Confucius said…
Recently I just heard someone repeat the above Confucius’ quote. It is a sentiment that can be expressed in many different ways: You only get one go around on this merry-go-round of life; Carpe Diem; Make the most of today; You only have one life to live; We only have now.
It is kind of sad that generally, those who realize that life is incredibly short are those who are of a certain age and have more life behind them than in front. Or those who have experienced chronic illness or tragedy at a younger age. In either case, it is a question of staring down mortality and realizing that this is it. Today. Here and now.
Why do we think we have all the time in the world?
Of course, there are hours and days that seem to drag on. And on. And on. Mostly, those are times of unpleasant or difficult situations. Those are the days that seem to never end.
Or we think that once we have achieved … (fill in the blank) or obtained… (fill in the blank), THEN we can move on or do something. I know I have felt that way and have delayed truly living my life. Even with doing something small like starting a writing task, home project or inviting neighbors to dinner. But if we wait for everything to be “perfect” with “perfect conditions”, nothing will happen. The book won’t get written. The room won’t get painted. The opportunity to meet new friends will be gone.
I’ve been thinking a lot about how I spend my days and ultimately my life. On one hand, I realize that if I die tomorrow, that is it- I have done all that God wanted me to do. Yet I feel that I am not ready to die. I feel like I have more to offer and to do. As always, it is a balance of life: to recognize that we only have today and that we shouldn’t waste the day but to also realize that we should not feel stressed and “burn the candle on both ends” in trying to achieve everything. All at once.
It is interesting to see all the books and articles written about “how to have a fulfilling life”. (Google it and you will be amazed at what pops up.) Almost all of the resources talk about purpose and meaning in one’s life. Or living an authentic life. Sometimes, in my global, practical thinking mode I laugh. Only in a society of excess- excess of time and resources, can we do this navel gazing: how to be happy and fulfilled. When one is struggling to survive, these type of existential questions might not come up. And yet. These are questions that have plagued humankind since the beginning of time.
I think this search for meaning is part of our God-shaped vacuum in our souls, to paraphrase Blaise Paschal. But just because one may be filling one’s soul with God, it doesn’t mean that purpose, meaning and authenticity comes automatically. It is still a struggle to be in the world but not of it- to not be influenced by others but be the influence on others that God called us. We can do that by being kind, good, charitable, humble, and loving. By working heartily at whatever task God has called us. It might even require us to look at some of the articles by learned peoples to help us get the most out of living the best life God wants for us. Or studying what some of the ancients have written. After all, God put them on this earth and gave them a purpose too.
What about you? Do you ever wonder about your life? Do you feel that your life is fulfilled? Authentic? Filled with meaning and purpose? Are you in the world but not of it? How do you practice that?
“Teach us to number our days so that we may truly live and achieve wisdom.” Psalm 90:12 (The Voice)
I have heard the expression, “the days are long but the years are short” in relationship to rearing children. I think that applies to our lives. I don’t know about you, but I am ready to live my authentic life- fully filled with and for God.
Shameless Plug: I received my copy of two books that I have had the privilege to contribute to both of them.
According to my editor, the All God’s Creatures devotionals are now available at: www.guideposts.org/shop. 15% discount. Use code: AUTHOR15. Official release date September 9 but can be pre-ordered at Amazon, etc.
Also available at: guideposts.org/shop. Wide release to retailers (Amazon, etc) on October 14.
Net Worth
This summer we attended an art show. One artist designed beautiful prints with images from the design on dollar bills.
Have you ever noticed that during a google search of someone "famous" or "infamous" there is generally a posting about their net worth? There is some conjecture of how much money they made and how much money they are "worth".
Net worth is an accounting term meaning total amount of all assets minus all liabilities. It is financial in nature with the explanation of someone's dollars and cents.
In looking at the words, it almost connotes that net worth is all there is. That is the sum of one's worth. But isn't that term short-sighted? What about someone's worth as a person? To society? To friends and family? What about the intangible worth of a person?
I've been thinking about worth lately. More than the money kind. Do I have worth? What is my purpose? Have I made any difference? What defines worth?
