The thing that really struck me was that I have not really changed since junior and high school.  I have pretty much the same views about life and the same fundamental principles.  I have always felt that I was an old soul when I was younger.  In reading through the journals I realized, I was.

But the thing that really grabbed me was that I have not really changed since junior and high school.  So many of the same things that I struggle with today, I struggled with back then.  Have I not learned and retained anything?!!  

On one hand it is very distressing, disappointing and discouraging.  Many of my struggles are in the refrain of wanting to do something significant.  After all these decades haven't I done one smidgen of something significant?  And then I wonder why do I put such weight on trying to accomplish that?  Shouldn't I have a wiser and more mature view of life?

Perhaps I am looking at the question incorrectly.  As with all reflection it involves one's self.  I am looking at things that involve and that are controlled by me. Perhaps I need to ask if I learned anything in my faith journey?  To ask if I listened and was obedient to God throughout those decades?  On that front I have tried, but I still am a slow learner.  Certainly if it takes me many decades to "get it", I am in good company. Most of the individuals in the Bible took a while to "get it". 

Even so, I realize that it is time to get my act together.   I am tired of half done goals, thoughts but no action on self-improvement and the same lament year after year.  I am ready to finish or  forget it and move on to something else.  Either way, I do not want to look back in another four decades and see that I still am writing about the same old complaints, anxieties and issues. 

What about you?  Have you ever traveled back in time via old journals or papers?  What had you noticed about your former self and your current one?  Have you ever set out with improvement goals and met them?   How did that make your feel?  If not, do you want to?  How would you go about it?

I keep imagining what it would look like if I dedicated the next year to finishing the things that I have focused on for all these years.  What would it look like if  I actually did make changes that I think need to happen? 

The thing with a post mortem it explains the cause of death or literally "after death".   There is no reviving the body and getting a do over.  How fortunate we are that in reflecting on the past and moving towards the present, we are able to put an end to all the angst over unfulfilled goals and dreams and move on to other things in life.  

10 Travel Tips

As I have been thinking about our trip, I was thinking of things that aren't told in travel guides but I think are key  to having a good time.   

1. Sense of Adventure.  One thing that was brought home is that we have to have a sense of adventure, a go with the flow or a "when in Rome" mentality.  For all the carefully planned itineraries, things happen- lines are longer than expected, train workers go on strike, the weather may or may not cooperate.  Actually I kind of like when things don't go as expected or a new challenge occurs.  It provides an opportunity to test one's mettle.  Will I fold in despair or rise to the challenge?  Many times the solution and its experience is much better than planned.
2. Remove one outfit from your bag.  Even though each of us had only one carry-on, I still brought more clothes than I actually wore.   Partly it was due to the weather.  I had looked at the temperatures for Rome, Florence and Vienna before I left but the actual weather was slightly different.  Not that an extra shirt or skirt took up much room, but it seems once you are schlepping bags through airports, onto trains, buses, up and down escalators, stairs and down cobbled streets every little item seems to gain extra weight. 
3. Wear good walking shoes.   I am so glad that I brought the shoes I did and that I had three pairs so I could rotate every day.  I had some goals in mind. Closed toe because walking through the streets can be a mess.   One pair was a comfortable slip on which was helpful with airport security. There were places in Rome that I was grateful for the toe protection. I needed a pair that would be good for bike riding. My walking pair that I used on our Oxford trip was perfect- light weight, stylish and rubber soled. I also didn't want shoes that screamed ugly American.  I found a nice pair of wedged, espadrille type sandals.  They were stylish but I could navigate through the cobbled streets fine. 
4. Carry a water bottle with you.    We always set out each morning with full water bottles.  You never know where you can find water.  Some of the "touristy" places really soaked you for it.   We did find water pumps throughout Rome.  The first time we saw a workman stop and fill up his bottle we wondered, is it legit?  It was an old pump, had a greenish patina on it.  But it was cold and fresh.  Turns out it is part of the Roman aquaduct system.  Of course while I was drinking from it,  I turned to my family and asked, "Do you think they upgraded the lead lined pipes?"
5. If you see something, buy something.   We visited one of the local Saturday markets in Florence.  The choices of fruits and vegetables were amazing!  Fresh, colorful and tons of variety.  At the market they also were selling household wares and clothing.  Some new, some used.  There were some new Italian linen pants and shirts that were very inexpensive.  I toyed with getting something but decided against it.  After seeing the same type of items here at the states, should've gone for it. 
6. Purchase online tickets before hand.   There were some place on our itinerary that we knew we wanted to visit.  We weren't quite sure of the day but we just decided to fill in our plans from home. We noticed on our last trip, if you schedule online that many times the cost is cheaper, you don't have to wait on line at the ticket booth and you don't have to worry about money. 
7. Eat where you see the locals eating.  We had a wonderful dinner in Vienna (actually we had many wonderful meals, cannot think of a bad one) at a local beer garden.  It was a local brewery and they had simple wooden tables set up under the canopy of a tall tree in their courtyard.  The ground was covered with fine stone that crunched as people trudged in.  People were greeting one another, coming from a day's work or celebrating with friends.  There was a Vietnamese family sitting at the table next to us.  During the meal another table dweller approached them, asked where they were from and explained that he was in Vietnam.  There were shared stories and drinks among them.  Quite a picture of community.  
8. Try the language.  Well, my experiences with languages are not so great.  But I did make a noble effort.  Of course, every time I said thank you, it sounded Spanish.  
9. Visit smaller museums or take a day trip.  We visited a very small museum in Florence featuring Leonardo  Di Vinci. I think it might have been geared for kids but it was just up our alley.  They had prototypes of the different machines and inventions that Di Vinci drew in his notebooks.  Plus, they had a very interesting movie about his life. 
10. Read up about places.   Ideally it is best to read up about a place before going there.  It makes the entire experience so much more rich and full.  But, as in our case, we didn't have too much time before hand to do that so I am reading now.  The benefit in reading afterwards is that when places are described I can see them in my mind's eye. 

