USPS

Neither snow nor sleet nor rain…. can you recite the remainder of the line? Know to what it refers?

The unofficial “motto” of the United States Post Office (USPS).* Whether we remember the refrain or not, we have come to expect that no matter what, the mail will be delivered.

Except when it will not- which may occur sooner than we think. The end of the postal service as we know it may happen in September.

Is anyone concerned about this? I find it alarming.

For a free and informed democracy to survive, the mail system is key. (Along with a free press, free speech, free public libraries, free public education, freedom of assembly, freedom of religion) How else can we disseminate information? Without being informed about politics, ideas, science, liberal arts, medicine, we cannot employ critical thinking skills which can lead us in poor decision making. In our ignorance we make ourselves vulnerable. We become easily manipulated by fear, myth, hearsay.

The system of sending letters, notes or packages is amazing. Over the centuries letters and packages have been delivered using couriers, boats, horseback, trains, planes, helicopters, bicycles, cars, trucks even a rocket. Mail is sent in all kinds of conditions- war, natural disasters, inclement weather, etc. During wartime though some words might be censored due to their sensitive nature, information, news, thoughts, and correspondences were sent. The letters might have been sent from the front lines, trenches, or make-shift hospitals, yet the majority of them were delivered. It is vital to national security and strategy to convey information without meddling as well as an individual’s wellbeing to be able to express one’s thoughts or beliefs via mail without interference.

With the closure of the USPS I am concerned that people of limited means will not be able to communicate or receive any goods or information. Using FedEx, UPS, or Amazon is costly. Subscribing to an internet service is not cheap, especially when you have to have the hardware- computer or phone to support and use the technology. Not that the postal service is inexpensive (and rates are always rising) but with limited means it would be costly to use private enterprises to send things or to communicate with others.

Of course, the decline and possible demise of the service is no surprise- inefficiency, poor judgement, elitism of the USPS ( government benefits, salaries, tenure), have all led the USPS to this place. It has always been a mystery to me why the USPS supported a bicycle team, one in which Lance Armstrong had his issues. (And we are a cycling supportive family.)

Should the nation do anything about protecting this freedom? Are we done with this “technology”?

I wonder. Are words on paper the apex of communicating? Writing can replicate ideas, thoughts, feelings, explanations, and law. (After all, something had to be created so that Adam could remember Eve’s honey-do list.) Actually it was later in history when we moved from an oral to written tradition. When we did that, there were those who thought writing it down made us “weak” and that it wasn’t such a great idea. Socrates in Plato's Phaedrus, quoting the prophecy of Ammon(Thamus) : "[Writing] will produce forgetfulness in the minds of those who learn to use it, because they will not practice their memory. [..] You have invented an elixir not of memory, but of reminding; and you offer your pupils the appearance of wisdom, not true wisdom..

The question becomes do the words have to be formed through some type of ink and does the paper have to be 3-D- a crinkly, tangible, weighted tract? Isn’t the computer more efficient? It certainly sends information quickly and I love its word processing capabilities. (I literally cut and pasted different drafts of my honor’s thesis so that I could type up a final copy.) Also true that digital files have expanded the depth and breadth of previously limited research. And true too, there is a lot of junk mail coming in the front door and going out the back into the recycling pile.

Still, I am not giving up on the truly written word. The pros of having something written permanently (no worries about an outdated computer or storage unit -floppy disc anyone?) seems worth it.

So, what am I going to do about this? While we still use snail mail for some correspondences, I know that my patronage isn’t enough. Should I just accept the changes? In reading what the founding fathers wrote I would say no. Perhaps the current legislative branch wants to update the freedom of the press through a national web service for free unbiased information and provide a national digital communication system - one that every home could receive for a nominal fee. Short of something like that, I question the demise of the postal service. How can we provide a basic function to bind our nation together?

According to the History of the Postal Service**:

“The Founding Fathers believed that to succeed, a democratic form of government depended upon the free exchange of news, ideas, and opinions. Thomas Jefferson wrote in 1804: No experiment can be more interesting than that we are now trying . . . that man may be governed by reason and truth. Our first object should therefore be, to leave open to him all the avenues to truth. The most effectual hitherto found, is the freedom of the press.

The first major postal law, passed by Congress in 1792, encouraged the exchange of newspapers by allowing them to travel through the U.S. Mail at extremely low rates of postage — in some cases for free — to ensure the success of the democracy.”

According to Title 39 of the U.S. Code: The Postal Service shall have as its basic function the obligation to provide postal services to bind the Nation together through the personal, educational, literary, and business correspondence of the people. It shall provide prompt, reliable, and efficient services to patrons in all areas and shall render postal services to all communities.”

What about you? Do you use the postal service? If so, for what? If not, how do you communicate? What service or procedure do you use for sending notes or packages? What other areas do you think are important for a free and democratic society? Where have we shifted our emphasis over our 244+ years as a Republic? For the betterment or not?

Guess it is time to write my congresspeople and senators. Ironically I will have to use email.

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* "Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night stays these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed rounds.” Herodotus in paragraph 98, book eight of The Persian Wars. The quote was inscribed on the neo-classical former post office building in NYC (8th and 33rd St). It became its unofficial motto.

** Click here to download the History of the USPS.

Weeds Disguised as Truth

Our backyard has once again morphed into a jungle. In the beginning of the season, my perennial gardens start out looking controlled, contained and cared for. By the time it is mid-growing season, the plants have spread and are all over the place. In addition, the weeds have sprung up over night. One of the problems in trying to pull out those weeds or at least to contain them is that they grow incredibly close to the plants I want to keep. In fact some, like the morning glories have become so intwined with my butterfly bush, roses, bee balm and peonies that I cannot yank out the morning glories without doing some damage to those other plants.

This past weekend my husband and I watched Mrs. Wilson, a three episode “mini series” on Masterpiece theater on PBS. What I find fascinating is that it is based on a true story that happened not too long ago. The story begins with the death of a conventional loving husband who leaves behind a distraught wife and two sons. What begins to unfold is the story of his life, his many wives and children and the deception that he conveyed. While he was a published author (23 books), there are questions to ask if his behavior was all a cover for his spy activity for the British government. As with all intrigue and subterfuge, every statement or fact is questioned whether to its truth or not. One wonders was he really a spy or just a pathological liar?

Closer to home in geography and time, I know of a couple of people who either were children of a deceptive parent with other families or wives of deceptive husbands who juggled simultaneously multiple families.

It makes me think of the concept of lies and truth. In all the thrillers that I have seen, when prepping a person for deception the “handler” explains that if one wants to lie, it is best to stick somewhat to the truth and deviate just slightly. Supposedly there is less error to be tripped up by trying to remember all the details. By slightly veering off the truth course, the information imparted is seemingly more believable.

Ahh. Doesn’t the father of lies just love how we justify deceit. Nothing is new under the sun the Hebrew wiseman suggests. “Go ahead and eat the apple,” the snake advises Eve. “You are not going to die,” he tells her.

In one sense, that is partly true. Eve and Adam did not die after eating the apple but, they did kill their open, innocent, shame-less, face-to-face relationship with God. Their physical bodies became the expression of their spiritual sin and through their disobedience caused them (and us) to experience hurts, illnesses, pain and eventually physical death.

So, “No. Mr. Serpent”, they didn’t die but it brought forth human tragedy.

I feel that as a society we are still experiencing the tragedy of half-truths and bold lies. Falsifications that appear to be quite close to the truth but are not. Falsifications which puts us, as a society, in a position of hurt, pain and even death for ourselves and for others.

Lies and truth seem to be on the front page of the news every day. It doesn’t matter where you fall on the political spectrum or from which news source you get your information- all news seems to report half-truths. It is very rare to find some source that reports “just the facts” from all angles. In some instances, what is reported are blatant and bold-faced lies. Even then, one wonders if the refuted “facts” are true? The cry, “fake news” is in itself fake news.