I think some of it has stemmed from a dinner gathering we attended not too long ago. The dinner brought together a bunch of us who were friends when we were in our 20's and 30's but haven't seen each other or connected in any significant way in the last fifteen years. In some ways, the gathering was having a Christmas letter reunion over a delicious repast.
When we were younger our group met regularly and shared our views on life. We listened to each other's employment tales, hopes, dreams and romances. When we gathered for this reunion, we listened to each other's career paths, retirement plans and long-term relationships. In some ways each person became a laundry list of things and of acquisitions; each person's things became their worth.
It made me kind of sad. What happened to relationship building? To improving the world? To the intangibles like compassion, encouragement, blessing? To sharing God's love with our fellow man?
Isn't there more to life than what one eats and drinks and what one has acquired? Does it really matter where one is on the pecking order of life?
The word "worth" has a couple of meanings: the value equivalent to that of someone or something under consideration; the level at which someone or something deserves to be valued or rated; or high value or merit.
I am trying to remember that as a child of God each one of us has high value and merit. We are formed in His image. As the old saying goes, "God don't make no junk." There is so much more to a person than his/her net worth. I think of all the quiet and small ways millions of people care for one another: sharing encouragement, physical items, time, resources. All the seemingly insignificant ways that the world is changed little by little; through thoughtfulness, respect, self-sacrifice, honoring one another, listening, treating others how you would want to be treated.
I am reminded of the scene in the movie, "While You Were Sleeping." One of the male characters Peter laments that he hasn't done anything truly heroic his entire life.
Lucy, played by Sandra Bullock says, "You give up your seat every day in the train."
Peter replies, "Well... But that's not heroic."
To which Lucy replies, "It is to the person who sits in it."
The one who gives up the seat is a person of worth.
What about you? Have you ever thought about your worth? If your liabilities outweigh your assets (physically, financially, emotionally, spiritually) how can you turn that around? Are there things you need to give up in order to invest in a life of worth? What would that look like for you?
In this Day and Age
This past week I heard another story on the radio about women and the difficulty of their lives. The thought came to mind that in this day and age it is still unbelievable that we have racism, sexism, and poor treatment of others. For all our accomplishments as humans, we still hear story upon story of age-old problems: hunger, disease, warfare, hatred, discrimination, and domination. As a species, have we learned anything?
But then I thought, why does it have to be the negative? Why cannot we say, "in this day and age.." of things that are positive? In this day and age, can you believe that we can talk to someone across the world? In this day and age, can you believe that surgeons can stop a heart and replace it with another? In this day and age, can you believe we can open a metal box and find something to eat? For the general population we no longer have to spend most of our days hunting, foraging, sowing and harvesting. For many of us we do not have to worry about shelter, food and our immediate survival.
If we have advanced beyond the basics, are we improving the lives of others? Are we moving beyond a day to day existence to something more?
I am reminded of the Biblical story of Esther. She was the only one in a position to save the lives of her people. As her uncle reminds her, she was born for such a time as this. The question becomes in this day and age and in this time and place, am I helping to improve the lives of others?
I think all of us are born for such a time as this. For whatever reason, and it is partly our responsibility to figure out our purpose, we are born into our set of circumstances: family, time, place, temperament, gifts and graces. I am living in this day and age. The next question becomes, how am I living it? For the improvement of myself and others or as a repetition of the same old human condition?
What about you? Have you ever felt that you were born for such a time as this? Or do you feel that you are a pawn in the game of life and that you don't have much say in the matter? I believe while we cannot change some of the basic facts of our place and time of birth, we can choose to embrace and improve the situations we find ourselves.
In this day and age we can choose to focus on the positive and the improvement of the day and age.
The Greatest
Michael Phelps. The greatest swimmer that ever was. (To mangle a quote from one of my favorite movies, The Natural) The most decorated Olympic athlete ever. (18 gold medals and 22 total) A man with so much: so much potential and so much waste. Tragic.
There was an interesting article in Sunday's New York Times Sports section about Michael Phelps. He is on a comeback journey.