What about you?  What travel tips would you offer?  

What I Learned on my Summer Vacation

1.  Take time to enjoy experiences and people.  I was so struck with the non-hurried lifestyle of vacation. Not just our experience but the lifestyle we witnessed of those around us.   Of course, I am sure that there were plenty of locals who rushed about and felt that they were rushing but the atmosphere did not feel frenetic.  I liked the pace we set while on vacation but I don't know how we can transpose that feeing now that we are home.  I am trying to set more wiggle room in my calendar- prepare for interruptions, plan ahead for activities as well as plan fewer amount of items to do in a time period.  I am trying to enjoy the moments.
2. Eliminate the clutter.  The apartment we rented in Vienna was very modern.  It wasn't spartan or minimalist but it certainly didn't have any extra frills and thrills.  It was refreshing.  It made me think about our home and all of its stuff.  Since we have returned, both my husband and I are in the process of decluttering.  I had mentioned once before that my goal is to eliminate 1/4 of items/stuff in each of our rooms.  I am getting there.
3. Just because things have always been a certain way, doesn't mean it has to be that way.  I think sometimes we get so caught up in doing activities because that is how we have always done them.  Not that what we were doing might be wrong, but we never allow ourselves to experience something that might be different and possibly better.  I noticed this with European meals, especially breakfast.  When we landed in Italy via Air Berlin, our morning airplane "breakfast" was a sandwich.  At first I couldn't stomach it. We had been up all night flying and had had dinner in the air.  According to our flight times it was 2am EST but with the time zones, we were 8am in Dusseldorf.  According to our airlines, it was time for breakfast.   And according to our son who lived in Vienna for four months, breakfast might consist of what we think as "lunch" food.  We noticed more meats at breakfast in Florence, Rome and Vienna. Actually when I finally ate the sandwich, (waiting for our connection to Rome)  it was rather tasty.  Reminds me  that I don't have to fit into societal norms of what is "done". 
4. It takes just as much effort to dress nicely as to dress sloppily.   Now that we are back in the states, it is hard to pinpoint what exactly was the clothing difference between the European dresser and his American counterpart. (baseball caps? logo and messaging t-shirts? sneakers? ) The people walking about in Rome, Florence and Vienna seemed so much more well dressed and more put together.  They appeared to be more civilized and respectful of others. (not that clothes are that important, but sometimes clothes doth make a man)  My husband and I noticed the difference this past weekend when we attended a local street festival in our home town.  In the middle of the crowded street I stopped and thought, "We were at some festivals in Vienna and this looks so different."  It wasn't until then, that it dawned on me that the attendees' clothing was what made it seem different. At this weekend's festival, people seemed so sloppy in dress, in speech and in behavior. 
5. Be a sponge.   As always when we travel I realize what an ignorant rube I am.  I have so many things that I want to learn, to explore, to do.  Travel opens up curiosity.  It provides a different way to look at the current experience but I think it also opens up a new way to view the familiar. 