How do we cut through to the truth? Is it like my trying to entangle the morning glory from my butterfly bush? Will there be loss of integrity in the process? Do I just let the morning glories stay entwined and not pull it out until the fall? There is a parable by Jesus: a farmer planted wheat and unbeknownst to the farmer, his enemy went at night and planted weeds among the seeds. When the wheat sprung up, so did the weeds. When the farmer was asked if the weeds should be pulled, the farmer replied to wait until the harvest lest the wheat plant be pulled up along with the weed.

In discovering truth we might have to pull the weeds and suffer damage- as was the case with Mrs. Wilson. Innocent people can get hurt when the truth is exposed. Yet we know that the truth sets us free. It frees us from guilt and shame. It can set us up for forgiveness- both to be forgiven and to forgive.

At other times we need to let things be, let the weeds and the wheat develop, to wait until harvest time when the true plant (truth) can be separated from the weeds (lies) which will then be destroyed. Sometimes by waiting, the true nature of the situation or person is exposed without having to try and convince another about it. Like the old adage, “The truth will come out in the wash,” in the due process of time, truth will be revealed.

It still can be difficult to stay the course for truth, both in our individual lives and in our society because lies by nature and definition, are very close to the truth. It is hard to ferret it out. For myself, I try to use Biblical teaching as my litmus test to Truth- what does God say about the current situation, specifically and/or fundamentally? What is the true motivation behind the story? What is being camouflaged? What is the emotional, “fluff” of the discussion? What is the essence of what is reported?

What about you? How do you suss out the truth? Do you pull out it regardless of the cost? Has there been collateral damage in the process? Have you been set free by truth? What lies have you heard? What lies have you told? What information with the passing of time have you found to be true or not?

One thing that always occurs to me as I am weeding: if I had kept on top of the weeding from the beginning, I would have destroyed them when they were manageable. That is the other thing with lies. They need to be stopped as soon as they are uttered. If not, they will grow and grow until there is no other recourse than to destroy everything.

Honoring Others

Last summer we had our nephew and family visit with us at our little cottage. As typical of siblings, my nephew’s two children were squabbling. The older brother was annoyed with his younger sister and with her taking some toys he wanted to use. My niece-in-law patiently chided her son telling him that 1) when he was hoarding the item, what was he conveying to his sister about its importance? and 2) the relationship with his sister is more important than the item.

Not only was I duly impressed with my niece’s mothering skills (alas, there were many a day when my mothering was not so calm) but I also recognized that she was conveying to her children a wonderful life lesson: people are more important than things.

This week I heard someone comment on an article she had read. The details of the article are lost to me but the essence was that in the day of quick opinions and responses through social media, never forget that the person behind the opinion is more important than the opinion.

I think as a society we need to remember relationships. Ironically we are in a time of history when we can develop more relationships and contact with people than ever before. Yet, more and more people feel distant and abuse the relationships that they have. People are so quick to dismiss one another with a push of a button. We live in an era where we have much discretionary time and money. We do not have to be on guard every second of the day for attacks from other tribes or animals. We do not have to spend every minute hunting, gathering and preparing for our next meal. One would think that we would have enough time to develop deep relationships, yet we seem to fail at that. Rather we collect relationships as if they were something that could be bought and sold.

If we view relationships as another commodity, how do we go about rectifying that? How do we go about building those relationships? How do we remember that people, not opinions, not things, not even actions are the most important item in this world? How do we go about honoring people?

In honoring someone, I recognize God in them. I recognize they have been made by God, that they have received the same grace from God as I and that while I may not agree or even like them, I can still celebrate their humanness.

Here are some interesting suggestions I found on ways to honor one another:

• Listen

• Do not jump to conclusions

• Keep an open mind

• Ask questions

• Be patient

• Find common ground

• Be compassionate

• Be empathetic

• “Live” in another’s shoes for a while

• Forgive

• Extend grace

What about you? How do you view relationships? How do you honor others?

I like the below quotes. If one thinks before she speaks, then the attitude and feeling one conveys is one of honor and respect for the other person.

Before one speaks, THINK: Is it True? Is it Helpful? Is it Inspiring? Is it Necessary? Is it Kind?

I have heard the following quote many times by many different people. It both comforts me (I truly hope that at times people have forgotten what I said and did) and frightens me. (How I hope that regardless of my speech and actions, those who are around me would feel encouraged and good about themselves.)

I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel. ~ Maya Angelou

A Fork in the Tree

These last couple of weeks we have been spending time with our one son before he embarks on the journey of medical school. It has been an enjoyable time. One day, we took our dogs and hiked through the beautiful mountainside of Catoctin Mountain Park.

Hiking along the trail we came across a tree. It had grown in a split fashion due to an adjacent tree falling into the two shoots of the main tree. The park ranger or whomever cleared the fallen tree from the trail must’ve cut it off but not removed the dead tree completely. Consequently the living tree continued to grow but just grew around the approximate two foot branch. It looked like a thorn in the flesh of the tree.

I was struck with the analogy of life. Sometimes for no fault of ours, things fall or land in our growth path. We might have been going along and then, either a storm of life, negligence on someone else’s part, poor maintenance or just an accident- things fall into our path and could potentially take us down.

What I liked about this tree was that the tree just continued on- growing around the offending branch. The “thorn” became part of it. In fact, it distinguishes itself from any other tree in the woods by its scar of the thorn. Of course, the tree cannot remove the fallen branch- there had to be some type of help.

I think of different situations in my life and in the lives of friends and acquaintances. Are we defeated by our thorns or distinguished by them? Does the thorn define us? To set us apart in a good or bad way? Are we growing despite the thorn or are we at a stand-still? Has the thorn stunted our growth or even more tragically, caused our death (spiritually, emotionally, relationally) in some way? All our experiences, whether we acknowledge or not, shape our growth and trajectory.

What about you? Do you have a thorn in your life? How is that impacting how you live? Do you need someone to help you remove the fallen tree, to cut the majority of it out of your life? Can you leave the thorn in place and continue to grow? Is the thorn stifling you?

Which way are you going to go if you have a fork in your tree?

More arduous a trail than expected but our final leg brought us to this stream…

One Goal

The other day I heard an educator speaking about what parents can do this summer in light of the COVID-19 home “schooling”. She suggested that parents along with their children determine one goal that the child would achieve over the summer. It needs to be age appropriate, doable and achievable. The thought that having a goal (or perhaps more- but do them one at a time) is good for building structure into children’s lives.

I was thinking that having one goal this summer might be good for adults as well. And if we have any young people in our lives perhaps have the goal together: read a book together and discuss via facetime, zoom or the old fashion way- letter writing; take an online class together; design a memory book- share stories and pictures from your childhood. The possibilities are endless. The goals might be practical or might be things you always wanted to learn to do. In learning a new skill, focus on one aspect of it. For example, if learning how to sew, plan on making decorative bedroom pillows as a way to learn stitching.

Some suggestions of goals for children and adults:

• Learn a language or at least some basic phrases (high achieving- at least it is for me!).

• Read one book a week or any other determined number.

• Learn to cook a favorite meal, bake cookies, or properly chop and use of kitchen tools.

• Learn to ride a bike or a new swim stroke.

• Learn how to write a letter. (how to address the envelope, salutation, etc.)

• Learn how to balance a check book, make a budget.

• Learn how to sew or any other handiwork: knit, crochet, needlepoint.

• Learn a new-to-you board game. Try “Go”, allegedly the oldest board game, mahjong, chess, cribbage, backgammon.

• Plant a garden: raise some type of vegetable, fruit or flowers.

• Take an artist challenge. Click here for a fun- 21 day artist challenge.

• Explore the world through video- whole host of vignettes for adults and children on Viking cruise website. Click here.

• Take an electronic sabbatical ala Bill Gates for a week- “unplug” from emails, screen time, etc.

• For the overachievers, our son introduced us to these amazing youtube videos of a gentleman who does everything by hand. His channel is a “cooking” channel, but the food aspect is nothing compared to his preparation for the meal. For instance, there is a cooked fish video which is all about his making a waterproof hat (splitting the bamboo and weaving it) in order to sit in the rain to catch the fish. Click here to watch him build a stone grill.