In April when my husband and I went to Washington D.C. we also visited the Portrait Gallery. It has great artwork but is not nearly as crowded as the National Galleries. Plus it is in the old patent office building which my husband likes.
There was an exhibit on portraits of various famous individuals- some from entertainment, some from politics, others from sport. For each subject they gave a brief explanation about the person, his/her accomplishments and life. For Michael Phelps, all the swimming accomplishments were overshadowed by his poor decisions resulting in DUI arrests. To have all his athletic accomplishments and then to be reduced to one's poor decisions is tragic.
As his coach told him, " Michael, you have all the money that anybody your age could ever want or need; you have a profound influence in the world; you have free time- and you're the most miserable person I know."
Part of The New York Times article is describing his comeback and how is on a path to wholeness. I truly hope that is the case.
His situation is similar to so many others. Sure, everything about him is larger than life than most- most people will never achieve the world recognition or fame or wealth, yet the human condition is still the same: we all desire a sense of purpose and a sense that there is something bigger than ourselves and our accomplishments. As Augustine of Hippo says, “Thou hast made us for thyself, O Lord, and our heart is restless until it finds its rest in thee.”
In finding God we find a life bigger than ourselves. We discover that life is not all about us, not all about our accomplishments and not all about our things. We find that by humbling ourselves and by serving our fellow humankind we can accomplish far greater things than being the greatest that ever was.
What about you? You might not be in Michael Phelps league, but you might feel that you are on a track to destruction. Or that you don't need anyone else's help or support. Or that you have everything that you could possibly want or desire yet you still feel empty. Do you have a sense of purpose with what you are doing and how you are living your life? Do you feel that your life is tragic? If so, have you ever considered looking beyond yourself? I would suggest that you look to the One who was, is and will always be the greatest- period.
Well Balanced
Would you want to end up like this?
This past week we have experienced some very windy conditions. The wind comes in these great gusts that turn the leaves of the trees inside out. There are many fallen branches and leaf debris on the sidewalks, streets and in the gutters. In the corner of our front garden is a fifteen year old butterfly bush. I have pruned it over the years but I must admit, not very well. Consequently it is about 10 feet tall with an umbrella-like branch structure emerging from a gnarly wooded trunk. When I say umbrella-like, it is more like one of those discarded umbrellas found pushed up against fences in alleys- opened on one side and half bent on the other.
The thing is, in looking at the bush, it appeared to be fine. Sure, it didn't have complete symmetry but that created some interest. Unfortunately I never realized how precarious the bush was. I didn't realize how much my inept pruning was weakening the plant.
It was only when I was out watering when I thought it seemed strange that the white hydrangea bush (which was under the butterfly bush) was looking squashed. Turns out the entire butterfly bush was blown over in the wind storms. It was just barely hanging on the the trunk by a small connection. The only thing I could do to "save" the bush was to cut through the tear and hope that I didn't cut back too much of the bush.
The bush was unbalanced hence it didn't have the ability to withstand the mighty winds.
What a great metaphor for our lives: when we are not balanced in our life we are easily toppled over. Some of the things that we do might not appear to be weakening our lives (like my asymmetrical pruning) and in fact might look okay. It is only when conditions change, generally beyond our control, and the storms of life toss us to and fro that we realize being off balanced puts our survival, aka sanity, in jeopardy.
Our lives end up looking like the discarded umbrella- not much good to anyone let alone ourselves.
I have been feeling unbalanced with my schedule lately-spending too much time with certain endeavors while neglecting others. It makes me feel anxious and agitated. I am in no position to be productive for anyone else let alone myself. When I receive a flurry of requests of my time, I feel like I will just collapse under the weight and force of the appeal for my time.
What about you? How balanced is your life? Do you feel that you are leaning in one direction over another? Is it a temporary situation or has it become so gradual that it is now a permanent feature in your life? How can you recover balance? Do you need to prune some things out of your life: saying no to things that are taking over in your schedule? Do you need to say yes to other things in order to allow that "side" of you to grow?
I don't know about you, but I don't want my life to become like the discarded umbrella. I want to become a person who is strong, steady, resilient and useful.
What is Your Chief Aim?