What about you?  Learn anything this summer?  Have you made any changes to your lifestyle? Do you want to make any changes?   How can you take lessons learned or observed and put them into practice? 

What did you learn on our summer vacation? 

La Dolce Vita

Overlooking the eternal city.  The dome is St. Peter's Basilica. 

One of the reasons I love to travel is that it gives you a better perspective on life.  Sometimes it reminds you that there is no place like home.  Other times, it shows you a different way to live than might improve your home life.  Most of the time it allows you space to view life with a point of view that you normally don't get.  A trip can inspire, encourage and enlighten you.

On our recent trip I was bombarded with so many thoughts and ideas.  Mostly I observed how the "natives" lived and interacted.  Watching them gave me pause to reflect on my life and to think about human existence and what it means to live on this planet.  

One thing that struck me was how unhurried most of the people seemed to be.  Yes, they were coming and going on mass transit but there didn't seem to be the frenetic pace that I witness in my neck of the woods.  I realize that I was on vacation (and perhaps they were too) so I wasn't going at a frenetic pace (but close enough with our task master son who had organized the trip and kept us on schedule) but the whole tone of the subway, streets and venues was one of unhurried enjoyment.  The only time that I felt somewhat frenetic was at the Vatican and being part of the tourist laden blob that was posing as a queue winding (more like pushing)  its way through multiple cramped door ways and rooms on the way to the Sistine Chapel.  

Here are five thoughts that I gleaned while overseas:   

1. Embrace the past while living in present.  Both apartments where we stayed were built over a hundred years ago.  The facades and interiors had that old world charm.  Yet the decor and amenities were sleek and modern.  
2. Limit/reduce the amount of time with electronics.  We certainly saw people on their smart phones both walking around and while they sat at a restaurant.  And I am sure people spend time on the internet in private. But we didn't see the majority of people doing that.  It seemed as if the majority of life happens in community; people were engaging and socializing with one another in the parks, outdoor bistros or beer gardens. The rooms and apartments where people live are not that large so they are forced to find larger spaces.   
3. Know what you don't know.  Nothing convinces me more that I am a dumb little oyster than by traveling and speaking to foreigners who seem to speak English without trouble.  They also seem to be well versed in their politics, our politics, various places in the world and all sorts of different subject matter.  I feel like a sponge trying to soak it all in. I certainly have topics I want to pursue and research now that I am home. 
4. People are people wherever they are.  As much as some people seem more sophisticated or polished, at the end of the day, we are pretty much the same with the same concerns, the same gripes and the same joys.  At all times during our travels- whether mass transit or airplanes, the overheard conversations among family and friends, wealthy or poor, blue or white collar, western or eastern european,  all sounded the same. 
5. History does repeat itself.   As we read the information plaques in the Roman Forum, Colosseum, Da Vinci museum of Florence, Albertina Museum of Vienna I was struck on how much about human nature has not changed.  There is still jealousy (Da Vinci was extremely jealous of Michelangelo), fear (many of the Roman laws were enacted to keep order since there was a large slave population) skepticism and scapegoating (you can see Galileo's finger in the Galileo Museum in Florence).   All of the same emotions as people are trying to make sense of their place in the world. 

It seems as if it always comes down to balance.  Balancing work, play and study in ways that bring enjoyment of life. Learning to take each day as it comes and to be mindful and fully engaged in whatever we are doing at that moment.  La Dolce Vita. 

La Dolce Vita- "The Sweet Life".  Our apartment overlooked this street.  

Traveling God-Winks

We had some interesting experiences on our recent vacation but no more than through our plans to come home.

While we were in Vienna our one son decided to purchase a new skateboard.  It was a fine thing for him to do as it is one of his hobbies and there are some famous skateboard companies and parks in Vienna.  It is a nice memento for him from his trip. 