What about you? What things would you like to explore this summer? What can you do together with your family or friends?

One goal. One summer

Ironing the Grass

We have a push mower to mow our small lawn. While I know that it doesn’t provide the “best” cut for the grass, it does work for us- no carbon footprint, great exercise and easy to store and move up and down the steps. A beautifully cut grass done by 2-cycle engine does set off a flower bed but I am not willing to give up the benefits of the push mower. (As a disclaimer, we do have a gas engine mower to use exclusively during the fall when our neighbor’s honey locust tree drops an incredible amount of needle-like leaves- designed to not be raked or picked up by human hands.)

As I was mowing our front lawn I was musing on a comment a friend had remarked. She and her husband live in a row home not far from us. Her front lawn is truly the classic postage stamp size- very small square. Push mowers are quite practical for those types of homes- easily portable and store well. If you live in the middle of a row home not on the end unit, one either has to take the lawn mower through the house to get from back to front or walk all around the block in order to mow both the front and back yards.

For many years, her husband used to mow the grass with a push mower. Whether or not they regularly had the blade sharpened, I do not know. Only after he would mow the grass would she comment, “Congratulations, you just ironed the front lawn.” The mower and his subsequent walking would push down the blades, only to pop back up a little while later.

I have noticed that there are certain blades of grass that stubbornly will not be cut by the push mower, or at least not on the first pass. I find that I have to tackle it by passing over that spot in a different direction.

Recently I was spray painting a found wicker chest. Our one neighbor was getting rid of it and it is a perfect size for our beach deck although it needed a coat of white spray paint. I soon discovered that one can was not enough- to provide the best coverage, I needed four! Anytime I spray paint a piece of wicker, I am always amazed at the surface area and the amount of paint one needs. It is not enough to make one pass at it. I have to paint it numerous times from different directions and angles.

It made me think of how we manage problems or difficulties. Sometimes we need a new way to tackle a situation. Trying to solve an issue in the same manner as we have always done, might not work. We might need to start looking at it from a different angle. We might then need to tackle the problem in a different way or from a different direction and make multiple passes to achieve a solution.

I am wondering if that is not the same with the police/Black Lives Matter movement. Certainly we cannot respond in the same way as we have always done- we need to look at the problem of injustice, privilege, safety, law and order from a different angle. Perhaps we need to try a different approach like learning more from a different point of view. Not that we have to embrace that viewpoint, but be open to understanding or learning more. As I say about health care decisions, getting another medical opinion or more testing doesn’t mean that one is going to go down a certain plan of care, it just means that one is getting more information for a more informed decision.

What about you? How are you in looking at difficult situations or ongoing problems? Do you find yourself in a rut? Painting the same area over and over yet leaving other areas uncovered? Are you ironing grass?

GPS

The other week I was returning home from our beach place. I had decided to stop by our son’s apartment and drop off some items to him. Curbside drop off/ pick up if you will.

While his apartment is not too far off the highway, it usually takes a while due to heavy traffic congestion in the Metropolitan NY area. Not so last week. There were hardly any cars on the road and so my trip was quite uneventful.

Except that the GPS gave me different directions to go. I guess the GPS determines the fastest route. In this case the GPS instructed me to go through the Lincoln Tunnel. Usually I avoid that at all costs: stop and go traffic, potential for rear-endings, pressure of cars going every which way on the city streets and having to quickly navigate turns. In the past there was no way I would go through NYC during the middle of the day. But, it really is the shortest route and without all the cars, the quickest. So I thought, now is the time to see how quick it would be.

The thing with the GPS, it only gives one direction at a time. For example, “turn right in 200 feet…” For a person who likes to see the big and overall picture, it can be a little unnerving. Usually if someone else is in the car, I will ask, “How many exits before ours? How many streets until the next turn?” I can ask for alternative suggestions, “What’s the traffic like- can we can turn down this side street to avoid that traffic light?” I just do not want to be caught unprepared.

With no one else in the car except for the GPS, I had to trust the direction it was giving me. I couldn’t look beyond the few turns that I had to make. Either I trusted the information I received or I went “off map” and risked the possibility of getting incredibly lost- losing time and potentially money (if I crossed the Hudson a couple of times).

What a timely reminder to me about trust in these days of uncertainty.

The Bible says, ”Thy word is a lamp unto my feet and a light unto my path. God gives us directions on how to traverse. His words are the guidance on how to step and where to go. Because the words in the Bible are from a living God, they are true and applicable today as they were when first uttered.

If you have ever used a lamp, candle or flashlight to get around in the dark, you may have noticed that if you are using it to illuminate your steps, you can only see so far in front of you. You have to take one step at a time and concentrate on those steps. You can wave the flashlight in front of you to see ahead but usually that doesn’t provide any guidance and can potentially trip you up as there is no light for the immediate next steps.

We have little solar lights on the side of our outside steps leading from one area of the backyard to another. They only illuminate the steps and not any other larger swath of garden. It is just enough to see in front of me by a couple of steps. But if the solar charger is blocked- by either plant overgrowth, cloudy day or faulty battery, I do not get any appreciable light. It all depends on the source (strong sunlight and rechargeable batteries) for the power.

As we travel through life, we have to be discerning about who is guiding us, what is being told us, where it is leading, how we are to proceed and why we choose to go the way we go.

I have decided to be guided by God, His promptings, leadings and His plan and purpose for my journey. I trust (and obey) the path that God has laid. I cannot get too focused on the future, wondering or worrying about what lies ahead. I need to stay focused on my immediate steps. And while I may wonder about the condition of the path at times (too bumpy, rugged or hard) I know that if I stay on His path, I will be headed in the right direction.

It is when I decide to go “off-track” is when I have difficulty. When I decide that I do not need a guide or any guidance about my life is when I find myself wasting time and resources, similarly to my not wanting to listen to the GPS.

In being guided on my life journey by God through the Bible and prayer, I also need to take care that I do not allow my light source to be overshadowed by something that will block that guidance. How easy it is for the time constraints of life to envelope my daily Bible reading or prayer time, much like the Bishop’s week ground cover is creeping over my solar lights. For my lights to work effectively, I need to be vigilant and prune around the lights. So too, in my spiritual life, I may find that there are times when I have to scale back on activities that do not allow me enough time to keep plugged to the source.

It is a daily decision and struggle to stay plugged to the source, to not look too far ahead and to trust that each step and turn is where God is leading.

What about you? Where do you receive your life’s guidance and direction? What/Who is your life’s GPS?

20/20

I find it ironic that this year is “twenty-twenty”. Like the “perfect” eyesight. Because we are so far from perfect with our sight- both individually and collectively as a society. If anything, this year has showcased how myopic we are. We are only concerned about ourselves and our immediate needs. We are blind to what is happening to those around us. I must admit that I am. I live less than ten miles from some of the most troubled areas in the country. Yet to see the community in which I live, you would never know that.

While I do not have any understanding of the trials and tribulations that my brown and black skin brothers and sisters experience, I can still stand with them. I do not have to act with blinders on to the injustice that is happening around us.

On Sunday, while riding our bicycles down into the city my husband and I stumbled upon a peaceful protest. The organizers asked all the participants to say out loud the names of those individuals who have suffered under injustice. We then stood with our hands up on our heads for 8 minutes and 46 seconds. Powerful stuff.

20/20. When we do not see as well, they say other senses take over like our hearing or sense of smell. While we are blind to happenings, we cannot also be deaf to the voices who are calling for justice.

In some ways the true issue is being drowned out by those focusing on the looting (and I am certainly NOT advocating destruction of property or stealing) and those “messing their nests”. As I have noted before, I still recall the frustration I have experienced with either telephone or cable customer service. The feeling that no one is listening to you, responding to you even noticing you, much less the frustration of being ineffective for change is enough to enrage anyone. And that is just the feeling I get after a mere phone call with Xfinity. I cannot even fathom what that must feel like after years upon years upon years of deaf ears.