Taken at the US Botanical Gardens in Washington DC. A place where one can see, smell and experience the beauty and joy of our natural world.
If you were pursuing joy in your life, what would that look like? What activities, things, goals would you pursue? Would that pursuit brings you joy? What brings meaning into your life? Are you actively seeking it out?
When I think of joy I think of the Westminster Catechism: "What is the chief aim of man? To know God and to enjoy Him forever."
Granted, the language is a little archaic but I think the lesson is spot on. If only we would truly learn it: It is through knowing God that our lives fall into place. We recognize how He wants us to live and how He wants us to enjoy our lives. Unfortunately there are many who feel that God is a kill joy waiting for us to mess up so that He can do all sorts of bad things to us.
I do not think so. Jesus claimed that He came to bring life and to bring it abundantly. In the Old Testament, the writer of Ecclesiastes reminds us that "however many years a man may live, let him enjoy them all". God wants us to enjoy our lives.
I think God takes pleasure and joy out of His creation. If not, why would He create the platypus, the giraffe or a dog? All of these can bring smiles to our faces. If those things like the birds of the air and the flowers in the field bring delight to Him, how much more does He take pleasure in us, the creature He created in His own image?
And if He created all that fun and delight doesn't He want us to experience the same?
There is joy in that. Joy in the knowledge of God. Joy in the knowledge that He is in control regardless of our current situation. Joy in letting Him guide our lives. Joy in serving Him with our talents, thoughts, treasures and time. Joy in finding our purpose through Him. Joy in the knowledge that God brings meaning to our lives and with it, so much delight.
Great Decisions
The mission of the Foreign Policy Association today, as it has been throughout its 97-year history, is to serve as a catalyst for developing awareness, understanding, and informed opinion on U.S. foreign policy and global issues.
I have been attending a group, Great Decisions, that reads and discusses foreign policy. Our curriculum is written and provided by the Foreign Policy Administration. It has been an enlightening and interesting group. (If you are interested in sponsoring or finding a group in your area, Click here. Even if you don't join a group the site has wonderful articles and current reference materials.)
This semester contains 8 sessions about current affairs, mostly those things taking place in the Middle East and Asia. We've discussed or will discuss the Middle East alliance, Islamic State, The Kurds, Migration, The Koreas, United Nations, Climate Change and Cuba.
In all these topics that we discuss there are many issues. They all have complexities and nuances that require Solomon's wisdom. But it seems to me that underlying many of the issues is that a group of people- doesn't matter their nationality or race- feel unrecognized and obscure. They are feeling that they do not belong, that no one is listening and that there is no recourse except for violence towards those whom they consider "lesser" than themselves.
I am reminded that most people desire a sense of belonging, a sense of knowing and being known by others and a sense of purpose. For the heavy conflicts in the East, how do you get them to stop long enough to be known? How do you have them treat each other with decency and respect? How can they recognize and listen to one another without feeling that they have compromised themselves?
It is not just " another country's" problem. Our country may not be in a physical civil war with guns and ammo, but we have the same tensions between those who feel unaccepted and unrecognized and those who are not listening. It seems as if these same issues rise up whether one lives in the Middle East, Korea or downtown Baltimore.
What about you? Do you feel disenfranchised by your government, unrecognized by your religion, unknown by your neighbors, unaccepted by your family? Or if you are honest, is there anything in your own behavior that might be causing others to feel that same way?
I love the name of this 97 year-old series- Great Decisions. I keep thinking that it should be called, Great Discussions because the topics do evoke wonderful discourse but great decisions is more appropriate. I think that everyone needs to make some type of decision- will I just let things happen around me or will I, in whatever small way, participate? This class has been a first step in starting to grasp what goes on in the world. The more I learn about others and our "differences", the more I learn at the core of all of our being is just the same; we all want to be known, to have purpose and to have a sense of belonging.
My prayer is that each of the groups we study will find that. To some degree the fighting, the loathing, the bickering will not end until those desires are met. I can only pray that each person might experience it personally, with the thought that our longing of belonging and purpose is our internal pull to be drawn closer to our Creator, whether we want to recognize that or not. I think that is the great decision.