Unfortunately we started wondering how we would transport it home.  All four of us had carry-on bags. When we travel we try to avoid checking baggage (have had too many friends with stories of lost luggage.)  The airlines on which we were flying were pretty strict about the weight and size of the carry-on but we were entitled to one free checked bag each.   So once the board was bought, we decided that we might as well purchase the items we were contemplating but hesitant due to the carry-on packing restrictions. We might as well use at least one free checked bag.  (We successfully did our travel duty- helping the economy of Florence in their leather industry through the purchase of shoes, jacket and bags.) 

We decided we would purchase an extra bag for all our items or pack in a box and check that through.  We looked for bags everywhere we went.  We measured hard cases, soft cases, duffle bags, etc.  Nothing would quite fit the skateboard.  We were ready to go to a packing store and purchase or "make" a cardboard box to fit. 

In the lobby of the Vienna apartment where we stayed, there was a shelf that various items would appear and disappear.  We learned that this was the "free for the taking" shelf in the complex.  We saw towels, maternity clothes, books, videos, stationery, unused toiletry items come and go.

On the second to last day of our stay we returned to our place and there was a duffle bag on the "free" shelf.  We measured it and the skateboard fit it perfectly.  Plus, the bag had wheels on one end for easier carrying. On closer inspection we realized why a perfectly good bag was for the taking- one of the zippers wouldn't close.  Not to be dismayed, I got out my travel sewing kit and using all the contained thread, sewed up the broken zipper side.  Then we purchased packing tape and wrapped the entire bag. It travelled through the baggage compartment beautifully.

One could say that the placement of the bag was a coincidence or just good luck or good karma. I believe it is another- a God-wink that demonstrates to me that the Divine cares about all the details in our lives. Of course this was not a necessary item. It didn't add to our basic needs but it was something that allowed us to bring home and enjoy some material things from this world. 

I think that God like to do nice things like that for His children.  I think He likes to give good gifts to us.  In the New Testament, both Matthew and John write of Jesus saying, "If you who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask Him? " 

What about you?  Have you experienced any "coincidences" while traveling?   Have you seen any God-Winks lately? What would that mean to you if God gave you a wink?  Would it encourage you?  Exasperate you? Annoy you?  Have you ever shared those experiences with others? Too embarrassed?  Too guilty? Too dismissive? 

Whether you are traveling today or not, keep your eyes, mind and heart open to God's gifts, even if it is something as frivolous as a checked bag. 

The unpacked bag when we got home.  All came through fine. On the right side you can see the red threads that helped keep that side of the zipper closed. 

European Vacation

Buongiorno!  Guten Morgen! 

We just arrived home this week from a wonderful two weeks in Europe.  One week was spent in Italy and the other in Austria.  It was a time when all four of us (my husband and our two sons) had a chance to be together and see places that we have only read about.

As we travelled around I was struck with many thoughts and ideas.  I am sure that my posts in the next couple of weeks will reflect them.  The thing that struck me the most was the civility that was displayed, especially in Vienna where we spent our second week.  It wasn't any surprise that I since discovered that Vienna is considered one of the most livable cities in the world. 

The first thing that I noticed that the city was clean.  In some ways I hate to say that because it sounds superficial. A city being clean is saying that attractive people are nice.  Which we know isn't necessarily true.  Cleanliness doesn't necessarily equate to being good or great.

However, it was so striking that I couldn't miss it. We travelled pretty extensively around the city and its environs and I rarely saw any litter.  The buildings looked so neat and put together.  The Viennese have a certain aesthetic.  When we would pass through the more manufacturing and industrial areas of the city even the lumber or parts were stacked neatly.  The workman fixing the stucco on the apartment building next door to where we were staying had the scaffolding, gear and even construction debris all neatly organized.  It was a beautiful still life of practical objects.

In observing the habitants it occurred to me that this is not a city of neat freaks (although if you lived there and were not one you might feel out of place).  It seemed as if the underlying reason for neatness was that there is a sense of "we are all sharing this space together and so let's make the most of it".  It is a philosophy of consideration.  Leaving the place just like or better than you found it.  The is always an exception that proves the rule. At one of our supper picnics in the local park, there was a family who left some trash on the bench.  But I also saw people picking up dropped paper and blowing debris and putting that detritus in the trash can. 