Such a complicated issue. Racism, privilege, injustice are all sins of this world. Sins that affect everyone. Sins that we do not see initially.

When one is myopic (as I am), one needs corrective lenses to see correctly. (Preferably, not rose colored ones either.)

When I first had difficulty seeing, the letters on the school chalkboard were fuzzy. I could make do for a while- figuring out words by context but when I couldn’t see the French chalkboard- that was a different story. There couldn’t be any guess work, speculation or context clues because I didn’t know French. I had no point of reference and had to admit that I needed to see an eye doctor.

Upon going to the doctor’s office, I had to go through a series of tests to determine the extent of my sight loss and the correct corrective lens. I had to learn how to use and care for my contacts (and to some extent my glasses) And in receiving glasses or contacts, I must wear them if I want to be able to see clearly.

As a nation and as an individual, I think we all need a good check-up. To admit that we are not seeing correctly and that we need some assistance. For many of us, we do not have any context clues to help us- this is an area to which we have no point of reference. For others, we may have been muddling on for so long that we do not even realize how limited and shortsighted our vision has become.

I heard a suggestion from Robin Diangelo, the author of White Fragility who said one way to understand and “see” our brown and black brothers and sisters is to listen to them- to read their books, listen to their podcasts and keep an open mind as we gather information. I found the following website that offers loads of resources to read, listen and learn. Click here for a 21-Day Racial Equity Challenge.

I am intrigued to know more. I realize that I have no point of reference about this issue. I am totally myopic and in need of corrective lenses. Or at the very least, more information about my blindspots.

What about you? How do you feel about the latest incidences? Have you noticed something you hadn’t before?

How is your eyesight? 20/20?

Nailing It

I am not a carpenter. Not by a long stretch. I regret that I didn’t take wood shop in junior high school. Not that it was encouraged for girls to do so. Only the rebels or really cool girls (which I wasn’t) insisted on wood and metal shop. The rest of us dutifully made muffins everyday in home economics. How I wish I had some understanding of building. I love all things wood. I think I mostly love the smell of freshly cut wood.

Ironically my father was an industrial arts professor- he was an educator for shop teachers. While my parents always told me I could do anything I put my mind to, my dad still had some traditional values. Hence the home economics.

This week I decided I wanted to add a small bench to one of my gardens. More of an architectural feature rather than a set down for a spell kind of seat. I challenged myself to use up wood that we had around the house. I gathered my supplies- hand saw, measuring tape, hammer, nails, wood for the legs and the board for the seat. I needed to cut up a long piece of wood into the four legs. I dutifully measured (twice) and started the job. Because I was using a hand saw, it took me a while performing all kinds of gyrations to saw through the wood: I alternated my arms, made preliminary cuts as a groove, bent over the piece close to the ground (thinking gravity would help me?), finally moved the whole operation to a table.

Eventually I had my legs and was ready to nail to the board. I had the whole thing envisioned in my mind. It should go smoothly. Right? Wrong. I started nailing remembering to use the weight of the hammer to drive the nail rather than muscle the motion. However, try as I might, the nail entered the wood slightly off center. By the time I noticed, the nail had entered the board and was exiting in a spot from where I thought it would. It only took a slight angle to have the 1 1/2 inch nail be completely off where it needed to be.

As I was nailing I was thinking about this quarantine. Some habits of mine have drifted from where I intended. For one, I have found some pants not fitting! We do not own a scale in our home. Haven’t for years. I have always gone by the fit of my clothing and how I feel in gauging weight. Not that I have ever really focused on it.

Well. Between my inactivity of my wrist surgeries and the corona virus quarantine, I found a pair of pants that had been loose in the fall be a little tight this spring. Bother! I had veered slightly off course. Nothing major because the weight gain isn’t large but I definitely do not feel good and I know that at my age if I do not keep on top of it, the muffin top will prevail. I just need to get back to exercising.

Isn’t it true of life that we go along not noticing slight changes but soon enough- our pants don’t fit or the nail has protruded off the side rather than straight across. The thing is, we can always regroup, reset, realign.

So too have I wandered from my spiritual practices. I have not been faithful with my daily Bible reading nor with my wanting to be in community. Kind of correlates to the wrist breakage. Silly as it might be, I think I was upset with God over it- stupid to blame God for my accident but sometimes we do not have rational thoughts. So to show Him how I feel, I stopped reading His word regularly and meeting with others. Talk about cutting off your nose to spite your face. The thing that I need, I reject. The apostle Paul talks about it in the book of Romans: “I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate.”

One of the greatest gifts from God is that we can always return to Him. “Draw near to God and He will draw near to you.” I need to stop what I am doing and realign myself with God, to readjust my thinking and my direction. I know that once I get back to my daily reading, my other disciplines will fall into place- I will be able to reset my exercise and eating habits.

What about you? How have you fared during this quarantine time? Were you able to practice healthy physical and spiritual habits? What are they? How do they work into your day? Or do you need to commit to returning?

And that bench. I have set it aside until I figure out something different. That is how life is sometimes. Sometimes we “nail it” and sometimes we don’t. We just have to keep working at it.

Post Pandemic Life

Is your life going back to “normal”? I know of some friends who are able to go back to work- albeit in a different setting with different protocols. One person works in an office. He has to be in his individual office with the door closed at all times. If he rides the elevator, only 1 person allowed on the elevator at a time. There is no use of common spaces- coffee maker, break room. Even our little tennis club has an elaborate procedure to use the small restroom- 1 person at a time; take a spray bottle of disinfectant with you (also doubles as a “hall pass” to let others know that the bathroom is occupied), spray down the area before and after use. When returning the spray bottle, you need to wipe off the bottle with hand wipes.

The grocery stores still have their lines and still are limiting customers. No more times of just a quick run to the store to pick up a loaf of bread. In some stores the “greeter” checks to see that you are wearing your mask properly- no nasal exposure. She clicks your presence into her counter as another body in the store. If one needs a shopping cart, it is expected to either use the one offered from the “cart wiper” or self-wipe the cart. Arrows point to which direction you can walk. The store aisles have turned into a one-way street grid system. Shopping has become a carefully planned and choreographed outing. At this point, we are not “going back” to anything. Instead we are creating a new “normal” of behavioral living.

As some businesses and social activities are opening back up, the participation opportunities of pre-quarantine activities are rolling in. Not that I mind them per se, it is just that I have gotten used to this stay-at-home order. While I do not like the idea of the quarantine limiting my freedom, I do like the permission the stay-at-home order has given me to not have to perform any obligations or duties. “Sorry, can’t do that. Government says I cannot.”

The more society is “getting back to normal” and my schedule is “getting back to normal” the more I feel anxious about my time. I am feeling panicky that my writing work time will be swallowed up by obligations that have been on hiatus. This quarantine has given me insight into my working day and what I need to do to be productive. I am afraid that without the “excuse” of a pandemic I will not be strong and protective in guarding my time. I am not ready to relinquish the unhampered schedule. As things are letting up, I feel that I am kind of missing the corona virus quarantine. Is this a mutation of the Stockholm Syndrome- the condition in which hostages develop a psychological alliance with their captors during captivity? Am I developing an alliance, a preference for being isolated? Or, am I becoming agoraphobic?

Once again, as it seems to be my refrain, balance is key. And while I like the unhurried atmosphere of these past couple of months, I also like having goals, plans and a relative schedule. (I think I have shared before) But I finally have come to realize that, while I do like to design a schedule, I very rarely actually follow a specific schedule for too long.

Ironically, it is through this unhurried, stay-at-home pandemic, that I have learned that laser-type focusing- at the expense of all other concentration- is key in creative pursuits. One would think that being so focused would be part of a controlled schedule yet it was in this unplanned time that I have been most productive.

But the balance to laser-type focusing is to also have diffuse thinking. There are the times when one’s mind needs to wander, explore and make random connections. One’s thoughts need to stretch, lengthen, linger or curl around ideas. Mind meanderings are a good balance to concentrated focusing.