There seemed to be a respect for others and each one's personal space.  We did not witness any raucous behavior or even extremely loud conversations in public.  People waited patiently in queues to get on and off mass transit.  One is allowed to carry open containers of alcohol.  We saw many people enjoying a bottle of beer or wine during lunch or evening repasts.  I am sure that some of the gatherings can get loud but we never saw anyone out of control with the drinking.  On one of our day trips we met some Canadians. In speaking with them about many issues the husband spoke about Canada and its very strict alcohol laws.  He feels that Canada's confining restrictions causes the public to abuse the drinking unlike the Austrian's more liberal policy where the drinking is just a part of one's day.  Whether it is the moderation principle or that the Austrians are just polite and considerate and wouldn't think of over imbibing as to abuse and ruin their space through drunken disorderly conduct, who knows? 

It just seems as if the neatness and organization stems from a love of aesthetics and keeping things beautiful.  There is a correlation between surrounding oneself with fine art, good music and great ideas that lifts one out of the humdrum of existence. It appears to be a philosophy of enjoying life and letting other's enjoy his/her life too. No wonder there is statue of Goethe in one of the parks. 

What about you?  Have you had the opportunity to get away?  Did you observe behaviors or norms in the place where you went?  What strikes you the most when you travel?  Can that philosophy travel home with you?

After spending some time in Europe, I wish I could transplant some of the ideology here.  Not all of it mind you, but just the best parts from each place. I think I might start with my own home and its aesthetics. Not because I want to be a neat freak but because it is important to drink in with our senses all things that are beautiful. 

Coming Home

I wrote this post before vacation but will publish it on the Monday we return.  I have tried to have things in order so that our "reentry" back to our norm will be relatively painless.

The best laid plans of mice and men.

This week that we return I have to hit the ground running: doctors' appointments for family, moving one family member and continuing the paper work for another's move in addition to trying to get back to my writing.  Looking ahead at my calendar and the two week delay of activities, I am wondering is the vacation worth it? 

Seems like I am not alone in thinking this way.  As Americans, we work hard but we have a hard time taking off.   According to Project:Time Off ( whose goal is to shift culture so that taking time off is understood as essential to personal well-being, professional success, business performance, and economic expansion.)  Americans wasted 685 million of unclaimed vacation days in 2015.  

Many people don't take their paid vacation because they don't want to appear dispensable to management.  The thinking is, if management can manage without me for a week or two, they might think that my job is redundant or irrelevant and consequently fire me.   Interestingly, the Project: Time Off coalition found that "employees who take 10 or fewer days of vacation time are less likely to have received a raise or bonus in the last three years than those who took 11 days or more."  It is the employee who uses his/her vacation that financially benefits.   

It is so important to get away- preferably physically, but also mentally and emotionally.  It is important to have time away and responsibilities lessen.  For some, vacation is few and far between but is necessary.  It is the sabbath of our working lives.  The other lesson from the Project: Time Off study is that one needs to plan for it.  If we don't plan, we most likely won't do it. "The single-most important step workers can take is to plan their time off in advance, as more than half (51%) of planners used all their earned vacation time compared to 39% of non-planners. Yet less than half (49%) of households set aside time to plan their vacation time each year. Further, planners reported greater happiness in every category measured, especially relationships with partners and children."

In order to make the vacation and its "reentry"  a little bit easier I am trying to get things in order before hand:  house cleaned, yard in a livable state, correspondences up to date, writing submissions done, desk in order.  It does make things a little crazy before we leave, but it is a push that makes the whole vacation more enjoyable for me.  I can relax because I know that things are "shored up" for the next couple of weeks and when I return it won't be too hectic (or so I hope).   

What about you?  Are you having a vacation this summer?  Will it be restful?  Are you looking forward to it or are you dreading the reentry? 

I have found that when I plan for vacation and for my return, it is more than just coming home.  It is a home coming filled with great memories, rest and rejuvenation. 

Noodle maker

Can you guess what this is? 

Have you seen one of these?  It is a noodle grater or called some such thing.  It  takes vegetables and spirals them into long "noodle- like" strips.  The strips can then be used as an alternative to pasta.

Friends of ours shared that they had one and that they had lots of fun making new recipes or alternating old ones with the "noodles".  Plus, for people who are limiting their carb intake it provides a nice alternative. 