Balance is also key in caregiving- of others and of ourselves. We need to physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually care for ourselves There are times when we have to care for our own needs at the exclusion of others. Yet mostly we need to balance our needs with the caring for the physical, mental, emotional and spiritual needs of others. Because in caring for others, we are tending to our emotional need to be empathetic. It is just a question of timing- in the different seasons of our lives we may be more laden in one area or with one person or obligation than another.

Just this morning I had a conversation with a friend discussing the balance of time: how does one spontaneously enjoy the moment yet still accomplish plans and feel that one’s days are purposeful? Stop and smell the roses is the old saying but one has to design, plant and care for the garden before there can be roses to sniff.

What about you? Are you anxious, panicky about “getting back to normal”? Is it for health safety? Due to our lack of vaccines or treatments for the virus? Have ideas or priorities changed for you during this pandemic? Are you anxious to return to the lifestyle that you had pre-quarantine? Will you miss the lifestyle to which you have become accustomed in quarantine? What kind of balance do you see in your life? What kind of life will you live, post-pandemic?

Climbing Stairs

Twice now in the last week, while I was walking up the basement steps carrying the laundry basket I experienced an odd sensation of not knowing where the next step was located. The basket had occluded my vision and so as I stepped up I was not really seeing where I was going. I just stepped where I thought was the next step. Even though I had enough lighting to see where I was going, I still couldn’t quite see the path.

It made me think of our walking through this pandemic. While we may carry on the best way we know how, there are still obstacles that prevent us from knowing if where we once trod is still the right footing. We go through the motions but our vision and our footing has shifted- Our understanding of staying healthy has changed. Our gathering space is different. Our priorities are rearranged. Our time lines and schedules are obsolete.

I am thinking of how the pandemic has shifted my focus. Things about which I used to be concerned have no place in my mind’s eye now. For that I am grateful. I realized how much time and energy I have spent on mundane and shallow thoughts. When I start fretting about insignificant ideas, I remind myself that in the long run, in light of the pandemic life/death scenario, these thoughts are not worth the time.

The pandemic has underscored my need to be following God in faith. No one and nothing else can guide me safely along.

I find that I have to walk by faith and not by sight (2 Corinthians 5: 7). I have to trust God in and with my future plans and I have to learn (and relearn) what God’s path is for me. Circumstances may obscure my vision but I have to trust God where I place my next step. As many times as I may say this- I still have to remind myself daily to trust God.

The thing about stepping in faith is that the more we do it, the easier it becomes. I couldn’t tell you how many times I have walked up and down our basement steps in the twenty five years we have lived in our home. Yet, I am familiar with each step- each creak, worn wood, height from one to another. While I wouldn’t intentionally do it, I could blindly walk up and down them as they are so familiar.

What about you? Have you ever been limited by what you have seen and not seen? What was that experience like? What did you learn from it? How are you walking by faith? Stumbling? Sure-footed?

What have you gleaned?

I like the word to glean: to learn, discover, or find out, usually little by little or slowly. While I am usually quick in actions and thoughts, I find that for life lessons I am a “ponderer” and gleaner. I discover things little by little, hold on to those idea nuggets and then mull them over much like a cow chewing her cud. I am a ruminator by nature.

I have been thinking about this virus now that we appear to be moving (slightly) out of it. What will be learned from it? What will we glean? What will we discover about ourselves, others and society?

Things that I have gleaned from this time and therefore would like to continue in the future:

1) Slowing down/non-rushed: In activities. In scheduling. In relationships. I really like the non-rushed feeling: I can sort out my thoughts and plans without feeling that a time bomb is looming over my head. What I will need to figure out is how to balance that feeling of time has no-consequence with the onslaught of responsibility that will happen as soon as things “open up”.

2) Reducing and reusing: With our shut-down of retail stores and the decrease in consumer spending, there has been the national necessity to reduce and reuse what one has. This has always been right up my alley- using things up and finding practical solutions to repurpose household items. While this idea is always on my mind, the virus time has validated and reconfirmed my commitment to live under my means.

3) Communicating more with family and friends: I have discovered long, deep conversations with people- neighbors, friends or even strangers. There is an overall sense of “we are all in this together” and that there is no pressing matter other than connecting with one another.

4) Expressing gratitude for each day: While I am grateful generally, this pandemic has heightened my awareness even more. It has shown that it is so important to think as well as speak about one’s gratitude every day- especially to the individuals for whom one is grateful.

I just pray that we hold these ideas in our hearts and that we ruminate on them- bring them up to ponder and to implement- every so often. Yet, knowing how forgetful humans are, we will most probably revert back to our fast-paced lifestyles. We will be slow at first but it won’t take too long before we are warp speed ahead for work and play. The following video clip you might have already seen. (Was texted it by a good friend.) It captures the idea of thinking about what will we glean (and possibly change) from our current experience?

Click here for The Great Realization

What about you? What things from this 2020 experience do you want to glean? To remember? To continue even when we are post-pandemic?

Prayer Warriors

Warrior : A person engaged in some struggle or conflict; a person who shows or has shown great vigor, courage, or aggressiveness, as in politics or athletics.

Prayer warriors. In some ways it seems contradictory. Prayer conjures up peace, meditation, stillness, calm, while a warrior draws to mind, combativeness, aggression, chaos.

This past week another prayer warrior from our congregation has died. She joins a long line of saints who have gone on to Heaven before her. She was among a group of women who were formidable in their faith. Faithful in prayer. Committed to God’s word. Dedicated to sharing their faith with others through their words and deeds.

Called prayer warriors for their willingness to pray faithfully, earnestly, relentlessly, fearlessly. I think of them as lions for prayer- strong and courageous. I would hope that I could be a prayer warrior but some days I think of myself as a prayer kitten-skittish and scared.

The women and men that I know who are deep, strong pray-ers are, in some ways unremarkable. There is no special sign on their door, no special degree on their wall nor special look to their appearance. They are ordinary people who have chosen to rely on Someone else for their guidance and control of their lives. They know that in order to handle the anxiety, disappointments, stress, tragedies, evil in this world, prayer is the activity that is absolutely necessary.

Not that prayer is a magic pill. It is not, “say these incantations” and all will be well. Prayer is an honest, heart felt, sometimes heart wrenching conversation, plea, discussion even argument with the Creator of this world. It is also an opportunity to express our gratitude, praise as well as our concerns and petitions for others.

The women I know who are prayer warriors have experienced life in all its joys and sorrows. They have gone through Hell on earth yet know that it is only through prayer that they can carry on, survive and thrive. They know that it is only through prayer that we can do any good for others. They know that it is only through prayer that they will find peace.

On Sunday, one of our church members was sharing about her faith and her experience with prayer and anxiety and talked about Paul’s letter to the Philippians. She suggested that adding thanksgiving alongside with our petitions is a good mental health practice. The brain chemistry changes when we practice gratitude.

Yes. We should come to God with all of our problems, disappointments, hurts and sorrows but we also are well served if we come to God with our thanksgivings.

Just yesterday I was getting myself all anxious about the future. I think I had overloaded on Corona virus news. (Yes. Yes. I know. “Physician heal thyself”- I have written before about limiting the listening to that stuff!) I could feel my heart tightening, my belly churning and my breath becoming more rapid and shallow.

I took a deep breath and started talking out loud to God. Sharing my thoughts as they came as well as adding a praise word every so often. Funny thing, my one praise word, led to another and then to thoughts of things for which I was grateful. That one word led to a cascade of all sorts of thanksgiving.

What about you? How is your prayer life? Are you a prayer lion or kitten? Have you found prayer helpful in your life? If so, is it a continued practice? Do you talk to God about all things in your life- the good, the bad, the ugly? Why or why not?

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.  And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. “(Philippians 4: 6,7)

One of my favorite quotes from Corrie ten Boom: “Any concern too small to be turned into a prayer is too small to be made into a burden.” If only I can remember it!!!

How I suspect my prayer posture looks like…

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Yesterday my article, “Honor Thy Father” was published as a guest author on The Caregivers Space website.

Day 30: Words and Pictures: Blessing

Blessing: “the act or words of a person who blesses. a special favor, mercy, or benefit: a favor or gift bestowed by God, thereby bringing happiness. the invoking of God's favor upon a person: praise; devotion; worship, especially grace said before a meal: approval or good wishes”.

Are you a blessing to others? Do your actions provide a benefit to someone else?

We may not feel like we are a blessing to one another but each one of us has the potential. It doesn’t take much effort. After all, we may have already unbeknownst been a blessing through a kind word, a simple text, a thank you for small action or gift, a timely smile. Just think of small gestures that have touched your own heart, given you a smile, or put a little spring in your step. All those small things that bless us.

We also have the potential to bless others in larger ways to through the sharing of our resources-time, talents, treasure. Sometimes the larger ways demand more intentionality but like priming the pump- once we start, it becomes easier for our blessings to spill out to others.

We become part of a circle of blessing: We are blessed by God with good fortune, health, shelter. We can bless others because we have been blessed. They in turn bless others, etc, etc. All the blessings that we share with one another are a way to bless and thank God. As a parent, it warms my heart when I see our boys share with others their good fortune, when they bless and are a blessing to others.

What about you? Have you ever thought about blessings? Or is it something that you say before a holiday meal? Have you ever thought that the Creator of the world wants to bless you? And that God encourages you to bless others? What would that look like in your life?

Thank you for joining me on a 30 day journey of encouragement and inspiration using words and pictures. Thank you to those who sent me messages. They were words of blessing and encouragement to me. If I could be with each one of you I would offer you a hug of encouragement: Do not lose heart. Do not let the difficulties, the fears, the evil of this world sap your joy, your future, your life. Hang in there. Offer support and encouragement to others. We need one another more than ever.

Be a blessing today to someone else.

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Some words that I pray would bless and encourage you today:

Numbers 6: 24-26: The Lord bless you and keep you; the Lord make his face shine on you and be gracious to you; 26 the Lord turn his face toward you and give you peace.

Psalm 121: I lift up my eyes to the mountains—where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth. He will not let your foot slip— he who watches over you will not slumber; indeed, he who watches over Israel will neither slumber nor sleep. The Lord watches over you— the Lord is your shade at your right hand; the sun will not harm you by day, nor the moon by night. The Lord will keep you from all harm—he will watch over your life; the Lord will watch over your coming and going both now and forevermore.

One of the health care workers for my mother-in-law and I have found a common interest in our love of God. She shared this youtube song with me. I like to just listen to the audio as I meditate. I offer it to you as my prayer for you. Click here to listen.

See you next week- when we return to Wednesday’s at the Well.

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• Click here to learn more about this work of art.

Day 29: Words and Pictures: Joy

Joy: “a feeling of great happiness; success or satisfaction.”

Joy and its synonyms- delight, bliss, felicity are some of my favorite words. What is not part of the definitions is the state in which joy may occur- joy may be present regardless of circumstances.

Contrary to many of the definitions, I also think that joy is not happiness although the feelings might seem the same, just like a thermostat is not a thermometer although both determine temperature.

A thermometer responds to the temperature around it. If the temperature is warm, the mercury rises. If it is cold, it plummets. Much like happiness. We are happy when our surroundings are pleasant, situations are hopeful, or our health is relatively good. We can become unhappy or miserable if we do not feel well, if we feel hopeless or if times are tough. Just like the outside temperature determines the response of the mercury, the outside conditions of life can determine if we are happy.

On the other hand, a thermostat controls the temperature of the surroundings. It determines the degree of heat or air conditioning that is needed to flow in order to achieve a preset room temperature. It is not controlled by its external surroundings but is internally controlling the temperature. Much like joy.

Joy is a preset state of mind. We sometimes have to choose joy first, before we “feel” it. Joy happens when you are least aware of it or least wanting it to occur. I have heard of many people say that even in the middle of a difficult crisis or struggle there is a peace and joy in their heart.

I know that there have been times when if I just went by the chaotic external circumstances of life I could be justifiably miserable but because I had chosen to concentrate on joy, I felt surprisingly at peace. I wouldn’t say that I am an ebullient (cheerful, full of energy) individual all the time, but my nature leans more towards that than not. Partly it could be my personality, upbringing, etc. But I think a good part of it is because God is in control of my life and that gives me a peace that passes all understanding. I wouldn’t be so bold as to say that I feel that way all the time. Everyday it is the daily sanctification of choosing God in my life, of choosing God’s will over my own, of trusting God with all the details of my life, of letting God control my “thermostat” and of choosing joy.

“Jesus did not promise to change the circumstances around us. He promised great peace and pure joy to those who would learn to believe that God actually controls all things.” ~ Corrie ten Boom. (Survivor of the Holocaust, went on to become one of the great saints in this world, an inspirational speaker and author.)

“Joy is the settled assurance that God is in control of all the details of my life, the quiet confidence that ultimately everything is going to be alright, and the determined choice to praise God in every situation.” ~Rick Warren. (Pastor and author who is not a stranger to struggles and tragedy.)

What about you? Are you a thermometer or thermostat? Happy? Or joy-filled? In the middle of all this individual, national and global uncertainty, who do you think is in control?

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Because of copyright, I wouldn’t post a picture of Henri Matisse’s Joy of Life (Le Bonheur de Vivre). Click here to see an interesting video about it.

Click here for more information about Corrie ten Boom.

Click here for more information about Rick Warren and to read his daily devotional.

Day 28: Words and Pictures: Peace

Peace. freedom from disturbance; tranquility. The Bible’s definition: šālôm, translated in the Septuagint most often by the Greek word, eirēnē, has a wide semantic range including the notions of totality or completeness, success, fulfillment, wholeness, harmony, security and well being. 

Are you at peace today? In looking at the words of the definition- tranquility, security, well being, it would appear through social media, news reports and anecdotally through my own discussions with friends and family, that most people are feeling at odds and not peaceful at all.

I find peace to be paradoxical. There are times when I should be anxious and unsettled and I am not. I feel calm and peaceful. When there is a big crisis or problem, I can be clear headed, compartmentalize what needs to be done and dive right in. I wouldn’t say that I am the best in crisis and I would never boast about it (partly for fear that through some cosmic whammy I would be given a whopper of a problem) but I have experienced and witnessed enough to know that I could (and have) survive(d) through some big issues.

At other times, the littlest pebble of disruption will ripple my still pond. I get anxious, upset and irritable. Those days I do not handle the small things well. AT ALL. There is no peace in my life (and I am afraid in my household) on those days.

How do we cultivate peace? How can we be free from disturbances in our minds and actions? How do we promote peace? To move toward wholeness and harmony?

For me it is all about my faith. Not in me or anything I can do but in God and what He has and can do. It is all about letting go of control.

This pandemic has taught me a bunch of lessons and one of the biggest is about control. In some ways the big things are easier for me to relinquish control. Since there is no way I can do anything about circumstances, like the spread of the corona virus and subsequent shut-down of society, I am for the most part not worrying about it. But, the small things like planning when/if we can travel to our Cape house to get it ready to rent this summer is something about which I am unsettled. It is hard for me to just let things go and unfold without my “input” and not have a plan which I have constructed.

I am comforted by the words of Jesus: “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid.” When I trust that God has things in control- both big and small- I am at peace. The peace that Jesus gives us is the shalom, the wellbeing and harmony of being reconciled with God. Part of that reconciliation is recognizing that we are not perfect people and we cannot have peace within ourselves or others apart from God.

It is not a once and done thing. It is a daily sanctification of choosing to let God be in control, to let Him be the guide and in charge of my thoughts, actions and reactions. It is letting Jesus’ peace seep into my very marrow. It is being, at times, counter intuitive to what the world says: trust no one, look out for #1, do whatever it takes to survive, you are in control. The thing is, that type of thinking only makes us anxious and disturbed because sooner or later we will realize that we cannot control life, that we need one another and that looking out for only ourselves (and doing whatever we want and not being considerate of others) is very lonely and potentially deadly (as this virus has shown).