I love ours.  It has given us some new taste thrills.  Our son who was never a fan of zucchini is eating it through our zucchini spiral "noodles".

I love finding new uses for old things.  In this case, a new way to prepare and present veggies. 

I also love finding new used for old things from around the house.  Items that may have been designed for one thing in mind but now are repurposed for another.  I started thinking of the things that we "reuse":  

• Christmas cards- front and possibly the sentiment (if neither has any writing on it).  Cut into smaller gift tags for next year's present
• Plastic bags from store or newspapers- use for doggie bags, lining waste paper cans (although I am trying to reduce the amount of plastic bags from stores)
• Old, stained cotton tablecloth- cut out the good parts and made into smaller napkins
• Jelly jars-  vases for cut flowers for friends
• Old spices- flavor to our dogs' dinners
• Dead bamboo sticks- lashed together to make an enclosure for our raspberries
• Cracked mixing bowl- Use as a container planter 
• Disposable leftover containers- washed, use as containers for garden fertilizer, grass seed, etc.
• Old kitchen knives- sharpened and use to cut and divide perennials 

What about you?  Do you repurpose things on a regular basis?  What are some of your ideas?

The Fifth of July

What does the fourth of July mean to you?  With the phenomenal success of the Broadway show Hamilton, I am somewhat amazed that there is not more of a cultural interest in our American beginnings.  I guess I am comparing it to the American Bicentennial and at that time, it seemed that there was a national interest in all things colonial. 

Of course, that was forty years ago and a lot of water has passed under the bridge.  We have witnessed more wars, experienced recessions, lived with consequences of corrupt politicians, questioned our history and legitimacy of being a world dominating power and seen the world become smaller through globalization.

Recently I found the song book for the musical "1776" among my mother's things.  At the time it was one of my favorites.  I found that I was a sponge to soak up all things related to our Colonial and Federal period.   I still appreciate the clever lyrics and I still find that I prefer American Revolution history over Civil War events. 

It might be that I appreciate the independent, greater good streak of our eighteenth-century forefathers rather than the selfish hiding under the umbrella of states' rights nineteenth-century ancestors.  (I know, a biased and limited account from my part.  I very much realize that both time frames do not reflect or honor a vast majority of our population- the African American slaves who were sacrificed beyond imagination for the White Americans' benefit.) 

More importantly, what does the fifth of July mean to you? Because as much as we may have celebrated yesterday with cook-outs, parades or fireworks, today is a new day.  We may have been reminded of our past with all its flawed goodness, but we have to move forward with our future.  What does that look like?  For us as a nation?  a community?  a family?  as individuals? 

Can we sit by and watch as individuals and people groups are discriminated against, violated of human rights, or treated with disrespect?  Can we allow our government to become isolated from the world around us?  Should we succumb to the national gossip? Should we take those in power to task for saying things that are not true or half truths?  Can we demand better of our leadership? Can we stand up to tyranny ("cruel, unreasonable, or arbitrary use of power or control") among our leadership? 

Sometimes I wonder what our founding fathers would make of this current United States.  Would they have wondered how we fared? That we fared as long as we have? Would they be surprised that we struggle with the same issues as they did? 

In the musical, "1776" there is a poignant soliloquy by John Adams. He reflects on letters from a discouraged General Washington.  Click here to see the clip from the movie.  

Adams:
Is anybody there?
Does anybody care?
Does anybody see what I see?
They want to me to quit; they say
John, give up the fight
Still to England I say
Good night, forever, good night!
For I have crossed the Rubicon
Let the bridge be burned behind me
Come what may, come what may
Commitment!
The croakers all say we'll rue the day
There'll gobble be hell to pay in fiery purgatory
Through all the gloom, through all the gloom
I see the rays of ravishing light and glory!
Is anybody there? Does anybody care?
Does anybody see what I see?
I see fireworks! I see the pagaent and
Pomp and parade
I hear the bells ringing out
I hear the cannons roar
I see Americans - all Americans
Free forever more
How quiet, how quiet the chamber is
How silent, how silent the chamber is
Is anybody there? Does anybody care?
Does anybody see what I see?

I think our founding fathers were incredibly brave and wise.  But they were no better nor worse than we are today.  I do have hope that people are listening and talking.  That we do see from where we came and to where we are headed.  I do have hope that this fifth of July and onward will be a time of renewal in our land.