While Jesus also reminded his followers that there will be trouble and difficulties in this life, the ideal of a peaceable kingdom can begin now- heaven on earth until such time when there will be a new heaven and earth. I can be part of the building of that peaceable kingdom by offering shalom to others: to aid one another in achieving wholeness, to promote harmony among people, to encourage each one of us to be reconciled with God.

What about you? Peaceful today? In this moment that I am writing this post, I can say that I do feel at peace. While I know that unsettling circumstances are swirling around me, I am choosing to not let my heart be troubled. I am choosing to accept the peace that Jesus gives me. I am choosing to be a peace-maker.

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Click here to learn more about the painting.

Edward Hicks painted many versions of The Peaceable Kingdom, taking the theme from a passage from the Book of Isaiah, 11:6-8, which tells of all the animals gathering together in harmony. Hicks recast the Biblical text as a poem:

The wolf did with the lambkin dwell in peace.

His grim carnivorous nature there did cease

The leopard with the harmless kid laid down

And not one savage beast was seen to frown

The lion with the fatling on did move

A little child was leading them in love.

Day 27: Words and Pictures: Essence

Essence. “the intrinsic nature or indispensable quality of something, especially something abstract, that determines its character; the most significant element, quality, or aspect of a thing or person.”

If someone were to describe you, what is your most significant quality? What would be your “essence”?

I heard two different stories recently that made me wonder about this idea of essence and if that is something that transcends and stays with us even as we change.

Amy Grant tells a story she heard from her friend. This friend had a young twenty-something niece who died in a car accident. The niece was an avid letter writer, to the point that when her church was waiting for the youth pastor to arrive in the fall, the niece sent him letters throughout the summer describing the various kids and families to him as a “get to know” type of prep. Tragically, the niece died unexpectedly over Labor Day weekend and so never got to personally meet the youth pastor. However the youth pastor gave her eulogy because through those letters he had gotten to know her. The other quality of the niece was her reaction to music in church. She was one who could not just listen to hymns and church music and keep her hands in her lap. She had to raise her hands in the air even though she was the only one doing it in her staid, conservative church.

Years later the niece’s family received a letter from the fifty year old man who received the girl’s heart. He expressed his gratitude for his life gift from her and the family as well asked a couple of questions. He said that he was a simple man with a simple education and never had written a letter before in his life yet since receiving the heart he found he wrote letters all the time- to friends, children, grandchildren. He wanted to know if she wrote letters? Also, he wondered what she did in worship since he could not contain his arms during music, he would raise his hands in the air. Again, something that he would’ve never done before receiving the heart.

What was it about the essence of that girl that found its way into the memory of hers/now his heart?

I also heard a snippet of a rebroadcast of a radio show I had heard a while back (see blog post September 16, 2016 ) It was talking about the change of a caterpillar to butterfly, seemingly two different organisms. Is there something of the first, some essence, that embeds into the second?

The radio show gave the example of an experiment done at Georgetown University. Can moths remember what happened to them as caterpillars? The scientists took caterpillars and exposed them to a noxious gas- something that smelled awful- while giving them a little shock. They did this enough times that it created an aversion for the caterpillars to the smell. With another group of caterpillars, they did not do anything. Both sets of caterpillars went through the pupae stage- which dissolves their bodies and their brains- and emerged as moths. They then exposed both the two groups of moths to the same noxious smell. The moths who as caterpillars hadn’t been exposed to the smell weren’t affected but the group of moths who as caterpillars had been shocked with the smell, avoided the stench as moths. Seemed like something in their transformation remained in their memory.

Both stories made me think: what would remain about me if my surroundings changed? Would people recognize me from before? What is the essence of my character?

What about you? Do you feel that there is anything worth saving from “before”? What does the before and after look like for you? Sometimes it is a before/after of physical transformation- before/after weight gain or loss, before/after surgery, before/after illness. Sometimes it is a before/after religious experience- before/after becoming a Christian, Buddhist, Muslim. Sometimes it is a before/after behavioral lifestyle change- before/after quitting a harmful substance or addictive behavior. Or a before/after a situational change- before/after a death, marriage, birth.

Whatever the change might be, what makes you- you?

The psalmist declares that we are fearfully and wonderfully made. As we were knit in our mother’s womb, God knew all about us. He knows the very hairs on our head. If we are made in God’s image, I imagine that what remains, regardless of circumstances is our specific essence of God. Each one of us expresses an attribute of the total God (which is why we need community).

Perhaps when we are transformed by Him into what He intended for us from the beginning, we become more our authentic true self. We become a deeper, fuller expression of the essence of ourselves and part of the bigger, deeper and fuller expression of God.

Day 26: Words and Pictures: Floating

This past week, my nephew wrote and preached about a concept of top-down versus bottom-up thinking. The premise is that as humans in general and Americans in particular we view our lives as top-down. We have an ideal of perfection and anything short of that is substandard which causes us to be discontent, unhappy and dissatisfied with what we have. We feel entitled to the perfect ideal and shortchanged if that doesn’t occur. Contrary, if we are grateful and thankful for whatever we have, we are more likely to be appreciative, content and joyful in our lifestyle.

I think he is on to something. It is not that we shouldn’t have goals and targets but that we should start in a place of appreciation of our lives, of our circumstances, and of our material possessions. There are so many blessings that we do not even give consideration: trash pick up; water from the tap; light when we flip a switch, etc. One thing this pandemic has done for many is to open our eyes to a whole new world of workers: the faceless person behind the convenient store counter or the never-before-given- eye-contact grocery store checker or re-stocker. People and work for whom and for which we should be grateful.

It makes me think of the annual world happiness report- a “survey of the state of global happiness that ranks 156 countries by how happy their citizens perceive themselves to be.” The Nordic countries seem to be in the top tier every year. I have heard it said that one of the reasons they are so happy is that they have low expectations. While the actually report doesn’t say that expressly, they did report under the Nordic exception that research has “consistently shown that social comparisons matter for well-being…This is corroborated by findings according to which status anxiety, defined as the fear of failing to conform to the ideals of success laid down by society, tends to be lower in Nordic countries compared to most other countries measured.” It seems as if our Nordic counterparts aren’t too worried about failing to hit the perfectionism mark. “In assessing how good their lives are, humans often compare their own lives to the lives of those around them. This makes people’s subjective perception of their position in society more predictive of well-being than objective measures such as income.” The report goes on to explain, “ seems possible that keeping up with the Joneses doesn’t carry as much weight in Nordic countries as in the US and many other countries.”

Isn’t that a bottoms-up type thinking? If I am focused and grateful on what I have, I won’t be concerned with what someone else has and I won’t be setting a unrealistic standard and goal for myself.

It is the old adage of the half-empty or half-full glass. Those with the half-empty would say that they need to do everything possible to have a full glass. After all, isn’t that the standard? There isn’t much rest- mentally or physically until that measurement happens.

The half-full would see that the glass has a fair amount of water in it already and while making plans to fill it up, would be stopping to have a sip, to enjoy the refreshing liquid along the way.

Have you ever noticed that if the gas tank is on the 1/2 to full side of the gauge, it seems to take a long time for it to move downward? But if the indicator is between the 1/2 to empty side, it seems to go very quickly regardless if the same amount of miles are driven? I am sure that the miles per gallon is the same on either side of the half way point but my perception doesn’t share that. If we view life with an attitude of appreciation and positivity, we are more likely to “enjoy the ride”.

There are times however, when all the positivity just cannot carry us. The thing about the half-empty and half-full glass of water is that sometimes, we don’t even want to think about the water level. Life is too difficult or depressing or disturbing to worry about contemplating our viewpoint from either bottom or top. We don’t even know which way is up or down. We feel that we are floundering. We are beyond worry and anxiety and certainly are no where near a place of contentment or happiness.

When that happens, what do you do? Have you found that you feel like you are floundering while experiencing this pandemic?

I recently texted with a friend about that foundering feeling. We all get it. Whether it is from a point of overwhelming stress, anxiety, grief or dramatic life change, it still can feeI the same- trying to keep one’s head above the waves, treading water as fast as one can, yet still getting knocked in the nose and mouth with a snoot full of brine. When those times happen to me, I imagine myself floating. That is the thing with treading water- if you feel tired and need a little reprieve, you can always turn onto your back and float. Of course, floating isn’t a sustainable action- it won’t get you anywhere but it can offer some respite from kicking and windmilling below the water surface. Even if we are trying to reset our viewpoint from top to bottom, floating is the time for renewing our minds.

What about you? Do you need to float for a little while? Give yourself permission to do so. And then, when feeling refreshed, come back to viewing your life situation from a bottoms-up perspective- looking at what blessings you have in your life- big or small and enjoying them as you go along.

Recently discovered photo of me at our beloved Cape Cod. While I am not floating per se, I am taking a respite. As only a three-year-old (I think that was my age?) can do.

Day 25: Words and Pictures: Diaries

What comes to mind when you think of a diary? A school girl’s pink book with a “security” lock on the side?

I am a life-long, half-hearted diarist. I am not nor have ever been a regular journal writer. I go in waves and my content has always been brain dumps. Whatever is on my mind, whatever I am processing or learning shows up on the pages. My only regret is that my handwriting is so poor even now as I reread, even things I wrote yesterday, I sometimes wonder what did I write? I have always had my thoughts run faster than my hands.

I have some of my old notebook/diaries from when I was a kid. They contain the typical kid angst- mad at siblings for some “injustice”, wishing certain things would happen, getting chosen for a lead in a play, choir solo, winning a competition, feelings about friends. I would write about spiritual things too and my understanding of the time of what Bible stories meant to me.

Currently, I journal about everything. I tried having separate books for my writing ideas, for my Bible reading and personal application, and just general life details. Unfortunately I find that numerous books are too much trouble, similarly to when I have too many lists going. The only problem with dumping everything in one place is that it is hard to reference or find an idea that I want to explore.

I was fascinated by the article in last Sunday’s New York Times about diaries found- specifically Dutch diaries from WWII. The Dutch minister of education, Gerrit Bolkestein appealed to the citizens to preserve their diaries and letters. “Only if we succeed in bringing this simple, daily material together in overwhelming quantity, only then will the scene of this struggle for freedom be painted in full depth and shine” . Many are familiar with Anne Frank’s account of her war years. Included in the article were others who described their respective war years- the invasion of the Netherlands, what the day to day life was like in the concentration camp, the famine during the blockades. While diaries used to be seen with disdain as too biased in presenting history, there is now a new recognition of their importance in understanding points of time in our history.

In addition to Anne Frank, I am familiar with Winston Churchill, Nelson Mandela, Captain Scott but I never knew that the author of Robinson Crusoe wrote a dairy about the Great Plague of London of 1665. Daniel Defoe was only five during the plague but he wrote in vivid detail the progress of the disease and the desperate attempts to stop it. What a timely read if I have the courage.

In thinking about diaries, it would be important for us to put on paper what we are witnessing and experiencing. I think it would be helpful not only for ourselves as we process this unusual period in history but also as a first person witness for future generations.

In moving my mother-in-law to an assisted living apartment, we had to downsize her current place. We found old calendars that contained small diary-type entries. Most were daily habits and activities, “dinner with B & C; Knicker’s (family bunny) gave birth today; J’s birthday celebrated with mother and dad,” Some were sad, “Mother died today @ hospital” (How I wished there were more details and feelings about it.) Earlier calendars had entries from her father containing what, from where and cost of any household item- from appliance to hand tool. These snippets give a fuller picture and experience to the verbal stories and the black and white photos and round out family memories.

Journals can also settle family debates. I think it was Madeleine L’Engle who said her journals were helpful when the family would argue over a particular happening. When one person would insist that such and such occurred and the other family member insisted that something else happened, she could pull out her dated journal entries to “settle” the debate. There are some things that cannot be googled.

I am thinking of journaling more about this pandemic experience. Not from any profound, philosophical standpoint but rather from a catalogue about the small day-to-day details: making and wearing masks, the phenomenon of youtube/facebook live streams and zoom chats, walking and social distancing.

What about you? Have you ever kept a diary? Do you still? What is in it? Why do you keep one? For future generations? As a coping mechanism for stressful times? As a remembrance of events- good and bad?

The physical act of writing on paper can help us process our anxiety, fears, and plans. It doesn’t have to be great prose. Just a list or phrase will do. One can use an “official” journal, or notebook pages or calendar entry. It might be a series of written letters never sent.

Whether or not we will ever share them or not, it is helpful to have a physical remembrance of our specific time and experience on earth. You might even want to rid yourself of them at some point. I am thinking those childish ones might need to go some day. Although there is something to be gleaned even from rubbish diaries. While I am a far cry from being significant like her, I think it is a great loss that Queen Victoria’s original dairies from 1840 onward were mostly destroyed.

During this time at home, why not think about recording what is happening around you? For all you know, what you observe might be helpful to someone in the future.

Day 24: Words and Pictures: Share

My husband shared with me an interesting article that he had read on Deutsche Welle News online. It was an interview with an Israeli historian and professor. He was asked about the current global pandemic. As Professor Yuval Noah Harari observed, “I think the biggest danger is not the virus itself. Humanity has all the scientific knowledge and technological tools to overcome the virus. The really big problem is our own inner demons, our own hatred, greed and ignorance. I'm afraid that people are reacting to this crisis not with global solidarity, but with hatred, blaming other countries, blaming ethnic and religious minorities. But I hope that we will be able to develop our compassion, and not our hatred, to react with global solidarity, which will develop our generosity to help people in need. And that we develop our ability to discern the truth and not believe all these conspiracy theories. If we do that, I have no doubt that we can easily overcome this crisis.” **

I would agree with him and also add fear to the list of inner demons with which people are struggling.

The question becomes then, how do we combat that? How do we rise above our inner demons of hatred, fear, blaming others? How do we develop compassion?

I think we need to return to what we learned as children: we need to remember to share.

I read an interesting story. A reporter once asked a farmer why his corn won the state fair contest every year. The farmer revealed that it was because he shared his seeds with neighbors. The perplexed reporter wondered why. The farmer’s answer: “Sir, don’t you know? The wind picks up pollen from ripening corn and swirls it from field to field. If my neighbors grew inferior corn, cross-pollination would degrade the quality of my corn. If I am to grow good corn, I must help my neighbor do the same.”    

When we share we feel good. According to a 2008 Harvard Business School survey, when people give away money it lifts one’s spirits more than spending that money on oneself. When we share whatever we have, we feel that we have more than enough. We feel “wealthy”. We don’t have to feel scared that someone else will “get one over on us”, to feel that someone else is taking away that which we are entitled

When we share we are lifted out of ourselves- thinking about ourselves and our needs and wants- and begin to think of someone else. Would this thing that I am sharing help them in their situation? What we might be stewing and worrying about takes second place when we start thinking of others and how we can help them. I know that the best way for me to snap out of a funk is to help someone else- to share my time, (limited) talent and resources with them.

I think that sharing helps block those demons of hatred. On some level there is an invisible bond that is created when we share. How can one hate someone who has partaken in something that was yours? This thing that we have shared connects me to you- it might be an obligation or it could just be a mutual appreciation.

I was teary-eyed as I read the following letter that NY Governor Andrew Cuomo received and read on yesterday’s daily press briefing. Click here to see the video.

What about you? How do you counter the demons of this world? What heart stirring stories have you heard this week?

How can we get rid of the demons? Share. Be compassionate. Show humility. Remember that for each one of us, “by the grace of God go I”. We ARE in this all together.

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** Click here to read the article.